


In Sickness And In Health

by rainbowslovehl (Larrymateforlife)



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Accidental Cuddling, Alaska, American Harry, Because I don't know, Boss/Employee Relationship, British Louis, But not quite, Fake Marriage, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Fluff and Angst, M/M, No Smut, Pining, Sharing a Bed, Slow Burn, nosy family, oblivious boys, where the angst is minimal
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-14
Updated: 2018-07-14
Packaged: 2019-05-31 03:00:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 83,195
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15110438
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Larrymateforlife/pseuds/rainbowslovehl
Summary: “Just make sure that you head down to the immigration office as soon as you can, alright?” James reminded them, making them look towards the man and nod in unison. “Remember Louis, you have only two weeks. So make it legal quickly so you don’t get deported.”“I’ll be sure to remind my assistant to schedule our appointment,” Louis joked and laughed.A loosely based The Proposal Au where Louis is to be deported in two weeks. Since he doesn't want to lose his job, he asks his assistant, Harry to marry him for a green card. If it makes them realise they're in love, oh well. There's also the fact that no one doubts their credibility.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [sweetharry](https://archiveofourown.org/users/sweetharry/gifts).



> First of all, thank you for this plot because I sure as hell was waiting for a sign to write the proposal au and I got it. Secondly, I would like to thank the mods of this exchange.  
> I wasn’t planning to write this long but it sort of got out of hand and I’m proud of how much I wrote. It is the longest one I’ve written and was working on it for three months. It’s my baby but I’m still happy it’s done.  
> The biggest thank you goes out to Ammu, who cheered me when I was about to give up and for beta-ing this for me. I don’t know what I would do without you. This one is for you.  
> Now to disclaimers. Full disclosure, I do not have a clue about how the publishing houses work and neither have I been to Alaska. My knowledge is from the internet and the film itself so I hope I’m right in this. I’m sorry for any mistakes. Plus, I don’t know about immigration through marriage, or frauds for that matter so thanking the internet for that again. I tried my best to research but if I fall short somewhere, don’t take this as anything but fiction, thank you. Oh and don’t commit frauds, please. You don’t have to watch the movie to read this, since only the main plot points and a few of the dialogues have been taken directly. Otherwise everything is changed, since I couldn’t for the life of me write Louis as an actual dick. And I’m shit at breaking up chapters so they’re of very uneven lengths, sorry.  
> Title is from Wedding Dress by Matt Nathanson, even if it might seem like it's from the marriage vows. The song kinda is a perfect fit.  
> Hope you all love reading this!  
> The Russian version of this fic is also [ available! ](https://ficbook.net/readfic/7630450)

It was the last Monday in the month of May and just a few minutes to nine. And since he had to be in the office at nine am sharp, it was safe to say he was late.

To be honest, the day and month weren’t all that important except for the fact that it made a great pun. It was mayhem! And he admitted, it wasn’t one of his best puns but he did his best as he ran past the suit-clad crowd who were headed to their own offices. His shoulder bag had been jostled in the run, swinging over so it was uncomfortably bouncing on his hip. And he couldn’t even move it in place, since in his hands he was cradling two cups of coffee while hoping nothing sloshed out of the cups. Harry should have invested more time in gym since he had been running for around ten minutes now and he was already out of breath. He allowed himself a small smile at the sight of the familiar glass building, before twisting his hand away and halting to avoid crashing into someone. The man had the audacity to scowl when he was the one who had come in Harry’s way but there was no time for argument, hence he slowed down to a jog and kept going on. Harry smiled at the security guards, who gave him a small, pitying smile and then he was in, sliding in the elevator just before the doors closed. The people behind him grumbled and he apologised while wiping his forehead on his sleeve. Harry was completely winded up, shirt displaying pit stains while his hair was no doubt sweaty and messy. But hey, at least he had managed to make it to the elevator with his coffee intact, which he counted as a win.

The few minutes that it took to reach his floor, Harry rested his forehead against the cool steel and waited for his breathing to go back to normal. He had forgotten to set his alarm for today but lucky for him, he woke up due to force of habit. His schedule was pushed back by an hour so he took the unwise decision of skipping breakfast and taken a shower instead, ignoring the growls of his stomach. His hair had been wet when he left the house but no doubt the wind had dried his hair into a curlier, messier state. Luckily, he had long made himself the habit of laying out his clothes the night before. So he saved time on that, buttoning his shirt and slung his jacket over his messenger bag before he left. Jeannie, the usual barista, who sympathised with him (and probably fancied him as well), had already made his order. She had winked at him as she held up the cups and Harry had given her, and everyone else, a bright smile as he skipped the queue and paid for the coffees. He managed to leave with only a few curses directed at him and had been sprinting to work ever since. So as the doors opened to this floor, Harry took in a deep breath as he stepped out. Finally, he thought.

Jade gave him an amused smile with a cautionary raise of eyebrows and Harry shrugged at her. He started to walk past her and only then remembered that he had something to discuss with her. As he turned to tell her that they needed to talk later, it marked the end of his (slightly) lucky streak.

The next set of events happened in a matter of seconds.

Someone was walking behind him, and as Harry turned, they crashed into him and jostled his arm. It led to the Styrofoam cup in that hand being squeezed too hard in response and Harry watched as the hot coffee splashed down the front of his shirt. He stared at it in horror, barely realising how his chest felt as if it was on fire. The first thing he realised was that, to his misfortune, the cup that had spilt was his boss’. Well fuck.

“I am so sorry,” the guy was saying, his hand clasped over his mouth as he apologised furiously. He was watching Harry with wide, guilt filled eyes as he slowly backed away, hands moving uselessly. No coffee had spilt on him, but Harry’s white shirt was now soaked and stained brown. It was his favourite white shirt too, with ruffled collars and cuffs and now it was all ruined. The stains would not go that easy, or at all really, and he was in grief. Of course, went without saying that his chest was stinging due to the hot coffee and his heart pounding in his chest. He was so screwed.

“Fucking hell,” Harry muttered under his breath, trying his best to keep his voice low as he sighed heavily. He could hear the silence that had overtaken the floor and weighed on him. He could feel the eyes of his nosy colleagues on him as they waited for his reaction and pitied him too. The boss would be mad, they knew it, but also probably loved the drama of it. So Harry sighed and accidentally relinquished the grip on the almost empty cup, which fell to the floor and splashed the remnant coffee on his trousers. He didn’t care one bit, even if this action would be cared by him later. Right now, he was preoccupied with cussing at everyone and everything. Especially his fate. “Oh fucking hell, this can’t be happening now. Not today.”

“I am so sorry, Mr. Styles,” the man repeated as he returned with some tissues, waving in front of Harry’s face awkwardly. Harry glanced up and recognised him as Earl, the new intern who was just as clumsy as Harry was. He could feel the fear and indecision in his eyes, no doubt waiting to be yelled at. As if Harry would. He had been in Earl’s situation plenty of times so he knew better. But he couldn’t help but sigh, tightening his grip around the other cup of coffee. He pinched the material of his formerly white shirt with his free hand and pulled it away from his chest. The coffee was already drying, settling into the cloth and he would have to throw it away. But the shirt wasn’t his biggest concern right now, even though it is up there in his priority list. The most worrying thing was the spilt coffee, meaning his boss.

Harry had started working at Colden Books three years ago. He had walked in the building with hopeful eyes and a dream of helping in the editorial and publishing business, probably getting the chance of getting to publish something of his own one day. Harry had got into this due to his hobby of writing and the few people who had read it told him it was good. But his dreams got crushed along the way and stomped on due to a certain Louis Tomlinson, and to Harry’s misfortune, his boss. Louis was the kind of guy who would draw you in with his eyes before berating you with his mouth for a job which wasn’t to the best of your capability. Sure, he wasn’t the worst person in the world but he was certainly the worst person in Harry’s life. He was the best at what he did, was one of the most reputed editors as well and Harry envied how good he was at it. He was also in awe of him but mostly, he resented the guy. It was everything about Louis, especially the way he was also known to be, to put it mildly, a mean asshole. He was very particular about some things, which included his nine am coffee. He had been toeing the line a lot lately and was let off with warning glances. But not today, since Harry was late and with no coffee in his hand, which was a reason for some major concern.

For a coffee hating, tea-loving Englishman, Louis certainly was very particular about coffee runs.

“I got you some tissues,” Earl said redundantly waving the wad of tissues, since Harry was yet to react.“I didn’t mean to run into you like that.”

“Thanks, man,” Harry finally said with a pained smile as he accepted the tissues. He dabbed them uselessly on his stained shirt, knowing that the coffee had already seeped in enough. He sighed for what would be the millionth time and closed his eyes as he tightened his grip slightly around the other cup. There was not enough time to run back and get Jeannie to make him another quick order and rush back. Harry took his coffee too sweet for Louis’ preference so that would certainly be a no go. When he opened his eyes again, he found Earl hovering still, as if still expecting to be yelled at. Harry chuckled, shaking his head. “Oh it’s alright, Earl, don’t you worry. I know it wasn’t your fault. It’s just my luck that’s cursed. It’s alright.”

Harry forced out a harsh laugh as he threw the used tissues in the nearby bin and headed towards his cubicle. He wanted to take a nap and forget the day ever happened even if it had just begun. Everything was great, just fucking great.

But on second thoughts, Harry wasn’t really at fault for being late today. He had been up until one doing something that Louis had given him to do and it wasn’t even in his job description. Yet, he had ruined his Sunday evening where he had planned to relax and catch up on the latest episodes of Stranger Things. Peace and freedom from Louis Tomlinson was not in his cards, apparently, and hadn’t been ever since he had submitted his resume three years ago. He wondered sometimes if switching his phone off during weekends would be a good idea but he didn’t dare doing it. But the point remained that today was not Harry’s fault and he shouldn’t have to listen from his boss. He wished he was gutsy enough to say it to his face rather grumble it to his sister later. He bloody fucking wished.

Harry walked up to his cubicle, free hand twisting the strap of his bag so it rested on his hip again. He caught the eyes of his colleagues who were shooting him sympathetic looks and refrained from rolling his eyes. As much as they felt sorry for him, they would be the first to press their ears against the glass doors to hear what was being said. They were just a bunch of gossips and had befriended Harry just because of that. On the second day, a few of his colleagues had come up to him in the pretence of ‘welcoming him’ before asking him what Louis was like with him. Harry was the first assistant Louis had since he was promoted just one year prior to when he had joined. They wanted to know if Louis was just as harsh and mean as he was with everyone and since then, Harry refrained from sharing too much with them. It just didn’t sit right to talk about someone like that, even if the person was someone he disliked. It reminded him a lot of people back home, and he had to refrain from yelling at nothing in the middle of the day.

“He arrived about half an hour ago,” Darren whispered, nodding his head towards Louis’ door. The blinds were pulled shut hence it was impossible for anyone to tell if anyone was in there but Darren had probably seen him come in. Louis specially had the blinds put in, as he told Harry one day, mainly because he hated prying eyes as well. Harry snorted in lieu of a response as he placed the cup on his desk before taking out his bag. He removed his jacket from where it draped over his bag and leisurely put it on. He was already late by, what the clock told him, ten minutes so what was another minute right? “He seemed to be in a good mood, well for him. So he wouldn’t yell at you as much, I think.”

“I doubt it, but thank you Darren,” Harry said as he gave him a half smile and pushed his hair away from his forehead. He picked up the cup of coffee and marched towards the door with determination, very unsure of his decision. As he was left with no other option, so he took in a deep breath and knocked before pushing the door in. Louis always told him to walk right in and he barely responded to Harry’s knocks, but his mom had taught him to be polite and he was. So knocking on the door was a habit more than anything. “Sir?” he asked in a low, meek voice.

Louis swivelled his chair to face him, sharp blue eyes lingering on him for a few seconds before he nodded and hitched his legs up on the table. He leaned back in his chair and looked out the window, as Harry assumed he was doing earlier. He refrained from rolling his eyes the second time in the past few minutes as he walked further in, cradling the cup in his hand and waited. Louis looked impeccable as always in a pressed, dark blue suit with his hair pushed up in a perfect, unmovable quiff. The quiff never ever wilted, even if they were walking through a windy plain. Harry knew because while the wind had blown his hair into knots, Louis’ hair had stayed put. He was clean shaved as always and Harry knew that Louis had made himself the habit of shaving daily ever since he was twenty-three. Louis had been the one to tell him that, of course, and in the same sentence he had told Harry to practise the same. Little did he know that Harry couldn’t even grow a proper stubble. There was this one day that he grew something that vaguely resembled a stubble and cut himself in a hurry to shave. Louis had made a remark about it before suggesting the best solution for healing the cut, weirdly enough. Louis also presumably disproved of his wild curls, often casting distrustful looks at it. And at the beginning, Harry was sure he hated them, even though he never said anything. Then one day he had offhandedly praised his hair and Harry had realised he just didn’t like that they were messy, which yeah he understood. He still loved his hair, messy and all.

Everything in his life regarding Louis in the past three years always confused him. In the first year of working he was sure that Louis hated him or didn’t care. Everyone led him to believe the same since Louis was slightly cold hearted and detached. But slowly he realised it wasn’t the case. When it came to Harry, Louis was hot and cold and confusing. Hence Harry kept on his toes, knowing Louis would always do something unexpected. Like now, hopefully.

Harry shifted his weight from feet to feet, absently touching his ruined shirt as he listened to the familiar tapping sound. Louis had this strange habit of tapping his fingers in a tune whenever he was anxious or happy. It was the same damn tune that was stuck in Harry’s head by this point and it was unshakable. Hearing that tapped tune made him shriek sometimes but he couldn’t, since Louis would shriek louder. Harry was trying not to look as pained as he felt and that was the exact moment that Louis looked at him. The moment was short but when Louis’ eyes darted down to his shirt, his eyes did linger a little longer on him. The corner of his lips turned down as he stared at Harry’s torso, no wonder displeased at the brown stains. It made Harry anxious, heat rising to his cheeks as he self-consciously pushed his fingers through his hair and held in a sigh. Their eyes met for a brief few seconds that stretched before Louis looked away, laughing at something the person on the other end had said. It was his fake, business laughter of course, since it was too perfected to be the real one. He had heard his real laugh only a few times and it was more of giggling and snorting than the practised ‘haha’, which he was doing right now. Why was he so goddamn poised and practised.

Louis Tomlinson had recently turned thirty yet he held the topmost position in the company. Or at least in the publishing sector since Harry was clueless about everything else. He worked twice as hard as anyone else did and wearing himself out. So Harry guessed that granted him twice as much as arrogance as well. There were already grey hairs by his ears and signs of crow’s feet by his eyes, which was the result of working himself to dead and isolation. Yet he showed no sign of stopping. Louis ran on three cups of coffee which was served to him at a three hour interval and very little food. He slept less than five hours each night, lesser when swamped with work. Harry knew it all. Louis was what one would call a workaholic – married to his job and barely having a social life. Harry knew he stayed awake at nights since he was more often than not roused by Louis’ messages about notes for the next day. And he was ninety percent sure Louis talked to only three people about something that didn’t concern work, and one of them was Harry. His life was pretty sad, if it wasn’t annoying Harry. He listened to Louis’ little rambles, usually when they were out somewhere either going to parties to socialise and gain clients or to a book festival for, again, socialising and finding potential clients.

Louis barely had a life outside of work hence Harry’s social life had suffered a lot as well over the years. He would randomly call Harry to assign him some minor research work, again completely unrelated to his actual job. And then there were few calls when Louis had a slight tremble in his voice and Harry just knew. He was too stubborn to ask for help and Harry knew a thing or two about stubbornness. So he pulled himself out of social things, decreased contact with people from his hometown and helped Louis instead, like he had last night without getting any gratitude.

When Louis wasn’t working, he was a slightly different person. The moment he swapped his expensive suits for expensive sportswear, the rigidity in his posture caved in to be replaced by a softer look. His hair would be often let down and mussed, without any product. And he managed to look young somehow, ten times more approachable when he didn’t hold a stiff posture and a permanent grimace. Weirdly enough, that was his more difficult side, Harry thought. He usually got a little sarcastic and a lot giggly, which confused Harry the next day when he walked in the office to find a prim, sharp person with gleaming eyes and a voice that was always cold and unwelcoming. In the process of figuring him out, Harry had managed to master every one of his frowns and twitches of his eyebrow. And Louis had made it apparent that he could read him as well. Strange.

Despite that, they were not friends or even acquaintances for that matter. Louis still acted impassively and Harry still resented him and rolled his eyes.

But if he was to be really, really honest with himself, Harry found himself stuck somewhere between admiring and disliking the man behind the desk. He disliked his smug, winning smile and the humourless laughter but admired the success he had managed to acclaim at such young age. Well he also found himself admiring Louis a little too much but he didn’t focus on that part.

“That’s absolutely great, Frank,” Louis was saying, lips twitching into resemblance of a smile but devoid of the actual emotion. He kept his gaze outside the window and Harry had grown impatient. Five minutes had passed since Harry was standing there and there was no response from Louis. So as quietly as he could, Harry placed the Styrofoam cup on the coaster and tried to sneak out. He would prefer to not be there when Louis took the first sip and realised that the coffee was sweeter than usual. But of course, his boss’ head snapped towards him the minute he took a step sideways and towards the door. He was given a sharp look that pinned him to the spot and a quick movement of hands telling him to stay. Hence he did, unfreezing and taking a step back into place as he nodded, feeling chagrined. He clasped his hands behind his back and waited. “I knew I was right to trust you for this job, Frank. Yes definitely. I’ll call you again later. Goodbye.”

And as soon as Louis took the phone away from his ear, the half smile slid off his face and turned into a slight grimace. Harry squared his shoulders the moment Louis’ fell on him and his nose itched self-consciously. Louis’ eyes were fixated on his shirt, eyebrows rising up when he looked at his face. He kept his phone on the desk without breaking eye contact and took his feet off the desk. He did it with grace and practised precision, not knocking off even one thing like Harry surely would have. Louis then leaned forward in his chair, face impassive as always as he entwined his fingers in front of him. He looked like his usual business self right now, with his face giving nothing away and his lips pressed into a thin, displeased line.

“So, Harry.”

“Yes, Mr. Tomlinson?”

“What time is it now?” he asked, tilting his head to a side. His eyebrows rose higher on his forehead and so did Harry’s heartbeats, went higher that is. Even if he was too used to Louis’ various faces, his ‘threatening face’ always seemed to do its job. Louis managed to look threatening even though no person that height should be able to. Louis’ quiff didn’t move even a little as he moved his head. Even the circles under his eyes looked like a sign of power than of exhaustion. Wow that guy needed to take care of himself. But also, he wondered how Louis had managed to turn into this person. How he could be so off-putting and rude while being powerful and fascinating at the same time. He also wondered why he felt the urge to berate him while tucking him under a blanket and telling him to rest. It was strange. Harry spent an embarrassing amount of time trying to figure out what made Louis Tomlinson the way he was and he should be embarrassed about it, but wasn’t. He justified it as a psychological survey. He had, after all, taken two classes of psychology 101.

“Um twenty minutes past nine?” Harry said, lifting the end of the sentence as he widened his eyes and blinked. It was his ‘innocent and endearing’ look which worked ninety percent of the time but never on Louis, to his misfortune. He seemed to be immune to everything and displeased by everything. It also made Harry wonder how he would react to a puppy, or cute things. (Yeah he did spend a lot of time thinking about his boss. He should stop doing that.) “I’m sorry that I’m late, sir. But in my defence, I knocked into someone on my way in.”

“As I can see,” Louis intoned, eyes flitting down pointedly to Harry’s shirt and then back up. His fingers pinched the bridge of his nose, covering his mouth while his eyes sparkled with stifled amusement. So Darren had been right when he said Louis was in a good mood. His voice was upbeat and not ice cold and his posture wasn’t stiff. Harry was lucky today after all, stained shirt and scorched chest aside. “According to what I see, you’ve spilt one cup of coffee today while you have the other one. So which cup did you spill?”

“Uh um m-mine?” he stammered, watching as Louis’ eyebrows rose even higher, if it was possible. He didn’t trust Harry one bit, but not in a malicious way. Yet Harry’s heart hammered loudly as Louis reached for the cup. Without breaking eye contact, Louis pressed his lips against the cup as he took a sip and his face scrunched up immediately in distaste. Harry winced and closed his eyes, letting a soft sigh fall off his lips. He was screwed.

“ Styles, I think you’ve forgotten that I don’t prefer sugar in my coffee,” Louis remarked coolly, amusement colouring his words. Harry opened one eye to see that Louis’ face was blank as ever but his eyes were gleaming with delight. Maybe it was the sugar that had sweetened the mood, but he didn’t look mad in the least. Louis pursed his lips to stop smiling and raised his eyebrows, as Harry opened his second eye as well. “Someone named Jeannie wants you to call her. So do you need the cup?”

Harry snorted, unable to stop himself and Louis smiled just a little before slipping back into impassive. “I’m gay, Louis, you know that.”

“I do.” Louis nodded, eyebrows raised as he took another sip of the coffee and made a face. “But it’s nice to know that you add an insane amount of sugar to your coffee. It’s making me sick but it’s not that bad. So this time, Styles, I’ll let you get away with it. But just this once, alright. If you get my order wrong another time, keep in mind that I will be the one to throw this liquid on your favourite shirt. Get me?”

“Yes sir,” Harry said through clenched teeth, biting back his remark. There were so many things he would say if they weren’t at office. For one thing, he would call Louis out on his bluff since he would never be that harsh. Secondly, he would ask how he knew it was Harry’s favourite shirt. And thirdly, he would tell Louis that it wasn’t his fault that he was late. But he couldn’t say any of it so he nodded. He was feeling as if he was thrown back into his first year at this job (when he was unsure). He had been nervous, new to New York City and far, so far away from home. He had managed to snag the assistant job with a little assistance from his stepfather and it was something that was far more than what he deserved. But he had thought if he did his best and pleased his boss then he would look like he deserved it. Maybe he would get a quick promotion and an even better post. He felt lucky, knowing he was one step closer to changing the world with his words or something. He was also unlucky. To his misfortune, his boss was the hard to please Englishman, Louis Tomlinson, who had wiggled up his way far more quickly up the ranks with a lot of effort. It was tough for a non-American, but then he was the youngest editor in chief at Colden Books, a company that owed a lot to him at this point. Louis had a big hand in giving the company the prestige it had since he had brought in a lot of clients with his easy charm and sexy accent before he turned into this ice queen. Harry had admired him then, felt like it would be an honour to work under him but then he, well, met him.

Louis’ cold and snappish behaviour had made Harry realise why everyone had been giving him pitying looks on the first day. And then in a year he realised why everyone hated him while fearing him that much, when Harry was barely given free weekends but endless meaningless tasks. And due to that man, Harry had taken to evade people from his old life and not make stronger acquaintances in his current life. Or so he told everyone, when the truth was he avoided them due to another reason. “So may I leave?”

Louis hummed, taking a sip of his too sweet coffee out of habit before he frowned. He raised his index finger to halt Harry and kept the cup on the coaster. Louis then rummaged in one of the drawers, eyebrows drawn in concentration before he found whatever he was looking for. It was Harry’s turn to frown as something blurry was flying towards him, hitting him softly on the face. He caught it before it fell, turning the soft material over in his fingers. It was a sweater. And not just any sweater, it was a lilac, Burberry cashmere sweater. Harry looked up at the other man in surprise, blinking blankly for a good few seconds.

“You’re very prone to spilling something on yourself so I bought this already and kept it handy for you to wear over your shirt or something,” he said flippantly as he picked up a bundle of paper from his desk and flipping through it. Harry frowned further, unused to Louis being so nice at the workplace. It wasn’t that he was always rude but this was a type of caring and it was an unexpected gesture. Harry stared from his boss to his sweater then back. It was a big surprise and he wanted to pinch himself. It was the moment when Harry started to feel as if something was going to go terribly wrong and he didn’t know why. He was overreacting, surely and he was prone to. Louis did not look up but he made a ‘tsk’ sound that startled Harry. “I can hear you thinking, you know. We have to leave for a meeting in an hour, Styles and I don’t want you to stand beside me in a coffee stained shirt is all. Don’t overthink it. Wear this on top of your shirt until lunch and then you can go buy yourself something nice.”

“Um.” Harry blinked at him in surprise before smiling a little. “Of course. Thank you Lo – Mr. Tomlinson.”

Louis didn’t look up from his papers as he waved his hand, dismissing him. But Harry was pretty sure he was smiling. “You can go now. I have this very important manuscript to read and you have calls to attend. Oh and also, whenever Winston is free just alert me, I need to talk to him so tell his assistant the same. Don’t forget.”

“I won’t,” Harry mumbled before nodding to himself. He watched his boss warily as he made his way out of the room, fingers tightening around the sweater. He caught the worried, curious eyes of his colleagues and smiled at them distractedly before sitting down at his cubicle. He sighed deeply, feeling a little out of place. And this, this was why Harry disliked Louis currently.

See, Louis hadn’t really been an asshole to Harry at the very start, despite what everyone else thought and he made it out to be. The first month, he had been sweet before turning into a nightmare and then settling somewhere in the middle, like now. He would tell him off whenever Harry fucked up his coffee or tea order, which to be fair was a complicated thing then. Harry would blink away his tears and could see the slight crack in Louis’ shields but he wouldn’t stop. Louis had changed into this confusing person a year ago, and it still fucked with Harry’s brain. He reasoned the positive change might be since his sister had moved to New York and could have knocked some sense into him. So as Harry saw it, Louis was rude to everyone but a little less rude to him. At work, that is. It was as if Louis was still a mean boss along with being a caring person, like reprimanding him (lightly) and then giving him a sweater. These small, miniscule acts of kindness just annoyed him, since he couldn’t just be a better person or anything. He had to put on a show of being a rude person. Harry couldn’t even completely hate him due to that. And he definitely didn’t understand him.

Still, Louis had ruined his social life and essentially refused to promote him. Not like Harry had explicitly asked him or something, but he wanted to be an editor maybe or a writer, preferentially. He didn’t have a professional opinion on his chances as an author and it wasn’t due to lack of trying. He had slipped a manuscript of his own sometimes, bettering himself each time but Louis would barely glance at it before discarding it. Harry knew it because he saw but he couldn’t call him on it, since it would be unprofessional so he bit his lip and picked up his disapproved manuscript and left. Maybe it was just terrible, who knew.

Harry let his head fall into his palms and revelled in his bad fate for a few seconds before he decided he had pitied himself enough. He made his way to the bathroom with his sweater and thankfully found it empty. He took off his ruined shirt and used it to dab water on his chest, wincing when he felt the slight sting. The area had gone red and itchy and he bit his lip as he looked at it.There was no ointment with him so he decided to take care of it once he got home. He stared at the sweater for a good few seconds and smiled. And as he pulled it on, his skin was irritated for just a few seconds but after, the material felt like figurative heaven on him. Lilac was really his colour, as he always thought and probably Louis did too else he wouldn’t have gifted it. But he didn’t let himself think that, instead assumed Louis had just picked a random thing since it was a size too big. He pulled up the sleeves a little and smiled at his reflection. He revealed in the softness of his sweater, before pulling on his suit jacket. The sweater was a little casual for an office setting but hopefully the blazer would make it seem more business casual. He tried not to smile as he walked out of the bathroom with his ruined shirt balled up by his side and relayed Louis’ message to Ben’s assistant before finally making his way to his cubicle. There were about two people on the way who had asked about and complimented the sweater and Harry blushed as he explained he was wearing it due to the spilt coffee. He deliberately omitted the fact that Louis had gifted him it since it would spread rumours that he didn’t want to hear. He slumped down in his chair, sighing as he rubbed his eyes, feeling tired already. It was almost ten now, he realised. So as always, he called his sister. She picked up on the second ring and greeted him with a cheery hello, even though it was seven am on her side. And Harry groaned in response, making her chuckle.

“Aw something got you down again, baby brother?” she asked even though she knew the answer and laughed at him. There was only one person who would get him frustrated, mainly because lately everything revolved around him. So Harry groaned again in lieu of a response, rubbing his face with his free hand. It was just like any other day. “Come on, now tell me. I’m listening. What did he do?”

“It’s more like.” Harry sighed, pursing his lips before launching into the start of his disastrous day. “Woke up late today then stubbed my toe on the way out. Almost missed my bus then ran the way to my office, completely out of breath and spilled coffee on my favourite shirt. Since I was late, I got reprimanded by Louis and here I am. My shirt is ruined, my day is ruined and I’m pretty sure Louis’ is too, so my day will be further ruined. Everything is just so – Hey can you not laugh, Gemma?”

“Then what do you want me to do?” she asked before laughing again, and the phone most likely slipped from her grasp since her voice was more faraway, still laughing. Harry harrumphed, drumming his fingers on the desk. Gemma always found amusement in Harry’s pain ever since they were kids. But she also loved him so Harry supposed he could forgive her. Gemma was the only one from his hometown that he was in constant touch with, mainly because she was persistent. Granted it had been only three years since he was away but it was a surprise they had almost daily conversation. Most of his old friends had gotten tired of his excuses and complains about his boss, which might be intentional on his part. There were two of his friends he sometimes talked to but even their schedule was too busy to let them have longer conversations. Still, his official excuse was that it was Louis’ fault for taking up most of his time, which was true and the rest was that he didn’t try enough. Although on good days he wondered if he should deny doing something for Louis, just to know his reaction. Louis was one scary person when angry so no one wanted to risk that. But the more Gemma laughed, the more Harry gave in to her and smiled, shaking his head. “Only you would have so many problems before ten. And all of them self-made. No, don’t interrupt. But really, I’ve told you a lot of times over the past few years to quit. You moan about your job so much, hate your boss and you aren’t doing what you love. What's holding you back?”

“Well it’s not that bad,” Harry lied as he fiddled with the hem of his sweater. Sure it was tiring just managing Louis’ schedule, taking his calls and being so polite with him all the time. It was annoying having to tag along with him everywhere because Louis insisted, for some reason. It was exhausting biting his tongue as he listened to Louis’ (often unnecessarily rude) conversations with other people while he stood in the back, sighing internally. He had forgotten how to make jokes or be sarcastic or even sleep. He might be exaggerating about everything in his life, but it wasn’t that bad. Sure he would love to do something more than this, something he had studied for. He wanted to edit and publish and everything like a few of his colleagues did. But he always reasoned it could get worse and it hadn’t yet. “Like I could go to Germany and sightsee just last month. And Louis isn’t that bad, really. He gave me a sweater just today to cover my ruined shirt. Said he had kept it aside because he expected me to trip. That's nice of him, right?”

“Okay now he confuses me,” Gemma mused and Harry snorted in reply. Harry knew that since he was the one who suffered the most due to Louis’ mood swings. “But you confuse me more. You say you hate him but whenever adds anything against him, you defend him.”

“He’s...” Harry started before sighing. She wasn’t wrong. He had a problem with that. “I don’t know.”

“Yeah alright let it be.” Harry sighed in relief, making his sister snort. “Yeah Harry you talk about your boss every day that's why I let it go. You’re lucky I have another topic to discuss.”

“You do?”

“Yeah. So the most important thing to do this week is to go home for the weekend. You’ve booked your ticket, right? When is the flight? Wait, you’re coming home right?”

Harry hummed in question as he switched the phone receiver to his other ear. He squinted at the calendar on his desk before his eyes fell on the picture beside it and realisation dawned on him. “Oh shit, it’s Gammy’s birthday! Oh yeah I remember that now. I can’t believe it’s almost June already, although I just made a joke about it being mayhem today. Get it? Anyway. I completely forgot about Gammy’s birthday, if I’m being honest due to the late nights I’ve pulled for Louis lately. He has been a little more insane this month, you know and I’ve been dragged in, of course.”

“You really need to take a break from that guy, H,” she remarked casually. “It’s like you’re in a clingy relationship even though you have a love hate thing going on with him clearly.”

“There’s no love,” Harry insisted petulantly. She said the same thing each time without fail. Usually she would insist that he needed a break before teasing how much Harry liked him but she had let it go recently. It was easy for her to say that he needed to deny his boss since she held a high editorial position on the other side of the country. Her work environment was relaxed, less stressing and surely she didn’t have Louis as her boss. Or she’d know.

“If you say. But it’s Gammy’s ninetieth birthday. She’s been waiting for this day since her eightieth.” Gemma paused to laugh but Harry didn’t join in. Mainly because he was worried. “You know how she is about birthdays and since it is ten year less than a century, she has gone a little extra. If you don’t come home, everyone will hold it against you. Especially Gammy and you know how dramatic she can get.”

“But Gems, you know I can’t!”

“Then make time somehow,” she insisted. “She’s invited everyone for the big day. And by that I do mean _everyone_.”

“Oh no,” he groaned, rubbing his eyes. He mentally surveyed the list of meetings he had for the week, checking if there was at least one person worthy enough for Louis. If that was the case then there was fat chance that Louis would give Harry the weekend off. “I really can’t promise you anything right now. He seems to be in a good mood today so I’ll ask later but you know how he is, so it might be a no from the little devil. I didn’t even get a free weekend yesterday, since he has that major client who’s being a bitch. I have to be there for him all the time, you know. Sometimes I feel more of a wife who takes care of everything for him than a work assistant. It’s exhausting.”

“Well, he _is_ your work husband,” she teased. “But remember, Harry that you got yourself into that mess. You know two years ago when I told you not to go to his house to give him soup and medicine? It was a personal gesture, which you didn’t have to do hence now you’re in his personal life. Blame yourself.”

“But Gemma,” he whined, lips forming a pout that she wouldn’t be able to see. He stared resolutely at the desk, especially since he felt eyes on him and lowered his voice. “He was very sick that day yet he was insisting he would come to work that day and I would just have to drive. You know I couldn’t let him that's why I stopped him with soup. So drop it.”

“I’m just telling you, H.”

Harry snorted, lifting his head to catch Jesy’s worried eyes. She had a panicked look on her face as she nodded her head towards her right. He frowned at her before looking to left and finding, well, the little devil himself and Harry gasped. Louis was leaning against his cubicle wall, legs crossed at his ankle while looking a picture of ease. There was a furrow between his eyebrows but also a wide sugary smile on hips, which he was trying to hide. He didn’t look scary in the least, yet it made Harry want to scream and scamper at being caught. But he didn’t do that. More like he couldn’t, since he was frozen in his chair. Technically, Harry wasn’t allowed to make to take personal calls at work even if everyone did that. And he definitely wasn’t allowed to badmouth his boss, and from the looks of it was pretty clear Mr. Tomlinson had heard it all. He looked calm and collected on the outside but in the inside he might as well be fuming. Harry was once again the centre of attention and everyone knew Louis’ smile was a facade. Harry cleared his throat noisily once he came down the shock of it all, hearing Gemma blabber on the other end. He smiled politely at his boss, biting his lower lip. “Sorry ma’am, I can’t possible book your appointment for this weekend.

“Louis is there?”

“Yes, alright goodbye.”

There were more pressing questions from Gemma on the other end which he ignored and kept down the receiver. He kept smiling at Louis, while the other man was still leaning against the wall and smiling back. Louis’ eyes were devoid of emotions though, jaw clenching as the smile quickly slid off his face. Harry hadn’t noticed earlier but Louis was wearing a navy blue fitted suit, paired with a red tie. It was an outfit that he had seen a few times over the years and he had assumed it was Louis’ favourite suit. Well, it did fit too well and colour brought out the colour of his eyes. But Harry didn’t think that. “So is that what everyone around here calls me then?” he asked in a levelled, low voice that was sure to not carry over for anyone else to hear. “The Little Devil?”

“N-no absolutely not,” Harry squeaked as he shook his head furiously. Louis cocked an unconvinced brow, making Harry more flustered than before. He stood up hurriedly, feeling small even if he towered over the other man. He flattened the creases of his trousers nervously and pulled his suit jacket closer around him. Louis gave him an appraising onceover, looking at his grey suit jacket and sweater but didn’t react. He pushed himself off the wall and uncrossed his ankles, pulling on his suit jacket. Without another word he took off towards Ben Winston’s office, and Harry was quick to follow him, grateful that he didn’t pursue the topic.

Ben was another editor at Colden Books who could be called a senior, but was a level beneath Louis and his archrival. He had a good couple of years on Louis and had spent more years in the publishing business than Louis, but was at a lower rank. It was probably why he resented Louis as much as he did and Harry had picked up on it early on. Ben was hated by a lot of people, had brought in some questionable clients as well so it wasn’t surprising that he wasn’t at a higher rank. In fact it was surprising that he was there at all. Even Harry’s colleagues sided with Louis than Ben since the former was very skilled. They agreed that Louis’ temper would be better any day than Ben’s arrogance and incompetence.

Ben was also the only one who would risk making Louis angry. He left no opportunities to belittle Louis while the latter always had cold insults ready. When Louis went extra silent, that's when he was the angriest. Everyone knew that, not just Harry, but only he knew how to calm him down. Honestly, Harry could write a book on this guy but sadly, Louis would still reject it claiming it to be inauthentic.

Anyway, Harry had planned to stay out of the whole thing just like everyone else did. But then Ben had to go and start flirting with him while Louis was present in the room hence dragging him in. It was an unwanted advance and Harry had turned him down as well since Ben was too old for him and also married. It had led to Ben insulting him at every opportunity he got, while Louis was in the room. Louis’ rage towards him had intensified after that and he began defending Harry, which he was glad for. And yet, unfortunately, Louis insisted Harry accompany him to Ben’s office. Honestly, Harry would never understand why Louis did the things he did.

Louis pushed the door of Ben’s office in without knocking and Harry grabbed the door before it slammed him in the face. Honestly.

“Louis, welcome,” Ben greeted with false cheer as he looked at them. His arms were crossed over his chest as he leaned back in his chair. He completely ignored Harry’s presence, which no one complained about really. He rather be ignored than addressed, actually. Ben was smiling at them but his eyes remained cold and unwelcoming. Louis didn’t even bother with the reluctant pleasantries or smiles, keeping his face politely blank as he crossed his arms over his chest as well. Harry took his place a few steps behind Louis, acting as his shadow while wanting to drown himself in the resulting tension that was filling up the room. “To what do I owe this pleasure today?”

“Well Mr. Winston like I’ve said a thousand times, it’s still Mr. Tomlinson to you,” Louis said in a practised steady voice even as his shoulders stiffened and hands balled into fists by his side. Harry did not have a good view of his face, but he knew that Louis was grimacing by the back of his head. Well, like that and due to the fact that the glass window beside them was partially reflective, showing Louis’ grimacing face. Harry still didn’t know why his presence was required since he wasn’t supposed to speak or interrupt them. It might be that Louis brought him along to dilute the icy temperature... as if that would help. “But that's not the point here. Do you remember how I had been telling you to get to Frank and secure the Ellen book deal?”

Ben rolled his eyes, (unprofessionally Harry might add) and absently scratched his beard. “See I tell you this every time but it's impossible for me to get to Frank, he’s a busy man. And secondly, it’s impossible for me to get them to switch publishing houses with us.”

“Well then you can guess whom I just got off the phone with?” Louis rather stated with fake cheer before letting out a fake, mocking laugh. He had guessed Louis’ purpose the moment he had asked Ben that question which the latter had clearly not. But still he didn’t have to be so uncivil about it, Harry thought and gritted his teeth. Ben was an annoying asshole, yes but sometimes, Louis prompted him to act like one as well. Someone had to be the mature one and Harry always found himself to be that person. It irked him to be level-headed but he still was since he believed that kindness did wonders to rude people and changed them. But then again, Harry’s kindness hadn’t thawed Louis’ cold heart so there was that. Also, Harry wanted to throttle Louis. “That’s right, Winston, I got to Frank and I got him to agree. Sure it took a little convincing but we have a deal, just the signing remains which will happen by next week. But I guess you never tried, or did you?” He paused dramatically and walked closer, placing his palms on Ben’s desk and leaned closer to him. Harry mentally face palmed. “Never could do the extra work, could you? Never had the talent to rise up the ranks either. Am I right?”

Ben rose to his full height, face stormy as he towered over Louis. To be honest, almost any man could tower over Louis since he was just average heighted. But it never stopped him from doing anything. Harry cleared his throat pointedly to remind them that they were still in their workplace and had to keep it down. It was not his job, Harry thought as he watched Louis’ shoulders hunch slightly as he took a step back. The tension was still running high.

Ben gave him a wary glance before glaring at Louis, almost sneering. “I’m sorry, _Mr. Tomlinson_ that I have a life. I’m not married to my job and I do have a wife and daughter to spend time with, unlike you. I don’t have the time to grovel and persuade people to sign a book deal with us. And maybe, just maybe I was the one to work my way up the ranks rather than you, who just got promoted due to a stroke of luck.”

“How is that any relevant?” Louis hissed, voice rising in volume as he crossed his arms over his chest. Harry knew that it was partially Louis’ fault but then, what could he do. He just knew that Ben’s windows didn’t have blinds on them so anyone could glance and peek in. And right now, almost everyone on the floor was looking in as they waited for a fight to break out. It wasn’t an unusual occurrence even though Ben and Louis rarely spoke to each other directly. It was apparent that Ben was after Louis’ job and thought that he deserved it more while Louis just hated him. Their co-workers were giving Harry questioning looks, wanting to know more and it just made him uncomfortable. He cleared his throat again in warning, effectively cutting off whatever Louis was about to say. (He guessed it wasn’t something pleasant.) Louis took another step back and Harry sighed in relief since Louis had heeded to his warning. “You know what, Mr. Winston, this is a professional environment. And since I’m a professional person and see you’re straying into an inappropriate territory, I’m going to cut you off right there and cut to the chase. If you don’t give this job your all, then it would give me a chance to fire you. Believe me, I won’t let go of that one. I have been waiting for an opportunity for years so better keep on your toes. Do we understand each other?”

Ben took in a deep breath and closed his eyes before nodding. Harry was holding in his breath as well since he didn’t want to jinx anything right now that they had contained their rage. He had not been looking forward to grab his boss around the waist and drag him out if things got worse. Again. It had been humiliating the past two times. “I will remember that, Mr. Tomlinson.”

“Great, that’s all I wanted to hear,” Louis said in a levelled, smug voice. He had succeeded in pulling one over Winston so his posture deflated and the venom left his voice. Harry finally let out the breath he was holding in as he nodded politely at a seething Ben before quickly following Louis out the door. He kept his head high and didn’t take his gaze off Louis’ back since he could feel everyone’s questioning stare on his skin. They were just that nosy and Harry did not want to give them much content, even though Ben was sure to talk it out later. He sighed when he was finally in Louis’ office, at ease now that he wasn’t being looked at. He was getting really tired of the stares and wasn’t looking forward to being crowded at lunch as they demanded details from him. “Well Harold, that went well.”

Yeah that had improved Louis’ mood, which was why he was back to addressing Harry by his name. When he looked at him, he found Louis smiling back smugly and his eyes twinkled like they did after every successful argument/meeting they had. When he wasn’t frowning, he looked ten years younger and more radiant. It made him look less of a robot and more of a human. But right now, Harry wasn’t affected positively by it.

“Yeah,” Harry agreed robotically, clasping his hands behind his back as he eyed the closed door. “So do you have something to tell me or should I leave?”

Louis laughed quietly, to Harry’s surprise and not in a mocking way. He was in a really good mood today, Harry thought as he stared at him in puzzlement. But why? “Why are you always in a hurry to leave? Do you have something to do right now?”

“Do I have anything to do?”

“Not really, no,” Louis replied with a smile, eyebrows rising with his words. Yup it was certain that Louis was in his rare, merry moods. It might have been the extra sugar that added the sweetness to his face or it was making Ben look like a fool. Louis brushed a strand of hair from his forehead that had escaped his quiff while the other kept watching with narrowed eyes. He was so bloody unpredictable. There was a reason Harry held his distance from Louis and that was due to his unpredictability. He would be certain to lose his shit and talk back to him in the office and Louis would not like that. Harry didn’t let himself get used to these rare spurts of happiness and the crinkly eyes. “Don’t be so skittish around me. I’m not going to yell at you. You’ve helped me a lot yesterday and I’m not always the devil, you know.”

“Yeah,” Harry agreed, huffing out a short, nervous laugh. It explained why he was being so nice. He wanted to contradict the ‘little devil’ comment. Of course.

“You don’t –” he started, eyebrows drawing together before being interrupted by the ring of the phone on his desk. Louis blinked at it in confusion before picked it up, shooting an apologetic look at Harry. “Yes? Oh James it’s you! Yeah I do have free time right now, about an hour before a meeting. But can’t we... all right. We’ll be there.”

Harry’s eyebrows shot up as he clasped his hands behind his back, knowing they were back to business. He waited patiently for further instruction. Meanwhile Louis brushed the imaginary lint off his suit as he stood up, pursing his lips before nodding at Harry and taking off in a quick flurry. Harry sighed, knowing that this brush off was to be expected and followed Louis out the door like a quiet shadow. The man couldn’t talk and explain things like a normal person, no. He has to run off and explain Harry everything right before they had to enter a room.

When the two of them exited the room, the chatter immediately died out as everyone’s eyes followed them as they walked past them. Louis merely lifted his chin and ignored them and kept walking while Harry shot everyone smiles before sliding into the elevator. It was empty apart from them and the older man leaned against the wall and whistled rather than give an explanation. Harry stared at him expectantly while wondering why he seemed so out of character in the past few minutes. Had the overheard Harry’s conversation really affected that much or... well, Harry would never know. He ran his fingers through his hair and focused on the door. Louis spoke nothing, yet Harry had deduced that they were headed to Mr. Corden’s office. Harry never had a proper conversation with the man but he did know Mr. Corden was a short, plump English man and the publisher of Colden Books. He seemed to be friendly with Louis, as if the two of them knew each other from a long time. And Harry could contend to this. Rumours were that Corden helped Louis get so further and get the executive editor in chief post. It could be true, which explained the friendliness but it also could be due to both of them being British which... uh. Who knew what was the truth actually, except for the two of them.

Louis walked swiftly past James’ assistant and knocked on the door to Mr. Corden’s office. And since Harry wasn’t a dick, he smiled as he passed her. It cost nothing to smile at people and yet.

“James!” Louis greeted jovially with a genuine smile as he pushed in the door. He held it open until Harry walked in, once again making him wonder what was up with him.

The suited man behind the desk grinned as he stood up. “Ah Louis, my lad. Come in, sit. Oh and I see Harry has come along as well? You know it wasn’t really necessary or about business.”

Harry smiled politely at him and waved, knowing he wasn’t needed. He glanced at Louis, asking him if he should leave but Louis’ eyes said stay so he did, taking his position a few steps behind Louis. He felt like a lanky, uncoordinated bodyguard on most days. Honestly, what even was his job? He just felt as if Louis asked him to tail him rather than do any actual work. It was awkward and frustrating, especially since Louis never appreciated him and refused to promote him. Harry wanted to do work in the field he studied for. Maybe Gemma was right, maybe he should start looking for jobs in other publishing houses.

“See Louis, lad, I would love to have a chat with you and catch up but I’m afraid this isn’t one of those talks,” he said as soon as he had sat back down. He pressed his palms together in front of him, his face taking an unnaturally grim look. Harry suspected Louis’ did too and he mirrored the mood. “Do you remember two weeks ago when you were insistent about going to Frankfurt Book Festival? Remember how I advised to sit out this one since your visa renewal process was going on?”

“Oh yeah I do remember that,” Louis said with an accompanying chuckle as he shifted uneasily in his chair. Harry remembered it clearly as well because Louis had taken Harry along with him to Frankfurt to stand alongside him and do absolutely nothing. There wasn’t much work for him, since Louis told him to stroll around if he wanted to. He spent a good week in Germany, if he didn’t count the resultant jetlag. (He didn’t.) “I told you we shouldn’t let go of such a great opportunity for representation. I told that to Harry too when he protested. I got about five prospective authors and –”

“Louis,” James said a little loudly, making Louis stop talking. Harry frowned as he took an involuntary step closer to listen. James’ lips were pressed in a thin line and he looked pained as he sighed. Something told Harry it wasn’t good news. “Your visa application got denied. I just got a call from your officer. I’m sorry, Louis.”

Harry couldn’t help it when he gasped softly. It was noticed since that was the moment Louis exclaimed loudly. “What? That can’t be!”

“Well Louis, I would love it if it was a rumour but it’s true.” Harry frowned intently at the back of Louis’ head. James made a sympathetic sound as he reached across the desk as if to grab Louis’ hand but drew back quickly. Louis’ fingers were fidgeting and he looked intently at them, uncharacteristically quiet. “You have two more weeks of stay here. You can pack up in that time and finished up with your clients. After that you will have to leave the country.”

“But I,” Louis mumbled, fingers reaching out to tousle his hair before he drew them back. Harry felt the strangest need to confront him as he could feel the distress radiate off him. He clenched his hands into fists to stop himself from doing something like hugging him. No that would be wrong. Surely he didn’t like working for the man but it still upset him. Deep down, buried under all that resentment and lies was the attachment that he had to Louis. He was a hard working guy and never did he think he would be deported due to his workaholic behaviour. It was strangely upsetting. “I can file for another application right? To stay?”

“You can, but it would take up to a year to be granted, Louis. Again, I’m sorry I can’t be much of help to you this time.”

“But – but you can’t do that, James.” Louis pushed back his chair, making a scraping sound as he stood up. His shoulders were hunched due to stress and James looked apologetic as he explained that his hands were tied. “Okay okay. Alright let’s see. I can work from London as well no problem. I can pull all nighters and nothing that a few Skype conferences and emails won’t help right? I can still –”

“No Louis, you don’t understand,” James interrupted him once again, cutting off Louis’ ramble which Harry was pretty sure would get more embarrassing. He never thought he would see the day when Louis would be stuttering and losing his footing. He thought it would be a pleasurable thing but it just looked sad really, despite everything. Harry was feeling bad for the guy, just a little bit but it was his stubbornness and arrogance that had brought him down. He had advised Louis not to go but he had just brushed off his advice and told him book a room anyway. Oh well. “If you’re deported then you can’t work for an American company. I’m sorry.”

“Oh. Then who will be the editor in chief?”

“Mr. Winston would be,” James said slowly and Louis threw his head back in a groan. James winced and Harry did too.

“But that guy has half arsed his entire life. How will he do a good job and bring in new clients and... How.”

“He has the most experience in this place right now.” His face looked pained, probably agreeing with Louis on Ben being bad news. “Unless you find a way to stay, I don’t think I have any other option. Do you?”

Louis turned around to exchange a worried glance with Harry and the latter immediately schooled his face into something less pitying. Louis’ eyes were searching his face intensely with his left eyebrow raised slightly as he blinked slower than usual. Harry knew he was brainstorming since that was the expression his face took and Harry raised his eyebrows questioningly. He wasn’t proud of it but he had mastered the art of nonverbal conversation with Louis, after spending way too much time with him. Okay who was he kidding, he was proud of it. But each time he bragged about it to Gemma, she would laugh and say he needed a break from Louis. He groaned and agreed with her usually.

Louis’ eyes brightened a little as he stood up and Harry knew he had a plan he was expecting him to go with. Logic and preceding experience had taught him that this would not turn out great, but well, he did work for Louis so he had no other option. “James, I actually do have an option.” He cleared his throat, looking hesitant. “I didn’t want to tell you before since well, it could be called unethical.”

James’ eyebrows rose warily as he leaned forward. “You can tell me anything Louis, you know that.”

Somewhere in Harry’s heart, some treacherous thing called hope told him that Louis was about to recommend him for the post. It was difficult to say and unethical for him, after all. But his mind was telling to stop reaching for the sky and also that it wouldn’t benefit Louis. Yet, he took a step closer to Louis involuntarily, giving the reins to his heart as his lips twitched into a small smile.

“I know but,” Louis started, looking at James before glancing at Harry. He sighed heavily, eyes closing for a few seconds before he looked at Harry again and his eyes were glinting. Uh oh. “I was planning to keep it under wraps for a while but here we go.” Harry’s smile turned into a frown as he watched Louis draw closer and loop his arm around Harry’s waist to pull him closer. He stumbled into Louis’ side, clutching to the latter’s waist to balance himself. Louis was grinning brightly at James and it was making Harry anxious. And confused. Did he mention that he was confused about the day before? Well he was, since now because Louis was actively touching him. “We’re engaged.”

“What?” James asked at the same time that Harry did. Harry widened his eyes as he kept staring at his boss while James had started to smile. Logic had never betrayed him but Louis sure had. Because what? What was happening? Was he still asleep? “You and... Harry”

Louis was nodding while Harry gaped at his side profile. Or rather his head, since Louis was a few inches shorter and was currently resting his head against Harry’s shoulder. Harry belatedly realised that they had their arms wrapped around each other’s waist and were leaning into one another, a picture of a couple. This was making him so uncomfortable – the situation not Louis because somehow it felt natural... which made him anxious. He was feeling too many things at once and whenever he felt that way, it made him descend into a muddled state of existence. Like a fog taking over. Louis squeezed his hip harshly to silence him and remind him to not say a word. As if he was going to. “Yeah I proposed to him two weeks ago, in Frankfurt. That's why it was so important for us to go, you know because I had it all planned.”

Harry kept blinking at him while trying to process the whole situation and his own take on it. Louis was talking at his usual pace, just a hint of nerves kicking in his voice. He could hear James’ laughter although it was a little distant. He was amazed at how easy it was for Louis to mould their business trip, which was spent mostly apart, into something romantic. But also, there was a loop of ‘what the fuck’ going on in his head. Louis’ fingers dug into his hip, making him flinch as he turned to look at James and tried not to grimace too much.

“I knew there was something here!” James exclaimed finally and clasped his hands, a big grin on his face. It helped shake Harry a little out of his daze. “I was always wondering why Louis took you everywhere since I know he’s not a people’s person but that explains it. It also explains why Harry is wearing that baggy sweater instead of his colourful shirts. You’ve given him that, haven’t you, Louis?”

“What?” Harry and Louis chorused in surprise before looking at each other in bewilderment. Now Harry had two major, pressing questions. Firstly, what was Louis doing and seconds, what did James mean? Did the sweater have a ‘Louis’ monogrammed on it that gave him away since he hadn’t seen anything. Or was it Louis’ usual style? Although, Louis liked Gucci more than Burberry, just like Harry did. He also had a third, louder part of him that wondered if this was a dream. He wanted to pinch himself discreetly but Louis had his hands trapped and also it would draw attention to him so.

“You’re not as subtle as you think, Louis,” James teased and the grim look from earlier had washed away completely. He was back to laughing good-naturedly while Louis’ fingers kept digging in. Harry was trying his hardest not to flinch and squirm and hop away from his confusing boss. “The two of you have become a package deal of sorts, not one without the other and it’s a dead giveaway. Young love, I guess. Don’t looked panicked Louis, it’s all fine.”

“Not panicked,” Louis said levelly but when Harry looked at him, the furrow of his eyebrows said otherwise. He met Harry’s eyes and a strange look passed over him, vanishing before it could be decoded.

“See I know that generally boss employee relationships are forbidden and unethical but what the hell it’s my damn company right?”  He winked and Louis chuckled half heartedly, his fingers going slack. “Plus you’re my good friend slash prized employee. I can always tell them that you’re vital, which you are. So it’s forgiven.”

“That easy?” Harry blurted, the carefree nature of James’ statement taking him by surprise. His voice was still barely above a whisper but it was a wonder he could speak at all, despite everything. “Isn’t it illegal too?”

“He just told us it’s forgiven, honey,” Louis said in a soft but pointed voice, pinching Harry at the last word. He was smiling his practised smile while looking at him, eyebrows raised.

Louis was a good actor as Harry had come to know. He had the ability to fool anyone, convince anyone and persuade anyone to do anything. If he wanted to, that is. He had a great poker face, a well-practised smile and an even better control over his voice. It worked on anyone... except for Harry. After having seen every shift of his expression and tone, knowing how his real smiles looked like... he knew better than to trust. So no, he wasn’t fooled by Louis’ smile. He could see right through the man, could see the panic nestled in the blue of his eyes and how his fingers were tapping restlessly against his hip. That goddamn tune too, which irritated him a lot. He nudged him with his hip, making Louis stop the tapping. “It’s alright, baby,” he added, voice like honey. “We can be more open about what we are now. And we can act like fiancés in love, which we are. No need to worry anymore.”

“We don’t have to worry huh?” Harry asked, feeling his brain finally catch up with what was happening as he raised his eyebrows sardonically. It was weird that he was taking it so well, but looking back he realised it was due to the shock of it all. Harry acted very calm when in shock, before he had a meltdown. Louis’ gaze glided over him swiftly as if signalling him to get over it and end the conversation there.

“Just make sure that you head down to the immigration office as soon as you can, alright?” James reminded them, making them look towards the man and nod in unison. Harry still found it strange how easily James had been convinced of their romantic affiliation, since he shouldn’t be. He had even rightly guessed that the sweater was given by Louis. And do they look like a couple? Harry tried his best to look professional but do they look romantic? Was it because he had thought Louis was hot in the first week? No certainly no one would know about that. Yet, Harry was close to having a minor anxiety attack over everything and Louis, as if sensing it, began rubbing circles on his back. “Remember Louis, you have only two weeks. So make it legal quickly so you don’t get deported.”

“I’ll be sure to remind my assistant to schedule our appointment,” Louis joked and laughed. Harry tried to give him another smile (keyword tried) and James nodded solemnly even as his eyes twinkled. “So we’ll be leaving now, alright? Work to do and all that.”

Without waiting for a reply Louis steered Harry towards the door with his arm still wrapped around him. He opened the door, this time allowing Harry to head out first and followed, sliding down his hand so that it rested against the small of Harry’s back. James’ assistant, whose name he couldn’t remember for the life of him, was staring at them curiously. Harry tried his best to ignore and not look back. Louis let his hand drop only when they were inside the elevator, on the opposite sides too and the door closed. It was loud enough to jolt Harry out of his daze.

“What the fuck?” he exclaimed loudly, startling Louis and himself. The man visibly flinched and looked at him worriedly, his eyes assessing him but not speaking. Harry looked at him with wide imploring eyes. “What the actual fuck happened in there!”

“I had to save my job somehow, Styles,” Louis replied, his voice high pitched and frustrated. He suddenly seemed frantic, blue eyes wide and wild as he threw his hands up in the air. A strand of hair fell out of his quiff and curled over his forehead which Louis didn’t bother brush off. “Didn’t you hear what James was saying in there? I was going to get deported.”

“So you decided to tell him we’re engaged?” Harry asked slowly, raising his eyebrows. “We don’t even like each other. We can’t be engaged.”

And as he said those words he was hit with the extent of what Louis had exactly implied. They had to pretend to be engaged and then marry for the sake of Louis’ green card. It meant that they had to act like a couple in office and... He let out a small squeak when the doors opened suddenly. He looked outside with panicked eyes, knowing for sure that everyone was aware of exactly what had transpired in James’ office. He picked up the excited chatter of new gossip but silence fell quickly over the floor as soon as they realised just who had arrived. Harry pressed his lips together as he followed Louis out as per usual, keeping his eyes strictly on the back of Louis’ head. He could see curious eyes following him as well as the knowing glances being thrown at them. Some winked and smirked and he realised they actually knew. Information and gossip travelled quickly in the building. It was something he knew before. But it was just now that he realised how quick since each and every person was looking at them, knowingly. Suddenly the distance between the elevator and Louis’ office felt too long. But worst of all, Ben Winston was out of his office today and leering at them. Oh fuck no.

“Well well well,” he said, looking absolutely delighted when Louis faltered in his step. Harry could feel the multiple pairs of eyes lingering on him, noticing his lilac sweater and arriving to the conclusion that it was a gift from Louis, just like James had. Or something. Maybe they weren’t guessing at all. Still Harry pulled his jacket securely around himself, feeling self-consciously and hoping the floor would swallow him up. Why had Louis stopped? And more importantly, why was Harry quiet instead of screaming? “I suspected something was up when I saw that oversized jumper on him before. And rumour carried that it was not what he was wearing to work today and was seen carrying it out of your office. I should have known, Tomlinson that you would be the type to sleep with the people you work with. Oh wait, I already knew.”

Harry absently reached to clutch Louis’ arm to stop him from advancing, feeling everyone’s gaze shift to where their arms touched. He didn’t move away, since Louis had told him to stop him before he punched Ben someday. Today was that day and it didn’t matter what everyone was thinking about it all. So he reasoned that this was part of his job hence he had to.

“Mind your language, Winston,” Louis bristled as he took a step closer to Harry. His arm escaped Harry’s grasp only to rest around his waist effortlessly. Ben’s eyes darted down and his smirk deepened. Harry could almost feel the entire floor holding their breath as they waited for the next move. They were a bunch of gossips and Harry and Louis provided a lot of it every day somehow. And today’s was the biggest and shocking news of them all, since their stoic boss was hooking up with his nice, humane assistant. Or something. They surely hadn’t gotten the whole news, just a little something from James’ assistant on what she had seen. He didn’t know if it was better or worse this way. Honestly Harry wanted to announce that he was quitting then and there but he was feeling drained and didn’t want to move or speak. He leaned into Louis’ touch without meaning to, heart jumping when Louis leaned back. “This is a highly inappropriate conversation you’re trying to initiate right now. We are at work.”

Ben scoffed. “It’s rich coming from you, Louis? Please. You’re the one sleeping with your assistant for god knows how long so don’t even go there. For two years you’ve been telling me to back away from him and I think now that you were just trying to keep him for yourself.”

Harry snapped his head towards Louis in surprise, eyes wide. He wasn’t aware that Louis had specifically told Winston to back off. He always assumed Ben backed away by himself due to Louis’ menacing glares. Also, Harry voluntarily chose to ignore the rest of Ben’s implication. He was watching Louis, watching the agitation creeping on to his features, eyes darkening as he clenched his jaw. As Harry had expected, when he spoke next his voice was dangerously low and cold.

“I can’t believe you’re dumb enough to tell the entire office that you were planning to cheat on your wife.” Ben’s smirk dropped quickly and looking panicked as he took a step back. As he should. Harry could hear the quiet murmurs but he couldn’t be bothered by them. “And I told you to back off because you’re a creep and what ten years older? And did I mention you’re married? Oh well.” Harry snorted in spite of himself, eliciting a small smile from Louis which vanished just as quick. “Also Winston, for your information we’re actually engaged, not just sleeping together or whatever idea you have in your head. I actually like him, as a person.”

The murmurs turned louder and there were a few loud gasps as well. Ben’s jaw was slack, eyes wide and he went completely silent. Harry could feel the smugness radiate off Louis as his fingers tapped on Harry’s back. A different pattern this time, maybe the happy one. And well, he was surprised by Louis. He was a great liar, especially on that last sentence. “So if you’ll excuse us, we have better things to do that don’t involve looking at your sour face. Good day.”

Saying so, once again, Louis led him towards him office with his arm wrapped protectively around Harry’s waist. He knocked his shoulder with Ben on the way, taming his smirk until they were in. The shutting of the door behind them started Harry out of his daze and he watched Louis walk to his chair and sit down, at ease. The silence in the room was deafening for Harry, but not for the other man who was now casually reading. Harry could almost hear the laughter outside, could feel them pointing fingers and making fun of him. Usually Harry was in their midst, sharing a little and laughing a lot about ‘the little devil’ and his antics. It wasn’t so fun when he was on the opposite side of the door (literally) and knew they were gossiping about him. His reputation would be tarnished too, which was shockingly, an afterthought.

Okay so he was back to hating one man.

“So Mr. Tomlinson,” he called, being louder than usual and slightly sarcastic. Louis looked up slowly, eyebrows raised and looking surprised by Harry’s tone. Harry crossed his arms over his chest and cocked his hip. “I think we need to have a little talk.”

“What do you want to talk about, Harry?” he asked, looking resigned as if Harry was the one being difficult. The mood swings, he swore. Harry tapped his foot in response, purposely letting the silence stretch between them until Louis would give in. And he did. “Is this about Winston? Don’t mind his words, love. He’s a douche and hates me for being better at my job that he is. You know that. God knows he was looking for  something on me for ages and he’s bound to take it too far, since it’s his only chance. I’ll tell him to back off again, don’t worry. Won’t let anyone talk shit about you or tarnish your reputation or anything.”

“That’s not what we should talk about but I’m fairly certain it’s already ruined.” He rolled his eyes as he pushed his fingers through his hair, gathering himself. “I know you’re my boss but you bloody need to talk to me before making any big decisions, _especially_ if it involves me. I work for you, yes but only for what I get paid. I can’t get engaged to you, or marry you for pretence. And don’t make that face. I know I can get fired but I don’t care anymore. Plus, Louis, we do talk casually after work, remember? But after three years of working for you all the time, being stuck at this job which involves following you around like a shadow, I’m pissed. Engaged? Really?”

“What did you want me to do, then?” he hissed, leaning forward in his chair. His eyebrows were drawn together and his tone was not calm anymore. Harry frowned, not saying a word and watching as Louis got more frustrated, rubbing the back of his neck. It did nothing but make Harry more agitated with the situation. Gemma would be proud of him right now, honestly, for protesting. Even if it was too late. “I put six years in this company, have being living in this country for over ten years now. It’s my only home but they’re about to deport me! To a country that holds no one anymore. Not to mention, but I’ll have to leave an incredible job that I love. I made this publication house into what it is and they were about to remove me. I panicked, alright?”

Harry pursed his lips, refusing to give in to the man. Louis was still the man who yelled at him two years ago for accidentally spilling drinks on him. When he was the one to startle Harry and they were out of the country for some book festival.

“Alright,” Louis huffed, rolling his eyes. His posture changed as he leaned back, face steeling. “But in my defence, I’m helping you out here as well.”

“Pray tell me how, Louis. How are you helping me out?”

“Um let’s see.” He tapped his chin, eyebrows raised sardonically. He cleared his throat, shifting back into his icy, calm demeanour once he realised pleading wouldn’t help. Harry wasn’t scared, he told himself, as he waited. “If I get deported and lose my job then, as you heard, Ben takes over. You know the first thing he’d do? Fire you. That's right. So all those extra unpaid shifts and spilled coffee orders and scheduling you did for me? Completely in vain. The past three years of your life go down the drain. So you’ll be jobless, friendless and alone. Because even I know you don’t have friends anymore. So what will you do next? Huh?”

“No,” Harry muttered under his breath, paling at the thought of it. Louis was right about that. His deportation would lead to Harry’s efforts being in vain and he’ll have to start all over, climbing the ladders slowly in another publication house he doesn’t know. That would be terrible but it couldn’t get worse than this right? Oh god that was his only reassurance since years and look at where he was! “But why should we announce our fake engagement to everyone in the office? It means we’ll have to pretend to be a couple and oh no, get married too. I can’t possibly get married to... you.”

“Hey I’m a perfect catch,” Louis protested, looking affronted as he clutched his chest. His lips formed into a perfect ‘o’ of surprise, actually looking offended. This was why Harry called him a skilled actor. Louis’ fingers reached up to touch his hair but lowered them quickly when he realised he’d ruin the quiff. If he was being honest, Harry liked it better when his hair was soft and without product. Not that he’d say it out loud. “Don’t deny. You saw I had to shut Ben, for both our sakes. Also, it’s not as if you’re dating someone or saving yourself for marriage to someone else. Right?”

“I could be,” Harry protested weakly as he pouted. Louis’ eyes were twinkling now and both of them knew Harry was fighting a losing battle there. The alternative for him would be losing his job or... well, losing his job. And he was losing it, all right. The corner of Louis’ mouth lifted in a semi smirk even if tried subduing it. “Can’t believe I have to resort to marrying my boss to keep my job. The boss I don’t even like.”

He stiffened at his confession while Louis laughed, as if he found genuine delight in the statement. Or he was laughing at Harry, and how easy it was to convince him. So, the same thing. “No one actually likes me, Harry, so don’t worry.”

It was a self-deprecating statement but Louis’ eyes were gleaming with happiness so Harry didn’t know what to say. So he didn’t speak, spinning on his heel as he headed towards the door. He mentally prepared himself for questions and a slew of jokes at his expense. This was the worst morning he ever had, no doubt.

“Harry wait,” Louis whispered softly just as he had placed his hand on the handle. Harry turned to look at him, finding him leaning back in his chair with his eyes shut. “Alright I’m aware I fucked up big time okay, but in my defence I didn’t know they’d deny my application for going due to work related purposes. Yes you warned me but I couldn’t miss it. And I completely flipped in my mind in James’ office and you were the first person I saw and thought well here’s a chance. It’s depressing to go back to a place that isn’t home anymore, to go to strangers. My accent has dampened and I’ve almost forgotten the English rains. And Lottie is here as well. I’ve put my entire life into this job and I don’t have to tell you. I’m scared of the prospect of losing it all, never to get it back.” He chuckled as he opened his eyes, looking at Harry with a strange expression. “I know I am a dick almost every day but this wasn’t my intention to make you sound like someone who sleeps with their boss. That's an awful reputation and I didn’t think of that until after.”

Harry snorted as he shook his head, smiling in spite of himself. It was the closest Louis would come to apologise and he could tell it was genuine. So maybe someday Harry could forgive him but not right now. “I guess I’ll schedule for us to drive to the immigration office tomorrow? But let me tell you, I’m not good with lies. I freak out too much so you’ll need to calm me down somehow. And one question. I’m allowed to be unfaithful to you, right?”

He whispered the last sentence on purpose, wiggling his eyebrows and it did its purpose of making Louis burst into laughter. Louis laughing was a rare sight but every time he did laugh, it was beautiful. The carefully constructed walls around him broke, the sharpness of his face turning soft as his eyes almost squinted shut. Sometimes he could see Louis’ shoulders shaking as he folded into himself and it made Harry feel proud he could make that happen. And watching him laugh made Harry feel warm inside and it almost made him forget he was supposed to hate that man. But when the corners of his eyes were crinkling, he looked a lot less intimidating. “Suppose we’ll be stuck in a loveless marriage i.e. a hetero one eh?”

Harry chuckled, shaking his head before pushing back his hair. He stepped out and his smile dropped immediately. It was like a splash of cold water as he was reminded of the fact that Louis had announced they were engaged and every person was looking at him. They were gaping, pointing at his sweater which clearly was a gift from his boss. Most of it was in Harry’s head but apprehension was crawling up his neck as he avoided looking at anyone. He sunk down into his chair and dropped his head into his hands and sighed. Well this is fucked up.

This will die down soon, he told himself. He hoped, rather. It would be talked about for at most a week he guessed. A week spent with no added benefits but a little addition of stress. Maybe he needed to march back in and renegotiate his terms. He needed to ask for compensation in the form of an increase. Better yet, promotion. But he didn’t know how to initiate that conversation.

Louis called him in later in the day to tell him to cancel the meeting. Harry was relieved for that since he wasn’t sure how to act around Louis anymore. He didn’t have a chance to process his feelings hence he kept them buried under a lot of rubble. He went about the rest of his day trying to ignore how blatantly everyone was staring and talking about him. He was cornered at lunch though, right before he was to slip away. He had been a little lost in thoughts, unfortunately, when Jesy snapped her fingers in front of his face and grinned.

“I didn’t take you as sly,” she teased and winked. Harry frowned, finding all of his friendliest co-workers standing beside her with matching smirks. “But congratulations.”

“For what?” he asked, pulling on the hem of his sweater self-consciously. He had taken off his jacket an hour ago, feeling a little too hot under his collar. According to Louis’ instruction he would have to change out of it during lunch, which was now. But he didn’t want to. So he wouldn’t.

“On your engagement, duh,” she continued, laughing as if Harry had said the silliest thing. Oh right. Engagement to the boss whom everyone disliked. But they did seem rather excited about the prospect for some reason. He tried not to grimace at them. “I can’t wait to see you wearing your ring, since I’m assuming he proposed? I bet it’s a big rock. You have to wear the ring tomorrow, please.”

It was rude of her to assume Louis would propose but well, not entirely off base there. Louis had proposed... the idea. “Yeah.”

“I didn’t take him for the type to be able to love,” Darren whispered, wiggling his eyebrows conspiringly before looking at Louis’ office and sighing. Harry gave him a wry smile as everyone burst into loud laughter. But honestly, Harry thought the same. “But I do get the appeal of him. I mean British accent, sharp cheekbones, tight ass... he’s very hot, isn’t he?”

“Oi you’re talking to his fiancé,” Jesy reprimanded before winking at Harry again. He tried to smile. “Don’t be that crude. And I hope Harry you wouldn’t rat us out.”

“Never,” he answered even if he probably might. And had already done that a few times randomly in an attempt to start a conversation with Louis. A bad attempt, really.

“He looks like an angel,” someone was saying as Harry was trying to zone out of the whole thing. He couldn’t deal with them really. He, himself, was still processing the fake engagement thing and they hadn’t even discussed anything. Sure he could probably get out of giving details by saying Louis hadn’t allowed him to, blaming it on him but he didn’t know how long. He mentally planned to schedule in ‘the talk’ with him, preferably in the next two days. “But he’s probably a devil under the sheets. Am I right, Styles?”

Harry half-heartedly joined in the laugh that followed but wanted to die on the inside. He didn’t want to imagine Louis under the sheets, if he wanted to meet his eyes, that is. He could imagine Louis was rather fit since he went to the gym regularly and he was good on the eyes as well. There was no doubt a time he fantasised about his boss but that was long, long ago and he rather not visit that. It would get uncomfortable to think about him sexually when they would be in physical contact over the next year, possibly. So he zoned out when someone said they’d have to mind their words around the fiancé or he might tattle. He wanted to be left alone. And not think about Louis and the whole crisis he brought upon Harry.

Harry couldn’t wait for the weekend, to get away from everyone and relax. But sadly, it was still Monday today and he wouldn’t get any peace.

He retracted his statement from earlier in the morning. Turns out, his day could get worse.

***

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Haha if you don't know how much I hate Ben, this should tell you.  
> Also, I don't know if there are office cubicles anymore but I liked the idea of Louis leaning on the wall and hence I kept it.


	2. Chapter 2

Harry laid eagle spread on his tiny bed, phone clutched to his ear and listening to his sister’s tinny laughter on the other end.

The rest of the hours passed painfully slow, reminding him of just how terrible it would be henceforth. The staring hadn’t stopped but it had dwindled as the hours went by. They did stare expectantly when Harry headed towards Louis’ office. They acted as if he would be so blatant while going in to ask for a blowjob or something. As if. Louis had merely told him to forget everything and focus on preparing the document file for tomorrow and researching on the forms that would be needed. Reading on it made him wary of what he was getting into, especially when he saw the punishment for immigration fraud. He closed out of the page before he could read all of it, but there was certainly a lot at stake if they were to be caught. He hoped they wouldn’t be. Harry kept his head ducked and swallowed his rising panic as he printed out the required papers, hoping no one was still staring at him. He sorted all the papers in one file and marched towards Louis’ office with his head held high. He walked in bravely, without knocking on the door first. He was Louis’ pretend fiancé after all so he had the rights, he reasoned and Louis didn’t complain either.

Louis gave him the briefest of smiles as he flipped through the pages before telling him he could leave early. It would be a sweet gesture if not for everything that Louis had put him through today.

“Remember Harry, you’re going to have a few difficult days ahead,” Louis said in the softest of voice, actually looking apologetic. Harry paused, waiting for more. “Be prepared alright?”

Harry nodded once before spinning on his heel and walking out. He barely suppressed his urge to roll his eyes as he packed his things. Without meeting anyone’s eyes or giving them smiles like he always did, Harry left the building. Once he was out, he took a deep breath in, falling in step with the strangers of New York. These people didn’t gawk at him and neither did they know he was supposed to be sleeping with his boss. Yet.

“Are you quite finished?” Harry deadpanned, knowing it was a something Louis used quite often. Gemma didn’t know that, so she couldn’t tease and eventually, stopped her laughter. It took her only five minutes, really.

“Only you could get in a situation like this, baby brother,” she said, having been quiet during the entire conversation as Harry had explained. He had been meek since he expected her to yell at him, telling him to quit or sue or something on those lines. So when she started laughing, he flinched before running out of patience while she ran out of breath. “How did you even agree to this? Okay leave that, what are you getting in return?”

“He, well he made some good points. And I get to keep my job in return.”

“That’s a lousy deal.” She laughed again and he grunted. He knew, alright. “I’ve told you so many times that you should just quit that place. Robin will help you find something else, you know it. But no, you men have big egos.”

“I do not!”

“Okay I forgot that your lame ass likes him,” Gemma teased, making Harry gasp in mock offense. He did not like that man. Nope. Maybe he should have gone ahead with that ego thing, seemed like the better option. “No don’t object. If that's not true then you wouldn’t have agreed to marry him even if pretend. I mean come on Haz, you’re the ever romantic. Or at least you used to be a while back. Your idea of marriage is traditional, showering love and adoration with big, romantic gestures. I know you didn’t even protest much to him, because deep down you like him. Tell me I’m wrong.”

“You’re wrong,” he said, making her chuckle. He really did not like him! At all. He was actually a despicable human who would use their helpless assistant to save his ass. Yup, that's what he was. “I just agreed because I didn’t want that little devil to get the satisfaction of getting me to finally quit. I won’t give up!”

“You came up with the term ‘little devil’, didn’t you?” she asked, but he had a feeling she was set in her belief.

“How is that relevant? But yes.”

“I’m just saying he wouldn’t fire you,” she insisted and Harry frowned, wrapping his arms around himself. The sweater was really soft and he couldn’t bear to part with it. How did Louis manage to find something so soft and warm and unlike him? “And that you like him, even if it is as admiration.”

Harry decided to swallow his protests, knowing it would be of no use. Once Gemma thinks of something, she fixates on it. “I’ve begun to think people don’t have boundaries anymore. Even the people I didn’t know were congratulating me, as if the fact that I’m engaged to my boss is a very happy news. Isn’t it unethical?”

“It is,” Gemma agreed, knowing Harry was changing the topic. “And illegal to get married just for a green card.”

“Worst of all were my colleagues,” he continued, ignoring the latter part of his statement and frowned at the ceiling. Again, he knew all right. “They needed so many details from me, and mainly about my sex life. Who tops, who bottoms. Oh and they assumed Louis bottoms. As if. He seems like the guy who will dominate me in bed, in my personal opinion. I’ve never seen him give in to something.”

“Yeah you don’t have boundaries as well,” she squawked and Harry laughed.

“But really, Gems! He is such a top! Okay okay I’ll stop now.” He laughed when Gemma went ‘lalala’ to drown out his words. “But you know what, from tomorrow on I’m going to be sarcastic with him. I will deny him things when he’s being unreasonable. Or I’ll try to. I’ll do that just to prove to you that I can stand up to him.”

“I don’t doubt you.”

“Good. You shouldn’t.” Gemma hummed on the other end and they settled into easy silence. Harry closed his eyes, limbs feeling heavy. “I need to sleep now, had a rough day. So I’ll call you tomorrow, but not at ten. I have to drive Louis to the immigration office.” He scoffed at it, shaking his head the best he could while lying down. “That man can’t do one thing without me. He says he can’t drive the wrong way but he drives to work every day so he’s a big fat liar. Can you believe it?”

“That he can’t do a single thing without you? I can.” Harry huffed. “Don’t be so grumpy. He’s your work husband I understand.” She laughed since now the statement was true, of sorts. “But eat something before you sleep.”

Harry hummed before they exchanged goodbyes. He fell asleep in a few minutes, with his phone clutched in his fingers. He didn't get up to eat anything before but he sure did wake up a few hours later to his stomach grumbling. He poured himself some cereal and ate it before going back to sleep.

***

Early next day, Harry went about with his morning schedule. He washed his hair thoroughly before leaving it a damn, unruly mess over his head and put on one of his plain, black suits today. Plain, mono-coloured suits were reserved for serious occasions and this might just be one. He wanted people to take him seriously. But it was a shame that he couldn’t wear his coloured suits there to get people to like him.

They were headed to the immigration office that day to fill out a form that would grant Louis ninety more days of stay until they got married. At least that's what the internet said. Never did Harry think that he would groan out loud at the thought of marriage but here he was, groaning as he reflected on Gemma’s words. He stared at his reflection, wondering if he should quit instead of going along to Louis’ plan. He wouldn’t be a fraudster that way but Louis would be deported. The thought immediately brought a frown to his face. So did he really like Louis? Was the feeling buried under distrust, annoyance, resentment and deeper under admiration? No that would be preposterous. Or would it?

Harry cut off his train of thoughts there and was thankful to the ding of his toaster. He hurriedly ate breakfast, swept his hair off his face and swung his bag over his shoulder before he was out the door. He had not been granted freedom from the nine am coffee so Harry had to take a detour on the way to Louis’ apartment. It was a good ten minutes away from Louis’ place and he wasted a few more minutes standing in the queue. He thanked Jeannie as he picked up his order, asking for a cup holder this time before carrying it carefully to the waiting taxi.

He sipped his coffee while keeping his eyes closed on the rest of the journey over to Louis’ apartment. He picked up where he had left the stream of thought, wondering if he did really like Louis. Hence he was a little lost in his head as he made his way up to Louis’ apartment and rang the bell at nine am sharp. He took in a deep breath and shook his head literally as he stared at the door.

It took Louis a few seconds to open the door and Harry grinned at him. Louis barely acknowledged his presence as he went back in. He had his phone pressed to his ears as he riffled through something on the coffee table. Harry leaned against the doorframe and watched Louis while sipping on his coffee and pretending it was wine. Louis was wearing a seemingly new suit, since Harry had never seen this maroon suit in his closet before. Louis always wore grey, blue or black suits – something blasé coloured that contrasted to Harry’s bright taste. He was also wearing a pair of thick rimming glasses over his nose, something he only ever wore in the comforts of his home. And while they were in hotel rooms. There were only two people who did know Louis wore glasses, the other being his sister, Lottie. And okay maybe Gemma knew as well since he had told her long back, when he was taken by surprise. Louis hadn’t explicitly said but Harry was forbidden from revealing that piece of information to anyone else.

Right now, seeing Louis wear glasses along with a maroon suit was making him feel a certain way. Mostly since it was a new thing. It might be the fake engagement talking but Louis looked hot as fuck in this outfit. Not that Harry would ever admit it out and especially not to his sister.

Harry gave Louis the correct cup of coffee, who grabbed it quickly while offering him the document file. Their fingers brushed slightly and their eyes met for the briefest of glances and everything felt still. Harry’s stomach swooped as the moment broke while Louis didn’t break his conversation with, who he could assume, was their current client. He just nodded at him in acknowledgment and Harry took a step back and let him pass. Louis took off towards the elevator, laughing hollowly at something while beckoning his assistant with the crook of his finger. Harry shook his head, resigned to this treatment as he mutely followed him while finishing the last of his coffee and tucking the file under his arm.

Louis’ conversation didn’t end until they were ten minutes on the road. He was sitting in the backseat while Harry felt like a chauffeur, driving him around. He ended the call with another humourless laughter than died as soon as he cut the call. Harry avoided looking at him through the rear view mirror but when he did glance, he found Louis looking back. There was an unfamiliar expression on his face, eyes duller than usual but also narrowed.

“How do I look in this suit?” he asked, pulling lightly on his suit jacket as he bit his lip. Harry frowned as he glanced at him again, puzzled at being directly addressed and that too for a casual matter. Louis was particular about his outfits, keeping them sharp and immaculately. He was more obsessed about suits than Harry was, which was a feat. “We’re going for this important business thing and I don’t look... gaudy, do I?”

Harry let out an accidental snort as he diverted his attention back to the road. It seemed like they were going to be stuck in this traffic for a while now, so sadly, he would have to look at Louis through the mirror. The man had gone quiet as he awaited Harry’s response and the latter, for some reason, remembered Gemma’s words. “You’re asking if your maroon suit looks too gaudy to a man who constantly wears bright pink ones. I will say no there. But you do look nice and suave and maroon-y. Oh and as usual, cold.”

“You’re funny,” he intoned, both of them knowing he meant the exact opposite. He was quiet for a few minutes and Harry was glad when the traffic cleared. “Remind me to put my contacts in before we go to work. I have them in my pocket, was about to put them in when the doorbell rang. I forgot I was wearing my glasses until we were already in the car.”

“Sure thing,” Harry chirped, giving him a sugary sweet smile through the mirror before frowning at the road ahead. He drove in relative silence that had turned comfortable after years of drowning in it. Louis had already picked up his phone to scroll through it again while Harry hummed under his breath as he checked the route to their destination. He parked the car in an empty spot he had found close to the building, luckily and waited after he killed the engine. The man in the backseat seemed unaware that they had stopped as he busy with his phone. After five minutes, Harry’s patience ran out. He rolled his eyes as he glanced at the man behind him before clearing his throat loudly. “We’re here, Mr. Tomlinson.”

Louis looked up in surprise, blue eyes wide with worry as he met Harry’s eyes through the mirror. There was a hint of panic that crossed his face, colouring his features before he collected himself and nodded. He pocketed his phone, not saying another word as he got out of the car. Harry sighed, noticing how he hadn’t taken his glasses off yet. So he instinctively reached for the glove compartment which held Louis’ empty sunglasses case. Along with the case and files, Harry got out. He handed Louis the case, who smiled as he accepted it and returned it back with his glasses in. Harry returned the smile while he was screaming on the inside, being so close the immigration office now. Louis took the file from Harry, holding it with both hands as he marched towards the building without looking back. Harry stared after him for a good minute, feeling frozen due to the creeping dread. The severity of what they were about to do was hitting him and Louis was no help, which he hadn’t expected him to be. He took in a deep, calming breath before robotically following the other man’s path through the crowded pavement.

“The queue is so damn long,” was the first thing that Louis said to him after they had gotten out of the car. His arms were folded across his chest as he assessed everyone else with narrowed eyes, his chin lifted in a show of arrogance. Harry looked around them and indeed, there were a lot of people in today. The queue consisted of at least ten people standing while a few more occupied the chairs. There was a lot of noise around them, various languages being spoken and Harry felt completely out of his depth there. So instead of focusing on that, he listened to the sound of Louis’ fingers tapping against the file. The usually annoying tune was the only familiar sound, grounding him somehow. It was also the only indication of Louis being scared shitless out of his mind and it was reassuring. Harry glided his gaze back to him, about to reply something along the lines of how it might be a busy day but Louis had moved ahead. In fact, he had taken off towards the queue, not to join but to surpass it. Harry let out a curse under his breath as he took long strides to catch up with his superior, who apparently had no respect for queues. Weren’t British people experts at queuing? It was something he had randomly found a while back, but Louis was not British enough for that it seemed. He was barely sparing the outraged people a glance and ignored Harry too, when he caught up.

“We can’t just cut in, Louis,” he hissed, hunching his shoulders self-consciously in an effort to shield himself from the angry glares and curses. He was pretty bad at legal stuff or immigration stuff, for that matter but he was pretty sure that you weren’t supposed to ignore the queue anywhere. He was about to grab Louis’ shoulder to pull him back when the clerk called out for the next person and he slipped literally out of Harry’s grasp to butt in. He grinned cheerily at the angry lady behind him who protested and ignored the others who rained curses at him. Harry hid his face behind his hands, not even bothering giving them smiles since no matter what he did, he couldn’t lighten the tension in the room. Why him, he wondered not for the first time. Why did he always end up in such situations due to his boss?

“It will only take a minute,” Louis told them in a cold, slightly raised voice before leaning on the front desk. He slid the document file over to the clerk, who was looking at them in distrust but accepted it nevertheless. Harry tried to ignore the glares aimed at his back as he shuffled closer to Louis, being comforted by his familiar, spicy scent. It was making him just a little heady but he tried to focus on the man ahead of him, not beside. The guy was flipping swiftly through the documents, forehead creasing as he glanced back up at Louis, who smiled back. “I need you to fill the fiancé immigration visa please. And if you could hurry that would be just great, thank you.”

“So you’re Tomlinson, huh?” the clerk asked, eyebrows raised. Harry’s eyes narrowed instinctively at the man’s tone, knowing something wasn’t right. He had a bad feeling about this, making his heart pick up its pace.

Louis, though, seemed unaffected by it as he merely shifted his weight to the other foot but kept smiling. “Yes. I am Louis Tomlinson.”

The man nodded to himself as he shut the file and stood up abruptly. He wasn’t smiling as he nodded his head to his right. “Alright then come with me, Mr. Tomlinson. Please follow me.”

“Sure,” Louis said before taking off after him without a look back. For pretending to be engaged, Louis was still as uncaring as ever. Harry hurried after him, trying to ignore the words the people gave him as he tripped over his feet.

They were led into a small room, with glass door and glass windows that showed the office floor. The two of them were left alone for ten minutes, sitting in an empty office on two creaky chairs. It belonged to a certain Mr. Gilbertson, as the nameplate said, who was their immigration officer. He was to arrive ‘shortly’, as they were informed. The desk was void of personal things but there were stacks of files and drawers around him. Harry had begun to (figuratively) sweat in an air-conditioned room and that told everyone everything they needed to know, honestly.

“I have a bad feeling about this,” he muttered for the second time in the room and Louis chuckled beside him.

“Oh do relax, love,” he murmured. His accent had gone incredibly British today, Harry had noticed. The man barely spared him a glance. “It’s not going to be that bad.”

“Easy for you to say,” he retorted as he carded his fingers through his hair and groaned softy. The only reason why Harry wasn’t openly freaking out was because people outside the office would have a direct view of him.

Louis looked a picture of ease at the moment, sitting up straight in his slightly wobbly chair. He was scrolling through and typing on his phone, with his glasses perched up his nose again. His legs were crossed at the ankle and he looked effortlessly casual and carefree, yet looked in completely control of everything. Harry wished he looked like that, since he knew he was the complete opposite of that. He felt like – and was looking like – a mess. He was slouched low in his seat with his legs crossed over his knee and one of them was jiggling incessantly. His hair was tousled from the multiple times that he had run his fingers through it in an attempt to pull it out and his cheeks were red from slapping himself twice before as he told himself to calm down. He was losing it right now, due to Louis. The three years of stress filled with coffee drives and late night meetings hadn’t managed to but this waiting had cracked him. It might be due to the fact that this wasn’t working for, but working with Louis and against the US government. Trapped in an uncomfortable room with only his boss for company and the knowledge that they were committing a federal crime... it was a recipe for Harry’s mental breakdown.

Harry’s decision to not dwell on the punishment for fraud might not be the best thing. Since now that he thought about it, maybe the knowledge would have prepared him rather than worry him. He would have known just what he was walking into here. Louis, as usual, was being no help in calming down. And it seemed like he was whistling under his breath too, although off tune.

Harry was tempted to ask Louis if he was really sure about this, hand lifted up and moving towards him. But then the door opened suddenly, and Harry’s head snapped towards the entering man and drew back his hand. The man was middle aged and balding, giving the two of them a tight smile as sat down on the chair behind the desk. Harry could assume he was Mr. Gilbertson, the immigration officer, who had finally arrived. He didn’t look particularly threatening, with crow’s feet around his eyes and big ears. But since Harry knew he was committing an offense, everyone looked threatening to him. He straightened his posture, uncrossing his legs and noticed from the corner of his eyes how Louis had barely looked from his phone. Mr. Gilbertson cleared his throat as Harry kicked Louis’ leg, making his eyes snap up and narrow at the latter. He looked back at the elder man, giving him his business-like, polite smile as he simultaneously reached for Harry’s hand to dig his nails in his skin, in retaliation. Harry swallowed down his surprise and pain, entwining their fingers and smiling politely and professionally at Mr. Gilbertson.

“Sorry for the delay,” the man said, fiddling with his tie as his eyes darted between the two of them. He reached to tap the nameplate as he kept eye contact with Louis, face impassive. “So I’m Mr. Gilbertson. And I’m assuming you’re Louis and you’re Harry. Correct?”

Louis’ eyes assessed him for a few seconds before his tilted his head to a side, smile widening as he nodded. He then looked at Harry, his blue eyes scheming as he instructed him not to speak and it was one of those conversations. Harry didn’t even try to fight him, as he looked at Louis and nodded. “That’s right. And I can’t express how much we appreciate you seeing us on such short notice.”

Harry nodded along, pursing his lips as he looked away from Louis’ face and smiling at the man who was looking between them with slight suspicion. His foot began tapping, the sound light but audible in the room and Louis immediately moved their joined hands to clamp down on his knee. The older man ignored them both, picking up the document file in front of him and flipping through it. He hummed to himself occasionally, eyes lingering on a few pages a little longer before nodding. Harry felt just a little relieved that Mr. Gilbertson wasn’t suspecting them just yet. But of course, Harry should be forbidden from thinking, since as soon as he thought something like that, things would only go south.

“So as of now I have one question for the two of you,” Mr. Gilbertson started, shutting the file as he entwined his fingers and rested them on the desk. Harry squared his shoulders self consciously while Louis’ nails began digging further into his skin. His face retained the calm and collected composure but that's not how he felt inside, Harry knew. Mr. Gilbertson was looking directly at Harry now, his eyebrows rising and Harry’s heartbeat quickened immediately. Oh no. “Are the two of you committing any sort of fraud to avoid Mr. Tomlinson’s deportation and let him keep his position as editor in chief of Colden Books?”

There was a few seconds of terse silence, where Harry regretted his mind for being right in his suspicions and wondering what exactly about them gave it away. Louis’ grip had tightened further, lips turned into a surprised ‘o’ of stunned silence before he slipped right back in his business face. He laughed tensely, shaking his head but not looking manic. “I don’t know what you are talking about, sir.”

The older man was still staring at Harry as if expecting him to break and give in, spilling that they were indeed lying about the nature of their relationship. As if he was that easy. Harry was a lot of things but disloyal was not one of them... unfortunately. He also wasn’t the one to break under stress and that was a result of being around his boss. Louis would know. So despite his heart that was ready to burst out of his chest and feet ready to take flight, he was still smiling as he shook his head with the slightest hesitance. “No. That's ridiculous. Why would we be doing... that? Right Lou?”

“Yeah where do you get that from anyway?” Louis asked, as he glanced at Harry. For a moment there, even Harry was fooled by the look Louis was aiming at him. His eyes were a soft shade of blue as he gave him a private, almost fond smile. It was a look he had only seen Louis aim at a bunch of puppies that one time and at small kids at airports. Harry was holding his breath, feeling confused and overwhelmed by that very look and he kept staring even after Louis had looked away. Was Louis... Harry blinked twice and let go of his breath as he looked at the immigration officer again. The man was looking between them curiously, lips pressed in a thin line as he leaned forward.

“We had an anonymous phone tip yesterday, that the two of you should be expected any day. It was a man named...”

“Would it be Ben Winston, by any chance?” Louis cut in as he leaned forward and clenched his jaw. Harry nervously glanced at him again, squeezing his hand in an effort to calm Louis down. It worked, as Louis took in a short breath and leaned back but his eyes looked icy again. Of course that Ben would, Harry thought. He wanted to scream right now but knew that it wasn’t the appropriate venue for that.

“Yes that was his name,” Mr. Gilbertson said, eyes narrowing slightly as he ran his fingers over his bald head. Harry was relatively calm as he watched the exchange with caution. He could feel waves of irritation emit from the man beside him as his other hand twitched around the phone he still clutched. He knew that Louis was close to calling Winston so he could yell at him, so it was up to Harry to calm him down. Harry’s fingers were digging into his thigh as he held down his leg when it tried to jiggle. He had a feeling that the man seated on the opposite side of the desk understood body language and was currently assessing them over it. He could also probably sense Harry’s fear, which was why his eyes kept flitting towards him with an unreadable expression in them.

Louis snorted, slipping out of his business mode as he shook his head and snorted again. “Oh no, don’t mind that guy. He’s just a disgruntled junior of mine, who thinks everyone is scheming just because he’s scheming as well. If I were you, I wouldn’t trust a word he says. He’s just jealous of us, of my success and of the fact that I am engaged to Harry while he failed at impressing him. That’s all. So not to be rude, but we’d like to get out of your hair as soon as we possibly can and be on our way. Sir.”

“Alright,” Mr. Gilbertson said as he raised his eyebrows at them and leaned back in his chair. He was still looking between the two of them, eyes suddenly flitting down to notice that they were holding hands just then. He hummed to himself, pinching the bridge of his nose before sighing. “Fair enough, I think. So let me explain the process that’s about to unfold here. There will be a scheduled interview that will take place, where I put the two of you in separate rooms. I will ask you all the questions a real, authentic couple would know. And you better get all of them right. Understood?”

Harry nodded, rubbing underneath his nose as he sneaked a look at Louis. The latter looked a picture of serenity again, with a small but polite smile on his face as he nodded to the officer’s words. Harry looked back at the man, who had taken a short pause mostly for emphasis and analysing their reactions. He was still looking at him as if he expected Harry to back out. So Harry furrowed his eyebrows in a show of determination as he nodded surely, like Louis was. He could pass his tests and in fact, excel at it. Working with Louis for the past three years had helped him gain a lot of unnecessary information about the man and finally there would be a test that he would excel at. He was sure he was the one to know Louis best, apart from his sister of course. So he won that one.

“Then I go beyond that,” Mr. Gilbertson continued in a grave tone as he looked pointedly at Harry. Louis squeezed his hand reassuringly as if sensing Harry’s hesitation and fear. “I dig deeper. I go through your phone record, question your neighbours and co-workers. I talk to your family members. And if your answers don’t match up all the way through, then I make sure to get _you_ deported indefinitely.” He looked at Louis challengingly, with a smile that said that there was nothing more he would love. Harry needed to learn a few tricks from Louis, since the man didn’t looked affected at all while he held Harry’s hand so tight his fingers might break. Harry subtly placed his other hand on top of Louis’ to gently pry his fingers off before he screamed. He stilled when Mr. Gilbertson directed his gaze to him. “And you, young man, will have committed a felony, a crime punishable with two hundred and fifty thousand dollars and earned a stay of five year... in federal prison. But you don’t have to worry about that if you’re an actual couple.”

Harry blanched at his words anyway, staring blankly at the man who was rubbing his hands together and looking slyly at the two of them. He looked vaguely smug while Louis looked vaguely terrified and Harry was... fine. It was possible that the excess anxiety had numbed his actual feelings towards the topic. He was feeling just a little heady due to hearing what entailed if they were caught, which hopefully they weren’t. He hadn’t thought that Ben would rat them away like that. Louis was certain to find a way to fire him soon once he secured his job and this time, Harry wouldn’t stop him. But he didn’t want to go to prison either. He found himself staring at Louis’ profile, checking him for their next move and waiting for him to look back. Louis looked back about ten seconds later and they launched into one of their nonverbal conversations, where Harry reprimanded Louis while the latter pleaded him to comply. It was not one of their usual conversations, which went the other way round but then this wasn’t a normal situation either.

“So Harry,” Mr. Gilbertson said, interrupting their stare. Harry widened his eyes and raised his eyebrows politely as he looked back at the man. “Is there anything you would like to say to me? You don’t have to fear him, it’s all right. You can say anything you want.”

Louis squeezed his hand again to be reassuring, but this time it failed to reassure him. It made him feel rather annoyed of Louis, this whole situation he had pulled him in. Maybe Gemma was right and he should let go of his ego but then, maybe not. His boss was being supportive of him, was at Harry’s mercy so maybe there was something they could negotiate so that he could benefit from it too. His lips tugged upwards and he felt a sudden burst of courage, fuelled by his annoyance and the pent up frustration of three years. He glanced at Louis again, finding him smiling encouragingly but it was all an act. Louis would go back to ignoring Harry soon and treating him like a shadow. This attention he was showering right now was due to an ulterior, selfish motive. Harry found his one chance to elevate his position. So he went for it.

“Harry?”

Harry shook his head slowly, letting his eyes slid back to Mr. Gilbertson’s face. He took in a deep breath, reviewing the words he would say. “I guess I could say, Mr. Gilbertson that Louis and I, we’re just... we’re two people who weren’t supposed to fall in love but we did. And some people are just... jealous of us. And are trying to destroy our happiness.”

Louis’ thumb was now rubbing circles on the back of Harry’s hand, still trying to be reassuring.

Harry genuinely smiled, scratching absently on his trousers. “And we thought that it wouldn’t be appropriate to announce that we’re, you know, together before my upcoming promotion.”

Louis’ finger stopped moving and Harry turned to give him a saccharine smile. Louis’ face looked generally collected but his eyebrows were raised high on his forehead in surprise while his lips were parted. Harry knew all those micro-expressions and seeing that Louis had been thrown off by him made him feel happy inside.

“Promotion?” Louis asked, tilting his head slightly to a side.

Harry lifted their joined hands to place a gentle kiss on the back of Louis’ hand, grinning at the soft gasp the latter let out. Whoever said Harry was shit at acting was wrong. So basically, Harry was wrong. He looked back at the officer, dimming the smugness of his smile just a little. Being a rebel felt good, he thought, especially when he was the one reaping benefits. “It would make everyone think that I’m promoted to an editor just because I’m sleeping with the boss and he was favouring me and all. You know.”

Harry purposely didn’t look at Louis even if he was tempted to. Mr. Gilbertson nodded as if understanding their situation, rubbing his chin. “I see. So have either of you told your family about your relationship? Parents maybe?”

Louis pulled his hand out of Harry’s grip and fiddled with his tie. “No, uh I can’t since my parents are dead.” He let out a short burst of humourless laughter and Harry frowned at him. He knew how much that topic affected him but didn’t reach out. “I do have one younger sister but I haven’t told her yet. Haven’t had time to talk to each other due to our busy jobs.”

“Jobs, huh,” Mr. Gilbertson echoed before scoffing. “And what about you, Harry? Are your parents dead too?”

“No they’re very much alive,” Louis replied for him, leaving Harry staring at him with parted lips. Clearly, he didn’t want Harry to veer them off-track again. He carded his fingers through his hair before looking back the officer, who surprisingly didn’t look as suspicious as he had when he had entered. Or was doing a better job of hiding it. “In fact, we’re going to be telling them this weekend. It’s Gammy’s ninetieth birthday and everyone would be gathered there. We’re going to take the moment to announce our engagement, which Gammy will act upset about since she’s dramatic that we’re taking her day but she’ll love the surprise. I haven’t met her yet, but I know Gammy is a vivacious one from Harry’s stories. So yeah.”

“Is that right?” Harry whispered and teased, his eyebrows raised in surprise. He knew Louis had rambled away there but he was also, clearly showing off his knowledge about Harry. He was proven right when the blue-eyed man gave him a smug grin, eyes twinkling with hidden mischief. Harry was taken aback of course, since he had led himself to believe that Louis hardly listened to anything he said that didn’t consist of work. But maybe Louis did remember Harry’s phone conversation and was utilising it for their benefit. It was clever, he had to admit and seemed genuine. “So we’re not doing work as you had told me we’d do?”

“I wanted to surprise you, love,” Louis whispered, soft enough to be seemed as private but loud enough to be heard by the third person. He was leaning in closer, his eyes soft and crinkling with his smile. Harry was left confused by his words, which did seem a lot more genuine than his usual business-like tone. Was he being honest or was he trying to one up on their lie? No one knew. “We deserve a vacation and you deserve some family time.”

“So where does your family live, Harry?” Mr. Gilbertson asked, interrupting them and laughed. He was smiling at them, the suspicion completely wiped off and why did everything have to be so confusing. Harry was blinking at him for a few minutes after leaning away from Louis, confounded by his sentence.

“Sitka,” Louis answered for him again, looking earnest as he checked in with Harry before looking ahead again. “He’s from Sitka and that's where his family is. Alaska.”

“Alaska, yeah,” Harry repeated mindlessly as he wondered just how much Louis knew about him. It certainly might be that Louis had gone through his employee information to seem more of a partner than a superior. He knew Louis loved doing research, even if he did dump most of it on Harry because he could.

“So you’ll be going to Alaska this weekend?”

Harry nodded, beating Louis to answer this time. “Announcing it to the family this weekend. At my parents’ house.”

“We’ve covered that, honey,” Louis said, laughing lightly.

“Okay,” Mr. Gilbertson said, making them look towards him again. He picked up a pen, scribbling down on one of the post it type things on his desk. “Anyway. So this is how it’s going to go. I’ll see you two at eleven o'clock Monday morning for your scheduled interview and your answers better match up.”

His words lacked his earlier scepticism as he offered the note and Harry took it, smiling at the man politely. Louis had already stood up and was typing something into his phone. Harry sighed mentally when they left the office and gasped when Louis reached for his hand without looking up from his phone. It was weird walking side by side holding hands when Harry was used to running after the shorter man. Louis was distracted as they left the building and walked towards their car. His quick pace made Harry stumble multiple times and Louis stopped to let him gather himself. He let go of his hand when they were amidst the crowd and grinned at Harry.

 

“You’re pretty great at lying, Harry,” Louis exclaimed as he threw his head back in carefree laughter. It went pretty smoothly in there. Sure he had his doubts about Harry, knowing how nervous he got on a daily basis but he had held his own. He might have even gone a little too far but it was alright since the officer believed them. Louis did a better job, and was far more convincing but he had no one to brag to, except for Lottie. But she would reprimand than congratulate him so, well. Right now, a little away from the IO building, Harry was giving him a contemplating look, lips pursed. Louis tried his best to keep his face neutral, which didn’t take much effort honestly. He was used to it. “That went great.”

“ _Did_ it go great?” Harry muttered, almost to himself as he grabbed Louis’ bicep. Even if he was trying to be rough, his grip was light and Louis let himself be led further away from the building. He had a feeling that Harry was leading them towards the car but not quite, since he stopped abruptly. They were standing to a side, overlooking the busy street in the middle of the day. Courtesy of Harry, really.

“I mean he didn’t suspect us,” Louis stated, frowning at Harry. It was the only criteria that mattered. But the latter rolled his eyes and scoffed disbelievingly. He tried to ignore the strangeness of his behaviour, the unusual bite to his words which previously used to be lined with anxiety instead. Louis took a step away from him to observe him, pulling on his cuffs and slid back into his usual business demeanour since he didn’t want to linger too long. “Anyway. So here’s how it’s going to go this weekend. We’ll be flying down to Alaska on Friday morning so be sure to book our tickets early. Early means now, just book when we reach the office and use the miles, okay. Cancel all our appointments with new authors for the week; we’re not taking new projects. And cancel our appointments for Friday too, regardlessly. Remind me to pack my bags on Thursday night lest I forget. We’ll be flying down there so check us into a hotel, you’ll know best right. You’ll introduce me to your family as your boyfriend, no need to tell them we’re engaged yet. I know you’re out so wouldn’t be a problem, will it? And tomorrow we have... why are you looking at me like that? What’s wrong?”

“What’s wrong?” he repeated, voice squeaky as his eyebrows rose. Louis blinked at him, eyebrows rising in question as he crossed his arms over his chest. Harry looked away, letting out a humourless laugh as he ran his fingers through his hair. He looked frustrated, curling in on himself as he did when was trying to escape his thoughts. Louis had seen that posture before and it concerned him at the moment. “Do you really not get it?”

“Get what? Explain it to me in longer words, not meaningless sentences.”

“Were you not in the same room as me?” he whispered as he leaned in closer. His green eyes were wide and he looked frenzied. Louis reached out to placate him but remembered that it would be inappropriate, what with him being Harry’s superior. Also, Louis was the one causing him this frustration so his attempts would not be welcomed right now. He had fucked up their dynamics at start. He made sure to behave coldly with him in office and a little friendlier outside. They weren’t friends (Louis had kept it that way) and certainly not close enough that he would appreciate Louis’ touch. Harry most definitely hated him, which might be his fault but eh. Not touching and not being warm was his personal rule and he couldn’t break it now. “I’m looking at jail time here if we’re caught –”

“Big emphasis on ‘if’ –”

“Louis, it might not seem like a big fucking thing to you but I’m not keen on being a criminal alright?” Harry all but screamed, making Louis flinch back in surprise. He was surprised by the outburst, which was valid but this hardly was the best place to have this conversation. They had attracted the attention of startled passerby, who narrowed their eyes and lingered. Not that they haven’t had people staring at them on the street, the outburst was usually caused by Louis while Harry smiled at them. It was the other way around today, since Harry glared at them until they walked and his chest was heaving. The strange sight was off-putting and Louis didn’t know how to deal with it. So he cleared his throat pointedly, making Harry look back at him before his glare decreased in intensity. At that moment Louis was tempted to say that Harry would have a good time in jail but refrained from saying that since they were in public. Also Harry was pissed and it was unpredictable. Not to forget Louis was his superior and there were some boundaries that needed to be kept from his side, no matter how many times he forgot to due to their age gap. Or maybe it was Harry, who made him feel guilty when he acted like his cold self.

“It isn’t that big of a crime,” he muttered after taking a long pause, making Harry look at him with a blank, displeased look. He pursed his lips and looked away, knowing speaking more might alert someone that they were committing immigration fraud. And Mr. Gilbertson did seem to be the guy who would love to deport him.

“You know what just forget it.” Harry glanced back at him only for his lips to twist into a frown as he marched past him, towards Louis’ car. It was a strangely rebellious behaviour that stunned him into silence. It also made Louis feel guilty as he stared at Harry’s tense back before making the quick decision to stop him by grabbing on to his wrist. The younger man stopped instantly, sighing as he hunched his shoulders. He didn’t look back, making Louis sigh in return as walked around him so that they were facing each other again. After all, the intensity of his nonexistent emotions was also felt more when he was making eye contact.

“What’s bothering you exactly?” he asked after letting the silence between them last a few seconds. He dropped Harry’s wrist and pushed up his glasses as he assessed his face. Harry refused to meet his eyes and was instead frowning at the ground. “Is it the jail thing? Because trust me, no one will find out about us. I’m great at acting and making up things on spot, as you must have noticed in Mr. Gilbertson’s office back there. I wanted to be an actor at one point before I realised it was a fruitless dream. It was a long time ago so... you’re really not going to explain yourself, are you?”

Harry shrugged, smiling cockily at him. It was as if Louis’ confusion and his tactics for getting him to speak were of great amusement. He seemed pretty confident that he understood Louis well, could dodge any of Louis’ tactics and it was endearing, honestly. He was thankful for having an almost inexpressive face else he’d be smiling. But just for the record, he was smiling on the inside since he wasn’t as cold as he had made his reputation to be. He waited silently for five minutes while they stood in the corner of a busy street. Harry didn’t seem close to giving up so he huffed, crossing his arms over his chest. “You’ll need to speak up some time,” Louis said, raising his eyebrows challengingly. And then he gave up. “Fine, if you want to be like that, Styles. I’ve got you all figured out, a while back. You want something in return, right? Something more than just getting to keep your job?”

“Now you get it,” Harry exclaimed with false cheer as he clapped his hands with fake enthusiasm. Louis gave him an unimpressive look (even if his heart was feeling fluttery inside) that made Harry chortle and shake his head. “Alright so I do have three demands –”

“Of course you had them ready –”

“First of all, stop interrupting me.” Harry raised his palm for emphasis while Louis rolled his eyes, a tad bit fondly as he sighed. Harry smiled, tilting his head to a side as he raised his index finger. “My first demand is that you promote me to editor. Don’t interrupt me, Louis, you know I deserve this. I’ve helped you a lot in the past three years and I work twice as hard as what my job entails. I deserve it. Plus, we’ve already told the officer that –”

“Was part of your plan.”

“Hey!” Harry protested, stomping his foot like a toddler and Louis let out a short burst of laughter, which he covered up with a cough. Riling Harry up was fun, honestly. “Promote me.”

“I can’t just do that, Styles,” he said in a neutral tone before mentally reviewing if he could. If he tried he could convince James somehow and that could be done. But Louis didn’t want to lose such a good assistant and his kinda sorta friend.

“Then get deported, Tomlinson,” Harry said as he smiled cheekily, willing Louis to protest again. He narrowed his eyes at the younger boy, noticing as his smile widened with passing time. He loved putting Louis in a dilemma, that cheeky bastard. Louis huffed in resignation and knew he would have to agree to his whims, since he did need more help than Harry.

“I’ll see what I can do. But I can’t promise anything and I need more time.”

“That’s all I wanted to hear,” Harry sang, eyes sparkling and Louis realised he was mocking him. He was repeating exactly what Louis had said to Ben the previous morning and was being sassy like he had never before. Louis knew Harry wasn’t quiet, just bit his tongue quite often at work. But right now, seeing him not holding back, he didn’t know what to think of it. He wasn’t sure if he liked it so he pursed his lips. The younger man put up another finger as he raised his eyebrows, indicating another demand. “You need to publish my manuscript.”

“What manuscript?” Louis asked, feigning ignorance. He could see various emotions flit through Harry’s face as he took a step forward. He leaned in close until they were almost eye to eye, closer than ever before and Louis was pretty sure he was holding his breath. So maybe he knew that Harry had slipped in his own manuscript within the pile on Louis’ desk last month. He had seen him do it and had read his name on it as well. And Harry knew that he knew, so he sighed. “Alright I know about it. But it wasn’t good enough, sorry.”

“You barely read it,” Harry intoned as he took a step back. Louis took in a deep breath, breathing in the remnants of Harry’s cologne and coughing on it. Harry barely cracked a smile as he placed his hands on his hips, looking displeased. “Stop trying to fool me, Louis it won’t work.”

“It wasn’t good enough,” Louis repeated with a little bite to it, raising his chin. It made his glasses slide lower down on his nose, but he didn’t push it up because pride. “And I did read it.”

“Uh huh. So new demand. Read it again, be my editor and tell me exactly where I’ve fucked up. I’ll correct it _then_ you’ll publish. That alright?”

“I’ll think about it.”

“I want a confirmation,” Harry badgered, making Louis sigh and roll his eyes.

“Will that get you to stop annoying me? Then yes.” He checked his watch, realising they were very late. “We have a meeting in an hour, I’m sure you know. Before that I need to eat something I’m hungry. So let’s get on with it, shall we?”

Harry was looking grim as he nodded before he started smirking slowly. Louis narrowed his eyes in suspicion, taking a step back as he realised this was not going to be a good thing for him. “Until we’re ‘engaged’ or married whatever, you have to stop being ‘the boss’. It means you can’t boss me around but I can boss you. You have to be yourself, be Louis, not Mr. Tomlinson. It will be fun I promise you. You do need this job more than me.”

“No,” Louis said flatly. Harry’s smirk widened since he knew how much Louis relished control. And the sheer audacity of him to ask to give it up... he was playing with Louis. He was trying to humiliate him or take revenge or something and he couldn’t allow that. He was going to one up Harry from now on, didn’t matter that Louis couldn’t be romantic to save his life. He was going to be the best damn fiancé and make Harry regret he challenged him. “Not a chance, Styles.”

Harry grinned cockily, flicking his hair. “We’ll see.”

Louis narrowed his eyes, looking intensely at Harry’s face. It made the smile slide off his face and he looked slightly scared, which worked in Louis’ favour when he took a split second decision to lean in closer to him. He stood up on his tiptoes, whispering with his lips brushing Harry’s ears. He felt the latter freeze up against him and not in an uncomfortable way but almost overwhelmed. It was an interesting effect, making him chuckle and he heard Harry’s breath hitch. “We’ll see, Styles, we’ll see.”

When he leaned back, Harry was blinking in surprise with his lips parted. Louis’ lips curled up in a smug smile, knowing that Harry’s submissive streak could be an advantage to him.

“Okay,” Harry whispered, looking dazed before blinking quickly to snap out of it.

“So is that all?” he asked, not making an effort to curb his smirk. He was feeling amused right now and couldn’t bother to be professional even when he should be. He pushed his glasses up and tilted his head to a side. “We have deal now, right? We’re engaged?”

Harry cleared his throat and pinched the bridge of his nose as he nodded. “Yeah sure. But I’m a traditional person so you need to propose to me first. Right now.”

“Right now?”

“Right now.”

Louis looked around him pointedly, glancing at the dusty sidewalk then at his suit then up at Harry. He wasn’t looking as cocky as before but he certainly was challenging him. “Right here?”

Harry shrugged, the corner of his lips turning up. Louis raised his eyebrows at him, feeling his competitive spirit call to him as he slid down to his knee quickly, in the middle of the crowded street. Harry was gaping at him, apparently not having expected him to give in so easy but he recovered quickly. He shut his mouth, looking around at people anxiously and then back. Louis felt smugness swell up in his chest even though he wondered why the fuck he was going through with it. He cleared his throat, casting a worried look at his trousers before meeting Harry’s eyes. “Harry Styles, marry me.”

“No.”

“Are you really going to make me...”  He took in a deep breath and closed his eyes. Okay, he was not a quitter. Also, he couldn’t afford to lose his job and Harry was the one option. “Harry, ever since you stumbled into my office that day, and subsequently stumbled in life and around office, I couldn’t help but take a liking to you. You’re one of the two people who take care of me and I like you for that. Even with your clumsiness, I know I can trust you to hold my heart and keep it unbroken. So, would you do me the pleasure of marrying me? Pretty please?”

Louis was smirking up at Harry, ignoring the fact that his words came from a genuine place. That place contained a bunch of emotions he never liked to visit and now that he had, it was making him slightly vulnerable so he would like it if Harry wouldn’t take the piss again. Harry closed his mouth once again and cleared his throat, most likely to seem like he was above it all. Louis knew him too well. “Yes, I will. I don’t appreciate the stress on my shortcomings, but I’ll marry you. So I’ll meet you at your car.”

Saying so, Harry turned up his nose and walked past a kneeling Louis. The latter stared at the empty spot his assistant had been standing at before turning around to stare at his back. Harry had a spring in his step, looking pleased with himself and Louis couldn’t believe him. He wasn’t yet settled on whether or not he liked sassy Harry. Right now, he was close to no.

 

As Harry walked away, he bit his lip and focused on keeping one foot ahead of the other. He didn’t know how pissed Louis would be but it was certainly worth it, especially when he found Louis on his knee even when he had reached the car. Chuckling to himself he unlocked the door and slid in, seeing how Louis snapped out of his thoughts and stood up swiftly. As usual, he ignored the weird looks people were giving him as he dusted off his suit and marched towards him.

Harry tamed his amusement when Louis was closer, finding his disgruntled expression rather adorable. He didn’t think much about that thought afterwards, since Louis had slid in the passenger seat instead of the backseat, surprisingly. He crossed his arms over his chest, looking more of a child than a thirty year old adult and glanced over at Harry when he didn’t stop staring.

“This isn’t over,” he muttered, glaring at him before looking ahead again. That was what it took for Harry to smile to himself as he started the car. It felt strange, but nice to stand up for himself and tease Louis. Gemma would be pleased about this. But he knew that since they were headed to work finally, he couldn’t be that person. But what was the weekend for if not to annoy and tease Louis. It certainly would be fun, if he didn’t count the lying to the family part.

In his mental booklet about Louis, two more facts were added. One was that Louis was a highly competitive person along with a great liar. Also that the best way to rile him up without getting in trouble, when he placed a challenge in front of Louis. He still hadn’t gotten over the time when Louis had crowded up in his personal space and made him want to be controlled. It had been weird really and hot, but not to be thought about again.

The second thing was that Louis, being a hot and cold person, did not like it when someone acted the same with him. This would be fun.

***


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again, I've never been to Sitka so the location is entirely based off the movie.

The next two days were to say, strange. It might even be the worst two days of his life.

Actually, that wasn’t true. There was that one week where everything had gone wrong and had Harry twist his ankle by Thursday while walking to work. So no, he couldn’t call this his worst week but it was certainly the most bizarre week since he had joined Colden books and he was ready to scream by Friday.

Harry went through the days thinking that one day, looking back on this week he would get the strength to trudge through tougher times. But he was certainly lying to himself and his unnecessary optimism would only lead him so far. Of all the weeks he had worked for Louis, this was the most confusing he was being and Harry didn’t know how to deal with him, on top of everything. He didn’t assign Harry much work to do, probably thinking he was doing him a favour but that gave him too much free time. He also kept space between them, more than before and it was maddening. On top of that, his colleagues demanded details about Louis, their engagement, everything. Harry couldn’t possibly provide them anything since first of all, he didn’t want to. Secondly, lying on the spot was never Harry’s forte. And giving true details wasn’t an option. So avoiding people was his only alternative. But it seemed as if everyone who worked on the floor was vying for his attention, probably trying to get on his good side as if Harry would rat people out. As if he would do that. He didn’t have any interest in that.

But it was baffling how ‘in demand’ he had become, with everyone except for Ben (who was sulking) tried to strike a conversation with him. And then there was James, who had already invited the two of them for dinner as soon as they could. He had said his wife was excited to meet the man that made Louis happy. Harry had found himself dumbfounded before he stuttered out a response along the lines of how he would get back to them after discussing with Louis. Narrowly dodged that bullet. But it was still imminent and it was not a good thing.

Harry was in a desperate need of a vacation and Louis surely owed him one. He should have noted it in his demands, he belatedly thought and voiced to Louis the same on Thursday. But the man just laughed, saying he was basically giving him a three day vacation anyway. As if. Harry had given him the stink eye and left, hearing the quiet chuckles behind him. Honestly, Louis was being very confusing and strange.

Actually, calling this week strange might be an understatement. The week was a big mess and there was nothing that could get worse than this. (He had to change his motto, really and aim bigger.)

On Friday, Harry relished the two extra hours of sleep he got.

Their flight was at two thirty in the afternoon so he had plenty of time and had decided to reach Louis’ apartment by twelve. He would cook something light for the both of them before they left. Louis had told him to just bring something on the way and not bother too much with cooking, but Harry had stubbornly insisted on making them something. See Louis had this bad habit of skipping meals or staying in the office till late and grabbing something to eat on the way home. Hence the beautiful kitchen in his apartment was almost unused. Harry envied him for the kitchen and he would never let an opportunity to cook there go. It would be a shame. Also, it would certainly help answering the question ‘who does the cooking in their apartment’. _Definitely not Louis_.

Harry had to remind his boss to pack his bag twice last night yet there was a forty five percent chance that he had not. He always packed the last minute and not well, he must add. Harry didn’t want to come off as someone who thought about Louis all the time except... he did. He hadn’t realised just how much of his life revolved around Louis until he sat and thought about it on Wednesday while taking an impromptu late night bath. It had put him in an existential crisis.

On his way over to Louis’ place, thankfully without the coffee, Harry worried. He worried about everything he hadn’t let himself worry about before. One of things he worried about was how would he lie to his family. Harry wasn’t a good actor but he could tell a few lies if he really had faith in himself. But these were the people he knew best. Gemma already knew, which was a good thing since she certainly wouldn’t have believed it. But there was his mom and Gammy. They’d be upset if they found out he lied to them, that too for fraudulent reasons. He was convinced his mother would catch them the moment the landed in Sitka. And knowing Gemma, she would be less than helpful and she had said she would be. Harry had called his mother to let her know he was coming with someone special so she was excited. He felt hollowness in his chest, knowing she would be disappointed in him soon. He let out a harrowing sigh, regretting his life choices not for the first time.

“I like your sweater,” was the first thing that Louis said to him, holding the door open while openly smirking at him. Harry frowned at him in confusion before he looked down, realising he was wearing the lilac sweater that Louis had gifted him. His cheeks coloured automatically. It hadn’t even been a conscious decision to wear it and he was about to say so. But when he looked up, Louis was already swaggering away. Harry turned his nose up, deciding he would not apologise for loving the sweater as he shut the door behind him. He refused to apologise for liking the sweater Louis had picked. “You can sit down anywhere you like. You’ve been here before plenty of time so I will cut out the formality now.”

“You’re such a good host, Louis,” Harry deadpanned as he set down his duffle beside the sofa. It was way more comfortable when he talked to Louis on first name basis rather when he had to hold himself back and call him ‘Mr. Tomlinson’. Louis even allowed him some snark now and then, like now when he smirked at Harry and settled right in the middle of his ‘L’ shaped sofa. Any corner Harry picked would lead him to be very close to Louis so might as well, he thought, and plopped down right beside him. Louis looked at him with a surprised expression but didn’t move, started jiggling his leg which made his toe touch Harry’s knee. This was totally fine and it wasn’t as if Harry was holding his breath or anything. He wasn’t overwhelmed. It was a usual reaction to Louis. Yup.

There was nothing else to do so Harry took to staring intently at the man beside him. Louis was unnaturally fidgeting today, tenseness radiating in waves as he frowned at his phone. He repeatedly pushed the glasses up his nose before typing something into his phone and frowning more when he got a response. Harry could only guess it was his sister, since no one else stressed him out that much. Louis’ words from a few days back, not Harry’s. Randomly Louis would push up the sleeves of his oversized hoodie and sigh. His hair was messy and soft and not for the first time, Harry wanted to run his fingers through it.

He desperately wanted to ask Louis what was bothering him that much. But he knew that he wouldn’t get an answer anyway so he didn’t. It was definitely related to the deportation business. Also, if Louis got grumpy right now, Harry would have to spend the entirety of the flight with him in a foul mood. And that was never good. So after a few minutes of silence, Harry busied himself by taking out a file from his duffle. He had printed out a few sheets full of commonly asked questions in the immigration interviews and they had four days to go so they needed to be prepared. They could not fuck it up, although Harry didn’t think he would. He wasn’t so sure about Louis.

Harry pursed his lips, turning towards Louis again to find him turning his head away quickly. Was he staring at him before? Well no one would ever know. “Louis, you need to read through this with me. It will help us know each other better?”

“What is that?” he asked, trying to seem absent minded but failed. Why was he like that, Harry questioned before sighing. Louis kept up the act, eyebrows furrowing as he replied to his sister and made him wait for half a minute before he looked up, blinking at him. Without looking he threw his phone on the empty end of the sofa and Harry stared at him in disbelief and shook his head. Louis waited patiently for a reply and when he didn’t get any, he huffed, running through his hair. “I’m sorry about that. I was just... nevermind. What's in the file?”

“I printed out a list of questions that are generally asked in immigration interviews so it will help us on Monday. I compiled it after browsing through various sites. It will be useful.”

“Oh. Will it be? So we need to learn the answers to this?”

“Um you need to learn the answers to this,” Harry amended before clearing his throat. Louis looked up at him impassively before leafing through the pages again. Harry frowned at the lack of response before hurrying to explain himself. “Since I have been basically taking care of you for the past three years, I surely know the answers to everything in this file. But you’ll need to work hard to remember the answers relating to me, if we want to come off as a genuine couple.”

Louis looked at him again, but this time his eyebrows were raised as a smirk played on his lips. He was challenging Harry, plain and clear since there was competitive streak in him. “You underestimate me, my darling Harry. I might even surprise you with how much I know about you, since you might not think but I listen when you ramble. Let me indulge you still. What makes you think that you know everything there is to know about me?”

“I have been basically taking care of you for the past three years,” Harry repeated, slowly this time as if explaining to a child. Louis gave him an impassive look which made Harry unsettled and a little unsure of himself so he blinked back. Louis smirked before shaking his head and flitting through the pages before he stopped on a certain one.

“The best way to check it would be if I test you. What do I love to eat in the morning for breakfast?” Louis asked and looking at him as if expecting him to fail. He was challenging Harry again, thinking he wouldn’t know the answer. Well, he was wrong.

Harry tried not to show how smug he was by scrunching up his nose. He didn’t give the answer he’d give if they were friends (ass) and gave the right answer instead. “It’s a trick question. You don’t like breakfast or eating anything until noon.”

Louis hummed, trying to look unimpressed and hiding his surprise. Harry just grinned at him. “How do I like... okay that's easy. Where was I born?”

“Doncaster. Come on Louis, be tough.”

“This one is difficult.” Louis hummed under his breath, rubbing his chin. “’Who is your spouse’s employer?’ Who is it, Styles?”

Harry rolled his eyes while Louis smiled softly, almost fond. “Louis, come on now be serious. I don’t know how I ended up being the serious one today but we need to discuss the real questions so as to get our lies straight. Like when was our first date? Or who proposed to whom? What's our proposal story, Louis?”

“I have a great one.” Louis closed the file and rubbed his hands excitedly. He leaned in closer and without meaning to, Harry leaned in too. Louis’ eyes were sparkling and Harry was almost holding his breath. “But I can’t tell you now.”

“Why not?” Harry whined, pouting and leaning back. Louis was chuckle as he shrugged, leaning back into the sofa. “If I don’t know the proposal story then how would I know if I said yes?”

“Of course you said yes, Styles,” Louis said flippantly as he flicked his fringe to a side. “I have the best proposal idea but all will be revealed in due time.”

“There isn’t time for your dramatics,” Harry said, sighing as he ran his fingers through his hair. “But whatever. Next important question. First date? Where did you take me?”

Louis hummed, tapping his bottom lip and Harry’s eyes were drawn to them to track the motion without meaning to. His lips were very pink and inviting, parting slightly as if inviting him. Harry felt breathless at the thought of actually kissing Louis, something he never thought he’d ever do. And that reminded him that he had to broach the topic of practise kissing. If they had to sell the act for a year then they would have to perfect their kissing until it didn’t look awkward. People knew what first kisses looked right? Especially when the people kissing were hesitant and not in love. Harry certainly wasn’t looking forward to convincing Louis to kiss him, mainly because he had a feeling he would love seeing Harry beg. And also, harry had a fear that he might like kissing Louis too much and that would make the rest of the months working together as awkward. But selling it to Harry’s family was a main priority and hopefully Louis would understand and not tease. When he blinked and snapped out of his thoughts, he found Louis’ lips had drawn up into a smirk. Harry looked up at his eyes immediately, cheeks heating up at being caught. “Let’s go basic, shall we. Let’s say I took you out for dinner one night after we were working late. And you didn’t think it was a date, since I’m your superior but you were hoping for it because, well obviously. We talked about ourselves and accidentally kissed at the end of the night, no explanation as to why, before we parted ways. And oh it was one year ago so it wasn’t like a predatory thing.”

“That’s cute-ish but why are you the one to take me out?” Harry tilted his head to a side and narrowed his eyes. “Why can’t I be the one to make the first move?”

Louis raised his eyebrows before scoffing and looking away to flit through the pages. “Both of us know that you wouldn’t make the first move.”

It was kinda true. “That is so not true!”

Louis hummed, clearly not believing him before looking intently at the pages in his hand. Harry could see the corner of his lips tilted up in a smile, but it looked more of endearing than mocking. Harry got flustered due to the possibility of it, brushing his hair back. He also remembered that he had to ask Louis to kiss him, which certainly didn’t do anything to make him stop flustering. So he decided to get on with it, clearing his throat to catch Louis’ attention. The older man looked up, his smile turning a little concerned. “What happened?”

“I was um. You see like.” He took in a deep breath, making Louis’ eyebrows push together. This was it, Harry thought, this would end up badly. Maybe he shouldn’t... “ _Weshouldpractisekissing_.”

“What?” he exclaimed, more curious than disgusted while Harry was freaking out on the inside. A lot, he should add. But he said it way too quickly for a human to understand so maybe there was a chance to back out and pretend he didn’t say that. “We should practise kissing?”

Okay so Louis wasn’t human. He should have known better. Still he wasn’t looking aghast so there was a chance to withdraw the proposition. (And seriously why was aghast the first word to come to him.)

Louis just kept blinking at Harry, lips parting and closing without words coming out. He was at a loss of words, second time this week. Only this time, Harry was stumped as well. There was no backing out of this, not like there was ever an option to. But he guessed that Louis hadn’t thought out this plan that well. Harry had thought about it, in detail so he knew he had to take the next step but didn’t know how. It was Louis who broke the tensed silence, chuckling nervously before clearing his throat. “If I didn’t know you better I would think that you’re looking for an opportunity to kiss me.”

“That’s the furthest from the truth.” His voice was surprisingly level but his eyes betrayed him as they darted down to Louis’ lips and licked his lips. Louis’ lips parted as he perhaps noticed the movement and slowly, his tongue darted out to lick his lips too. He remembered Louis’ comment from earlier and how he would never take the first step. Right now it just made him want to, so he lunged forward to capture Louis’ lips, swallowing the surprised squeak the man let out. Louis’ lips were slack against his own, body frozen but he recovered quickly, hands coming to rest on Harry’s jaw. Harry shifted closer on the sofa and grabbed Louis’ neck to pull him closer and tangled his fingers in Louis’ hair. His hair was just as soft as he had imagined, silky under his fingertips and Harry just smirked before leaning back. Louis’ eyes were closed, lips parted and the slightest hint of puffy. It made his smirk die down just a little to be replaced by lust but no, not those thoughts. “I can make the first move too, you know.”

“Yeah you can,” Louis agreed, absently touching his lips without breaking eye contact. Harry was expecting it, yet he didn’t know who was the first to reconnect their lips again. But they were kissing, with more intent and less confusion. Louis’ lips were insistent against his, fingers threading through Harry’s hair. Neither of them deepened the kiss, both content to exchange close-mouthed ones. It was broken only when Harry let out a soft moan when Louis pull on his curl and both their eyes flew open together as they froze. They startled apart, putting some distance between them. Their cheeks were flushed, lips redder than before and they weren’t looking at each other. Harry’s eyes were intent on his thigh, where Louis’ hand had been and was aware of how their knees were still touching. His hand was still resting on Louis’ hip, which he drew back quickly as if burned and squeaked out a small ‘sorry’ and blushed harder. He didn’t even know if he should be sorry, mainly because he was sure Louis had moved first. Harry had just kissed Louis, although G-rated.  But Louis was his boss and they had kissed. And Harry liked it too. His head was spinning a little due to the realisation and a lot due to that kiss, which was the most action he had had in months. “I can kiss better.”

Harry was tempted to counter it by asking if he was sure before pulling Louis into another kiss but he refrained, knowing better. He just made a sign of acknowledgment as he shifted in his seat and fixed his hair. He could see Louis’ pink tinged cheeks from the corner of his eyes. “We’re good with kissing. That was enough practise I think.”

Louis cleared his throat once again, choosing not to respond properly as he picked up the file. In midst of everything, it had toppled to the floor and Harry felt slightly ashamed of that. Louis was feeling the same probably but he looked nonchalant, except for the tapping of his fingers which was a clear giveaway. “Okay so next question. ‘Whose house will we be living at after marriage?’ Well that easy, my flat obviously.”

Harry gave a loud squawk of disagreement, being loud on purpose and crossed his arms over his chest. He didn’t look at flustered anymore, which was nice. “You know how offending that is? You don’t know where I live. Maybe it is the better place for us and we move there after marriage. Also, why would we be living here anyway?”

Louis was back to his impassive self, even looking a little cocky. “I live in Central Park West, Styles and you know how posh my place is. Sure I haven’t been to your _apartment_ , but I have an inkling that it’s a studio apartment with not enough space to accommodate us both.”

“Actually not true,” Harry protested immediately, eyes darting down to Louis’ lips for a quick second. Louis looked chuffed, head tilted to the side as he waited. “It is large enough to occupy us both... barely. Alright don’t look at me like that and don’t insult my apartment. And don’t call me ‘Styles’ either. We’re supposed to be engaged, remember?” Louis nodded gravely even if his eyes sparkled with barely tamed delight. “And as far as your apartment is concerned, it barely looks habitable for a person like me. It’s too well polished and silver? I mean it’s too sharp and posh and gives a lonesome um bachelor vibes. It isn’t a um –”

“Family home?”

“Yes, family home. Also, I’ll forgive your interruption just this once.”

Louis laughed loudly, throwing his head back. It was the genuine giggly laughter, not the perfected _hahaha_ kind. It was kinda cute, to say and he looked sort of adorable right now even when he shouldn’t. His eyes were almost shut with the force of his laughter, arms wrapped around himself as his shoulders shook. There were crinkles beside his eyes, nose scrunched up and he looked like sun personified when he wasn’t actively trying to put up a glum facade. He was beautiful and Harry found himself unwillingly reflecting on that stream of thought. He wouldn’t admit his crush aloud but he couldn’t deny the existence of it. Although he just liked this version of Louis, when he was unguarded. And now that they had kissed, again, the feelings were rising. One more thing he never admitted out loud was that this wasn’t their first kiss. They had kissed twice before when extremely drunk and Louis had pretended it never happened. He was great at pretending. And Harry convinced himself it meant nothing and this was just the side effect of the kiss. He really did dislike Louis, but this was just the fake engagement talking.

“You’re right, it would be too hard to make it look as if you live here,” Louis quipped once he had calmed down and Harry had stopped staring. He stood up abruptly, stretching his arms and Harry’s eyes darted the strip of skin along his waist that was exposed. Harry was nothing but a cliché, he thought as he looked away when Louis sat back down. “I could add a few pictures of the two of us on the wall. I could throw some rainbow or bold coloured pillows on the sofa and sprinkle some glitter over everything. That's a telltale sign of you being here, Harry.”

“You get the essence of my choices!” he exclaimed, making Louis break into laughter again. This time Harry joined too. He really preferred home Louis than work Louis, since obvious reasons. He was much more than the icy demeanour and he rarely let it slip but Harry always felt curious about it. Maybe that's what attracted him and he really wished it didn’t, but Louis was fun. He almost felt like they were friends, who bantered and teased each other. Why weren’t they friends though, Harry wondered since they got along with each other outside of work. The question arose in his mind sometimes.

“So just put this file in my laptop bag, would you?” Louis said and just like that Harry realised why. Louis was the reason they weren’t friends. He always seemed to catch himself the moment they turned too casual and turned it into something professional. He got that pinched, guilty expression like the one he was sporting now before looking away. Harry tried not to frown at the whiplash as he took the file from him and looked around the room for his bag. He found the said bag propped in front of another, larger bag. He sighed as he kept the file in Louis’ laptop bag while staring at the larger bag in question. Had he actually packed? Harry looked back at Louis in question. “Thanks love. And I was just practising to act more like a boyfriend, if you wondering.”

“Okay alright.” Harry nodded as he pursed his lips and glanced at the bag again. “Have you packed your bag then?”

“Two days ago,” Louis said smugly while Harry looked at him in distrust.

“Have you really? Or did you just shove everything in and will then insist I iron everything before you wear it?”

“That happened only... four times,” Louis argued, pouting without meaning to.

“Before I took up the responsibility to pack for you. It was a year ago Louis and quite frankly, I don’t trust you.”

“Check for yourself then.” Louis crossed his knees and leaned back in his seat. “Go on.”

“I will.” Harry raised his eyebrows confidently while looking at him before unzipping the bag. The laugh that was on the tip of tongue died as soon as he saw the contents. The shirts were neatly folded and so were the trousers and two pair of jeans that were arranged in the way Harry did. It was a astonishing sight and the surprise most likely showed on his face when he turned to look at the other man again. “How?”

“I’m not that dependant on you,” Louis replied stiffly, turning his nose up as if the implication was false. It confused Harry further, who stood up and kept frowning. Louis sighed and rolled his eyes. “Oh come on I can learn, alright. I’m not a baby.”

“Sure you are,” Harry intoned, blinking at his boss. He moulded his face into something that didn’t look as baffled as he felt. Louis was biting his lip to hide his smile as he nodded. There was a beat of embarrassed silence, at least on his part. He couldn’t take it for long though so Harry made vague hand motions pointing towards the kitchen before he started to head that way. “I’m cooking for us. Something light which you’ll like.”

“Thank you, my better half.”

Louis was giving him a sugary sweet smile and Harry scowled in return as he walked quickly to the kitchen. He couldn’t help but smile when he heard quiet chuckles behind his back.

As he had promised Louis, he made a simple meal made almost entirely of salad. He received a scowl at first but no complains after. He knew what Louis liked after all, and it made his life feel a little sadder. But hey, at least he’ll pass that immigration interview with flying colours. If Louis cooperated that is, which he doubted.

They spent the next half hour systematically avoiding each other’s presence, both of them keeping their eyes on their respective phones. Louis seemed to do god knows what while Harry scrolled through instagram for a while, frowning at everyone’s busy life before texting Gemma. In the midst of his conversation, Louis got up and walked into his bedroom. Harry looked up at him momentarily because of instinct before reply to Gemma’s text. A few minutes later, Louis walked back out in the living room and Harry didn’t bother looking up until he cleared his throat. He looked up distractedly and then did a double take. An actual double take like in cartoons.

Louis’ clothes were pressed, Harry noticed. He had changed out of his soft, comfy clothes into something formal. He had hoped he’d wear something slightly informal for the plane journey since it wasn’t a business travel but no. Thankfully, it was no suit but rather a light blue button up paired with cream coloured slacks. His hair was left down and mussed but his glasses were replaced by contacts. His sharp eyes were on Harry, eyebrows arching the more he continued to stare. Harry was dumbfounded and slack jawed. What the hell?

“What’s the matter with you?” Louis asked after two minutes of silence while he rolled up the cuffs of his shirt. The action exposed his forearms and the veins on them and Harry couldn’t help when he kept staring. How was he attracted to veins? “Is something wrong with my outfit?”

“You’re wearing your work clothes,” Harry stated as he looked him up and down before his gaze settled on the frown on Louis’ face. “We’re going to my parents’ house up north and yet you’re in business clothes. Shouldn’t you be in something casual, like jeans?”

“But this is casual,” Louis protested, crossing his arms over his chest. “I’m not wearing my suit jacket, see. Plus, my shirt is blue and all my business outfits have white shirts. And these are my casual slacks.”

“They’re slacks.”

“Are we stating the obvious here?”

“Louis.”

“Harry,” Louis repeated in the same tired tone while raising both his eyebrows at him. He seemed confused by Harry’s reaction. “I have to impress your family. I can’t just show up in jeans, can I?”

“Yes, you can! I’m showing up in jeans.”

Louis rolled his eyes, pushing his fringe to a side delicately. “Oh let it go, would you? I’m comfortable in this too, don’t have to stuff my legs into skintight jeans. I don’t know how you even sit for nine hours in that, but you don’t find me saying a thing yeah? So why does this bother you?”

“It doesn’t,” Harry said slowly, eyes flitting down to fixated on Louis’ exposed, tattooed forearms. It wasn’t as if he hadn’t seen them bare before, far from it. There was just something about men rolling up their cuffs that looked hot, especially combined with the disgruntled look Louis was sporting. Harry withheld a groan as he looked away, typing his frustration in a text to Gemma. As expected, it went unanswered.

***

Louis seemed nervous and distracted on their cab drive to the airport. Harry glanced at him several times, worrying his bottom lip since the other man’s frustration was affecting him too. It might be the tapped tune giving him anxiety, probably so without thinking he grabbed Louis’ hand and flattened it across his knee. Louis looked at him in surprise and mild frustration, eyes darting from his face to their hands. And to Harry’s surprise, he flipped their hands and entwined their fingers with a determined expression before meeting his eyes. A silent understanding passed between them and Harry realised the extent of his worries. Not that he’d ever reveal but he knew Louis wanted reassurance now so he kept their hands entwined before giving him a grin. In return he got a timid smile and it was so unlike Louis that it was scary.

“Um shall we continue the questions?” Harry offered and Louis nodded slowly, hesitantly. “Alright so I’ll quiz you about something off the top of my mind. I’ll go easy. What's my full name?”

Louis scoffed as he rolled his eyes. “That’s really easy. Harry Edward Styles.”

“Correct. How many members are in my family?”

“Four – mother, stepfather, grandmother and sister. Respectively named Anne, Robin, Annie and Gemma.”

“You’re doing brilliant so far,” he exclaimed in his best impression of a talent show host. Louis laughed, shaking his head like Harry was being ridiculous. He was being ridiculous, but then he was also succeeding in his mission so. “The next question. Where did I grow up?”

“Harry!” Louis exclaimed as he burst into fits of giggles, high pitched and breathy and Harry grinned at him. “Sitka, Alaska.”

“That is great progress so far, Lou!” Harry gushed, squeezing their entwined hands. since he was mesmerised by Louis, he didn’t realise the nickname slip until a few seconds after. He was saved from further conversation since they had arrived at the airport. Neither of them mentioned the slip as they paid the cab driver and climbed out, dragging their bags behind them. Or actually, Harry was carrying both their bags while Louis strutted forward like the diva he was. Typical.

“Are we going to quiz each other again?” Louis asked when their plane had finally taken off, breaking the silence between them. Harry blinked at him owlishly while in the process of untangling his earphones, evidently surprised. Harry had tried plenty of times to initiate conversations in planes only for Louis to shut him down by pretending to be engrossed in his laptop. After being snubbed so many times, he had stopped doing it since he did have self-respect. Harry had assumed it would be the same today as well but clearly Louis had different plans. “Harry?”

Oh right he was staring at Louis. He had to answer.

“Yeah yes okay,” he replied, nodding vigorously and shoving his earphones away without looking. Louis laughed at him quietly before pulling out the document file. “Like I said before, I know almost everything about you but you’ll need to read a lot more about me, which is personal stuff, not something that could be found on my resume. Alright, so we should talk?”

Louis hummed as he ignored him, tracing the list of questions with his finger before stopping on a random one. “Harry, what are our pet names for each other? I don’t do pet names, honestly and I’m quite shit at them. Apart from the usual darling, which I mean sarcastically almost every time and love, which well, an English habit. When I look at you, I want to call you Curly or well, Frogface and that's not cute. So sweet cheeks? Dimples?”

“That’s cute,” Harry deadpanned, rolling his eyes and acting to be done with him. Inside, however, he was feeling rather endeared, noting down in his ‘Louis book’, as he had dubbed it. “It’s very odd and impersonal, Lou, you can’t call me that. I can call you Lou, because obviously and baby honey. Cute right? I give strange sugar based names, FYI so it’s normal for me. You can call me H or Haz, like my sister does.”

“We suck at this,” Louis said with a blank face as he let his head drop back with a light thud.

“No, you suck at this,” Harry protested, crossing his arms over his hand. “I, on the other hand, excel at romance. Ask any of my exes... which are two. They’ll tell you. And since we are not on the same business level, I find it uncomfortable to give you any names. I’ll find it in me, eventually. We should just move on.”

“Okay,” Louis said, shooting him an amused look as he looked at the file again. “Which side of the bed do we sleep on? It’s left for me, obvious so you’ll be...”

“Right,” Harry completed, frowning slightly. “I always sleep on the right as well, even on an empty bed.”

“Right,” Louis repeated, pursing his lips. “It’s turned out well, I suppose. Do I have any allergies? No and neither do you, I know. How did we meet? When you stumbled into my office. Who was the first one to say ‘I love you’, you obviously. Who –”

“Louis!” Harry whined, snatching away the file. “It’s supposed to be a quiz. You can’t just answer everything. No one made you the boss of this.”

“Uh actually...”

“No.” Harry narrowed his eyes at him while waggling his finger. “I told you I’m the boss of this when we’re doing this and you’re not. You need to calm down and settle into passive. Surely being so dominant would be stressful... no don’t answer that. Just loosen up alright and you listen to me... or rather answer. What’s my favourite fruit?”

Louis smirked. “Banana.”

Harry blushed while clearing his throat. “Which college did I graduate from?”

“Is that even important? It’s in your resume, and like you said, something apart from the resume.”

“Whatever you say, Louis. Let’s just talk about us, all right? Starting from your childhood.”

“I hate you,” Louis said, narrowing his eyes.

“That’s not what you said last week babe,” Harry cooed while touching Louis’ cheek gently. He had shaved this morning too and his cheek felt smooth under his skin. It was a little weird to touch Louis’ cheek but he kept his hand there because commitment. “I’ll start...”

And he launched into childhood stories while Louis listened, who knew how intently. He nodded and laughed, adding something from his side and the journey felt fun for the first time.

***

It was the first time in a while that Louis sat back and let himself feel anxious. He drummed his fingers against his thigh as the time passed by and after Harry had stopped talking and fallen asleep. His heart was feeling dread for the future and he kept his eyes closed, pretending to be asleep as he re-lived the worst moments of his life until now. He wondered if any of the decision he had made were ever right, since they had led him to this point in life. He’d never know really, would never know what would have happened if things went differently. But he gathered himself when Harry woke up and just looked at him from the corner of his eyes. Harry was currently blinking sleepily as he looked out the window and he looked so soft. The moment Harry had rested his head against Louis’ shoulder and fell asleep was the moment Louis had started freaking out. He wondered not for the first time since monday if he was taking it too far with him, asking too much of his assistant.

Louis was known to be cold around office, it was a persona he had erected thinking it was what it would take to shield himself from criticism. Sure he worked twice as hard to keep the criticisms away in the first place but people usually didn’t need failures to get talking. And the editors who sat outside his office were one of the chattiest groups, waiting to pounce on the first piece of gossip they got about Louis and he worked hard to not to give them any. Until now that is, when he publicly announced that he was getting married to his assistant whom he treated poorly. That was certainly unintentional. Just kind of happened.

Not that he’d admit but Louis had spent the past two days in deep research, brushing up on Harry’s family history to make himself seem more genuine. It hadn’t helped much but at least he came to know what kind of people they were. To his misfortune, they were the kindest, genuine people and Louis felt even more of an imposter who was tricking them. He felt terrible about himself and had logged out of Facebook and sighed then, almost calling off the whole thing. But his green card was on the line so he had no option. Besides Harry hadn’t protested a lot so he must be fine with it. Right?

Louis looked at once again Harry, sweet Harry who tolerated all of his mood swings with just a pinched smile or an eyeroll. He felt guilty for putting him through all that and anxious for how his family would react to Louis. Surely they had heard all the stories about his temper and irrational demands and hated him. He hadn’t asked Harry how much he told his family about Louis, mainly since he was afraid of the answer. So he kept listening carefully to the titbits of information about his past that Harry did share. Nothing from his words ever suggested he lamented his move from Sitka, but he also seemed to adore his hometown and family. He did imply he didn’t see them enough and Louis felt guilty about keeping him in New York most of the time.

Louis was reluctant to share details about himself and Harry was so stuck on the fact that he knew everything about him that he didn’t ask. He didn't know how Harry had gained the confidence in that admission but Louis knew for certain that there was no way he knew everything. There wasn’t much he had revealed to warrant that confidence for sure. But he did add vague bits about his life, Harry’s face lit up in excitement as if he wanted to know more. Not that Louis would tell another soul (except his sister who was in the know), but Harry kind of glowed when he was happy or excited and it was beautiful to watch. It almost made him share but then he refrained, knowing there were boundaries that existed. Or did there?

Louis took in a deep breath to quell his panic when he heard the announcement say they were landing in Juneau. He frowned, shooting Harry a confused look only to get a smile. “We’re landing in Juneau?”

“Oh I didn’t tell you?” Harry shrugged noncommittally. “We have to take another flight to Sitka. A wait of a few minutes and half an hour of journey.”

Louis let out an internal groan, cursing Harry a little since he did put him through his panic over nothing. They still had more than half hour to go! Great.

***

Louis collected himself in the bumpy journey the next plane entailed and he was looking forward to a good nap. His back and shoulder were aching, mostly from sitting still while Harry slept and he would also love a hot shower before he had to meet with Harry’s family. And speaking of them, he had yet to ask him how much they knew. But he kept delaying asking the question and before he knew it, their plane was finally landing at Sitka.

Harry gave him a small smile, squeezing the hand he was holding and Louis hadn’t even realised they were holding hands. That was strange. The stress that had been building up settled as the plane landed and he cleared his throat, eyes glinting with anxiety before he pulled the mask of calm back on and squared his shoulders. It was only when they were getting out of the plane and he saw the giant signs with Harry and Louis’ name written on it that Louis realised he had no idea how to greet family. He hadn’t met the families of the guys he was dating hence was very inexperienced in that area. He hoped Harry understood without telling and would help him out of this too, somehow.

Harry grabbed his hand again without hesitation as soon as they were on flat land and Louis would deny that his stomach flipped because of it. He seriously had to relax. He wasn’t supposed to feel emotions, especially the fluttery ones relating to crushes. Louis was suddenly being dragged excitedly by his assistant towards the three women of varying age group who had held up three, obnoxious but handmade signs and cheered at the sight of him. Harry was smiling softly as he advanced towards them and Louis felt like he was intruding on something private. Because he was intruding on something private.

“Little brother!” screamed the youngest woman as she ran towards them, with her bob of platinum hair flying behind her. Harry was quick to let go of Louis’ hand when the woman hit him with such force that he staggered a good few steps back while laughing. Louis took a step back, blinking warily at them while running his fingers through his hair nervously. He watched as the two older ladies advanced towards them, smiling at Harry and Louis felt guiltier. He was invading a private moment by forcing himself in, but he let himself worry about it for only a few seconds before smiling politely. He was being watched, after all. Gemma let go of Harry finally, gripping his shoulders as she smiling brightly. “It’s been so long, Harry.”

“It’s been what.” Harry scrunched up his face in thought, looking skyward before snapping his fingers. “We met at Christmas, right? No wait, also on my birthday when you flew to New York. So it has been more than three months.”

“A few long months yes,” Gemma agreed, laughing. Louis’ lips turned up at the sight before he schooled his face into something neutral when Gemma glanced at him. She looked back at Harry, whispering something in his ear before stepping back and turning so that she was blatantly staring at Louis. She tilted her head tilted to the side as she peered at him curiously, assessing him and smirking at her own thoughts. The previous excitement of hers had complete wiped away, replaced by something more guarded. She was sizing him up and Louis felt like he was being judged for not knowing that she had been to New York. But then, he wasn’t Harry’s real boyfriend so he wasn’t supposed to know anyway. But the weight of her stare was making him shifty and he pulled on his sleeves, unrolling them as the seconds stretched on. Finally, she extended her hand and smiled, almost too sweetly. “And here is the man who has been keeping him awake for months. Louis.”

Louis coughed into his fist, looking at Harry who looked like a deer caught in headlights. Louis looked back at Gemma and realised his lips had tilted up in a smile as well, unbeknownst to him. He shook her hand and as expected, she had a firm grip as if she was trying to intimidating him. It was working but only because he was the one in a problem and didn’t have a ground to stand on and be confident about. “The one and only. I take Harry has told you about me?”

“A little here and there yes,” she agreed, giving him an obvious onceover. Harry walked over to Louis’ side and wrapped his arm around his waist. Louis was glad for the support but also was feeling uncomfortable like this. “You’re the boyfriend, aren’t you? He tells me a lot about you.”

“Does he, now?” Louis looked up at Harry, who was pointedly looking away with flushed cheeks. “Good things I hope?”

“Something like that.” She shrugged, flipping back her hair and looking like the statement was definitely untrue. With a glance Louis asked Harry if he knew a thing to which he got a twitch of an eye in return. She knew he was his boss at least, but Louis wasn’t sure about the ‘pretend boyfriends’ part. Maybe she thought they were dating? Would explain the animosity radiating off her. “He did tell me you took him to Frankfurt recently.”

“Gemma, don’t hoard their attention now,” Harry’s mother chided but she was smiling anyway. Louis was saved from answering or reacting to Gemma’s inquiry since Anne was now close, followed by an older woman who Louis could assume was Gammy. They were grinning brightly, obviously excited that Harry was finally home as they rushed towards the man and wrapped him in a joint hug. Louis once again took a step back to give them some space. He was feeling slightly uncomfortable by the display of affection, he admitted but also, he was out of place but that was usual. He had never fit in anywhere. Gemma’s eyes were still narrowed in scrutiny and didn’t even try to be subtle about it while Louis pointedly looked away. “I’m so glad you could make it, baby. Gemma was telling me a few days ago that your workaholic boss might not allow you to leave. Her words, not mine.”

Harry cleared his throat, eyes shifting over nervously to Louis. “Um he’s not that bad. He’s dedicated to his work so he wants me there to help him. But he did give me two whole days off along with Sunday. So he’s nice, right?”

“Wouldn’t be too sure,” Gemma muttered under her breath, still eyeing Louis. Hmm yeah she hated Louis because he was the boss.

“Still it’s only three days but at least you’re here,” Gammy said as she pressed a kiss against Harry’s cheek. Her eyes flitted over to Louis and brightened. “And who do we have here? He looks too posh to have sat in the plane like that.”

“Nice to meet you, ma’am,” Louis greeted while giving her a polite smile, sure to show off his teeth. He hoped he looked less sharp and calculating than usual as he used both his hands to grab hers. He could feel Harry’s intent eyes on the side of his face, something warm in his expression and he looked away when Louis tried meeting his eyes. He wasn’t an idiot. He knew how to communicate like a normal person, even if he hadn’t been in this scenario for years. “I’m Louis Tomlinson. I’ve heard a lot about you.”

“You’re so very formal,” Gammy stated with a ‘tsk’ sound followed by a grin. She leaned in closer conspiringly and Louis mirrored it to be polite. “I didn’t know anything about you until yesterday, when I got to know from Gemma. This one doesn’t talk much about his New York life.”

“Gammy!” Harry exclaimed with a fake scandalised expression. He was an okay actor, Louis noted as he watched the man trot closer and wrap an arm around him again, effortlessly. They sort of fit like puzzle pieces, Louis thought as he leaned into the touch. If he didn’t overthink things as much as he did, he would think this was a daily occurrence. “You’ve barely met him now. Don’t go filling his mind with things.”

“Don’t worry nothing will change my opinion about you,” Louis said in what he hoped was an endearing coo of a voice. It felt strange and Harry thought the same, if the twitch of his eyebrow was anything to go by but he kept smiling. Louis patted the younger boy’s chest softly for good measure, feeling the softness of the sweater he had gifted. How he wished he had brought one for himself too. He still had time though. “I will still like you.”

It wasn’t a lie. Louis did like Harry, not that he ever showed. Harry didn’t believe him though, and his smile turned amused.

“I agree we can save the chit chat for later,” Gammy added with a wink. “Preferably while I show you Harry’s baby photos. He looked cute then, you’ll see.”

“Gammy!” Harry protested, a light blush dusting his cheeks and he looked scandalised for real. Louis couldn’t help but giggle, leaning his head lightly against Harry’s chest before drawing back to catch Gammy’s wink as she slithered back to where Gemma stood. There was a hint of a smile on Gemma’s face now, as her eyes flitted between the two boys.

“Nice to meet you, Louis,” Anne said as she gave him a warm, open smile. “I’m sorry we didn’t prepare anything special for you. This one informed us just yesterday he was bringing along ‘a special someone’. His words, not mine.”

So it was a family habit to say that phrase then. Good to know.

“Nice to meet you too, Mrs. Twist,” Louis replied with a grin and Harry chuckled in his ear. He turned his head up to give the younger boy a challenging look. Harry smiled in amusement, eyes glinting with all the words he wasn’t saying. Louis tilted his head to a side, smiling as well and Harry shrugged, chuckling. “I’ll get you for that, later.”

“What happened there?” Anne asked, looking quizzing between them while Gemma snorted. Anne turned towards her with a frown. “Did I miss something?”

“I think everyone missed something,” Gemma commented, winking at Harry and he blushed, clearing his throat. Louis was confused as to what had happened this time, looking between the siblings. It was an inside joke for sure. “But hey we need to leave. I’m missing my evening and food for this. These heels are bloody killing me, so why are we still standing?”

Evening? Louis squinted up at the sky, with the sun still high up. It seemed like noon with the sun shining directly overhead but it was cool, not sweaty like in New York. Sure Louis had researched beforehand to find that it was mostly sunny in Alaska when it was summer, but the time was difficult to tell. Was it five pm or seven? It was also floundering how anyone could get used to living in so much brightness since Louis preferred the quiet comforts of the dark. Living in a timeless day like this would be, well, uncomfortable and strange for him.

“It’s eight pm,” Harry whispered into his ear helpfully and Louis nodded. In a louder voice, he said, “Shall we ladies?”

“It’s just another twenty minutes ride home,” Anne informed Louis, smiling at him. She didn’t suspect a thing out of ordinary, like the stiffness in Louis’ shoulders accompanying Harry’s touch. It must be nice to not be so suspicious. “But the two of you must be tired and you have people to meet when you reach home.”

Louis blinked, rooting to the spot and Harry stumbled when he tried to walk. Wait, did she say home? Were they headed to Harry’s home rather than a motel first? He looked up at Harry, who was looking back in concern, head tilted to a side.

“You alright?”

“We’re headed to your house, first?”

“Ah sorry we didn’t inform you before,” Gemma cut in, not looking even a tinge of apologetic. She flipped her hair over her shoulder, giving them a sinister smile. Anne and Gammy were out of earshot, having already taken off. “I cancelled your reservation last night. Why stay in a motel when you can be with family? After all, it is Louis’ first time in Sitka. Need the best for him, don’t we?”

“Gemma!” Harry whined, stomping his foot like a petulant toddler. The movement startled Louis enough to unfreeze and step away from Harry’s hold. “It’s hard enough pretending to be dating him, why did you place us right in the middle of our meddling family!”

“Mom insisted!” she protested, crossing her arms. “And I didn’t tell you to get entangled in... this.”

“It’s not my fault.”

“You could have said no, you dummy.”

Louis sighed, rubbing his eyes before walking in the direction of the older ladies. He knew when he needed to excuse himself and he definitely should get away before he got to know what Harry actually thought of him and the whole situation. It was confirmed that Gemma was the only one who knew what was going on and did not approve of it. Why would she, since her brother’s boss who mistreated him on the daily was now manipulating him into doing an immigration fraud. The awareness just hurt him slightly but he pressed it down, knowing this was not the place to linger on it. The siblings didn’t even notice his absence, talking in hushed whispers and elaborate hand actions. Louis rolled his sleeves back up in anxiety, doubting everything for the umpteenth time in the week. Was he a bad person?

Harry joined him after a few minutes, after they had picked up their luggage and stuffed it in the trunk of their car. He was looking at Louis apologetically, lips parting to say something but the latter held up his hand to cut him off. Louis purposely sat beside the window in the backseat, content on looking out at the strange but beautiful land that stretched beside the road. Not for the first time in his life, he felt like an unwelcome stranger. He was thankful for the beautiful scenery that distracted him from his own thoughts and the animosity radiating off Harry’s sister. Anne and Gammy didn’t seem much of conversationalists either, keeping to themselves and Louis was thankful for that. He didn’t have the energy to deal with cheery conversations when he was feeling anything but.

Harry had soon realised that he was feeling down, and had clasped his hand while rubbing his thumb over Louis’ skin in circles. Louis tried not to pay attention to it but he wouldn’t deny that it was soothing in a way, even if it was coming from his assistant who hated him. Of course Harry hated him, Louis had never given a reason for him to feel otherwise. Harry and Gemma were engaged in a hushed discussion and his rumbling whisper was also helping Louis. He closed his eyes as he rested his head against the rolled up window and let himself smile, just a little.

Soon the green trees thinned, lonely road ahead turned into small houses lining the street and they were finally entering the town. Louis assumed this was where they would live, in the small, old-fashioned town. It was a cute and a nice change so there were no complaints from his side. Might as well be called a very small vacation and maybe he would enjoy. Despite living amidst Harry’s family and pretending to date him, that is.

Louis read the shop names to calm himself, catching the names of most of them. He realised a few things about the town – one was that it was quaint and two, almost every store had the name Styles-Twist before it’s specification, like grocery or bakery. Harry’s surname was Styles while his stepfather’s and mother’s current surname was Twist. It seemed like they owned the entire town, or at least the shops that it consisted. He frowned outside the window before nudging Harry and turning to face him. Harry looked back at him in concern and maybe a little annoyance as he rubbed the side of his chest as if it hurt. Louis rolled his eyes, knowing he hadn’t hit that hard.

“Why didn’t you tell me you have so many family businesses?” he hissed, making Harry frown before realisation dawned on his face.

It was Gemma that answered though. “Was probably being modest. Harry here doesn’t like to show off his assets to get jobs. You know.”

Louis in fact, did not know what she meant but nodded anyway before he looked away. The faint reflection in the mirror show his unfazed face even when he was feeling anything but at that point. Having an inexpressive face was an advantage when he was in situations where he felt conflicted or tensed. And right now, he was both. There was something deterring about Gemma, something that put him on the edge. It might be because she knew his intentions and detested him due to it. Usually Louis wouldn't be affected by that but right now he was. He wouldn't fault her for hating him since he would feel the same if it was concerning his little sister. But Louis was glad he had the younger sibling as his assistant, since he was a complete angel. Gemma, not so much.

The car halted soon, overlooking the port and the older ladies got out immediately. Louis opened the door and stepped out hurriedly, breathing in the fresh air while straightening his shirt. He watched as Harry stumbled out, literally and blushed when he caught Louis’ smile. He pulled down on his sweater self consciously, exposing his collarbones and the two small letter tattoos. The sweater was a little large on his lanky frame and Louis was right in his assumption that his narrow shoulders would make it seem bigger. But it looked nice and cosy and Harry obviously loved it so it was alright.

“I’m nervous,” Louis revealed as he bit his lip, making Harry gasp and look at him with wide eyes full of surprise. Louis cast a glance at Gemma, who was standing far away but still watching him like hawk. He found it easier to ignore her now and just stare into the endless beauty of Harry’s eyes. Okay he needed to not do that. “I know I say I’m a good actor, and I am but not in the context of boyfriends. The last time I... nevermind. I’m just not that good at romance stuff. And I’m sure you can’t act like a boyfriend to me either, apart from the occasional touching. I don’t know how and I’m... nervous.”

“It will be alright, Lou,” Harry whispered, stepping closer and placing his large arms on Louis’ biceps. He started rubbing his arm, a warm smile on his lips. “Whoever is great at faking romance, except for perhaps professional actors but then that’s their job. You should just be... less rigid and more casual with me, call me nicknames like I told you too and don’t shy away.” He chuckled when Louis smiled, his next words taking a teasing tilt to them. “Just stop treating me like a puppy and walk alongside me as well. And oh, be nice to me.”

“Nice to you?”

Harry nodded enthusiastically, smirking now. “I can teach you to be nice. I’m good at being nice. And Lou, if you just let me be in charge of this we’ll succeed. I’m a great boyfriend.”

“Is that why you’re single?” Louis quipped, feeling like himself again. Trust Harry to ground him. Louis burst into laughter as he watched Harry’s face being overtaken by a large frown. He couldn’t help it since it made Harry look like an upset frog. Harry dropped his hands and stepped back quickly, bottom lip jutting out. It made Louis laugh further, hand curling over his stomach. Harry didn’t find it as amusing when he lugged their luggage out of the trunk. “Oh Haz baby, don’t be like that.”

“Just for that,” he started, narrowing his eyes at him after he kept Louis’ bag on the ground. He picked up his own duffle, swinging it over his shoulder with a smug smile. “Carry your own bag.”

“I hey what the –” Louis stammered as he stared after Harry and his taut back. Gemma laughed at Louis’ expression, no doubt incredulous, as she skipped ahead finally. Louis shot his trolley bag a glare before grabbing the handle. With a swift kick to it, he managed to tilt it before turning it around and dragging behind him. He was sure it would be better if he just lifted it than dragged, but it would also dirty his blue shirt and slacks, which he didn’t know to get the stains out of. Halfway through, Harry turned around to smirk at him and Louis glared back, huffing as he pulled the bag over the uneven ground. All that time in the gym almost seemed wasted at this point. “Fuck. Fuck this and fuck Harry.”

Louis watched as Gemma came to a halt where the port ended, apparently, turning around before taking a step down and slowly disappearing. He slowed down, watching as Harry came to a stop on the same place but stopped, hands on his hips as he watched Louis draw closer. Louis eyed the edge suspiciously, before looking up at Harry. Did they live underwater?

“And now we just have to climb down,” Harry said with a flourish and threw his duffle over the edge. Louis winced, waiting for the inevitable splash but it never came. Instead there was a dull thud that echoed. Louis looked over the edge and found over the water floated a makeshift wooden floor beside which there was a medium sized motor boat. It looked like it could accommodate at least twenty people in it. Gammy and Anne were already seated on the chairs and looking up while Gemma loaded up Harry’s bag. She glanced up as well, grinning in amusement at whatever Louis’ face was doing. Harry looked carefree when Louis looked back at him while he couldn't say he felt the same. He was feeling apprehension. “The house is just a boat ride away from here.”

“You know I can’t swim, right?” Louis asked, eyebrows rising up on his forehead as his grip tightened around the handle of his bag. Harry laughed, finding it funny for some reason as he clapped his hands in mock excitement.

“Good to know, hubby dearest,” he said cheerily, eyes wide and amused. “But how is that relevant?”

“Your home is across a... a...” Louis squinted in confusion at the water that lay ahead of them, wondering whether it was a lake or sea. “A water body. I can’t swim.”

Harry pursed his lips, trying to look serious but his eyes were twinkling teasingly. “Hence the boat, Lou, now keep up.” He spun around and Louis took a step back for good measure, watching as his assistant stepped on the first rung of the wooden ladder. His Chelsea boots were first to disappear as he took another step down. “Usually people don’t fall. The ladder is mostly sturdy and the boat doesn’t trip people. You don’t have to worry.”

“You’re worrying me by saying it like that,” Louis said, his voice sounding squeaky before he immediately cleared his throat. Harry laughed knowingly and winked before he stepped lower and disappeared completely. Louis had to lean forward to watch him step on the solid ground rather gracefully. “How do I climb down?”

“First throw the bag,” Harry yelled, cupping his hands around his mouth. Louis looked apprehensively at his bag, which was huge and heavy. He knew because he pulled it.

“It’s heavy. You’ll drop it.”

“I won’t.”

“Your death wish. But in no case will you drop it.” Louis pulled up his bag with a little difficulty and flung it slightly away from the edge. Harry caught it easily, giving him a sunny grin before passing the bag on to Gemma, who kept it in the boat before climbing in. She didn't sit on the chair and rather walked to the front of it, Louis noticed. “And now I’m climbing down.”

He could hear Harry’s chuckle from below but Louis chose to ignore that, turning around like Harry had before placing his foot gently on the ladder. He tested its sturdiness before grabbing on to it and lowering himself further as he placed his foot on the lower rung.

“You can do this baby,” Harry leered from before laughing at his own words. Louis lowered himself again, placing his foot on the lower rung and let out a sigh when he didn’t fall. He didn’t trust this thing, or Harry for that matter, who was yelling half encouragements that ended with laughs. His heart leaped in his chest when he missed the third last step, shrieking a little and not even bothering to feel embarrassed about it. Harry acted quickly as he stepped ahead and grab Louis’ butt of all things to steady him. “I won’t let you fall, Lou bear.”

“I appreciate the help,” Louis hissed, looking over his shoulder to glare at Harry. “But I’d appreciate it more if your hand was off my arse.”

 

“Oops sorry,” Harry murmured before taking his hands off and stepping back. He was aware of his sister’s snicker behind him and felt chagrined. He curled his hands into fists beside him, blushing furiously because he had just groped his boss. It was an accident, of course. But he felt embarrassed still, so he looked decisively at his feet. Hence he missed the moment when Louis skipped the second last rung and instead planted his foot directly on the makeshift floor. Harry looked up a second later and watched in horror as Louis lost his balance so without thinking about it, he rushed forward to grab his around the waist this time to steady him. Somehow, Louis turned in the process, gripping onto the front of Harry’s shirt to brace himself and pulled them closer in the process. It happened in a matter of seconds but to him it felt as if the moment stretched on for hours and time slowed down. They were close, so close than Harry was held captive by the intensity of Louis’ sharp, blue eyes.

Harry was clutching Louis tightly, so tight that he could feel Louis’ heartbeat resonate in his chest. He felt out of breath, enveloped in the heady scent of Louis’ cologne and the proximity of their lips. Unwittingly his eyes dropped to Louis’ lips, thin and pink and parted in the surprise of it all. He desperately wanted to kiss him at that moment, and it would be so easy to close the small distance between them. He could almost taste him anyway and without thinking, Harry licked his lips, eyes flitting up to find Louis tracing the movement. And Harry was about to lean in, unbeknownst that he already had, when he heard the muted sound of Gammy and his mom’s laughter, growing louder by the second. Gemma was clearing his throat as well and it snapped Louis out of the daze and he leaned back quickly. Harry was still in a daze as he slid his arms slowly off Louis’ hips and turned around. He caught Gemma’s smirk and knew she would be waiting to tell him all about how he definitely had a crush on Louis. He could wait on telling her that he was just attracted to an attractive man, as any other person would be but he was not crushing on his boss. Although he was starting to doubt it made sense. But he could always blame it on jetlag.

“Thank you Harry,” he heard Louis whisper softly behind him, probably not intending to say it out loud but he accepted it, messing with his hair as he walked towards the boat.

He held Louis’ hand and helped him in, feeling his heart picking up pace due to the touch even if he knew it meant nothing at all. Then he clambered to the back of the boat, because he liked it there. And surprisingly, Louis followed him there and sat next to him, fiddling fiddling with his laptop bag. As soon as Gemma started the boat though, Louis’ hand landed on Harry’s thigh and his fingers digging in at every jolt. Harry was holding his breath, eyes intent on the place where Louis’ hand rested and he didn’t how how to react. He wasn’t feeling up to speaking, not when Louis was grabbing on to his thigh like that and he was happy that the man wasn’t the chattiest of people as well. Harry was too overwhelmed and he was thankful that Gemma wasn’t going to notice this.

His grip loosened after five minutes, once he was slightly comfortable with the jerks but didn’t move his hand away. Harry tried desperately not to focus on the place but his eyes did flit over to gaze at Louis’ face, which was pinched with worry and his eyes squinted due to the sun. The wind was blowing Louis’ hair in different directions but he didn’t try to fix it at all, content on letting them fly over his eyes.

“That’s our destination,” Harry pointed out rather uselessly as he nodded towards the two storey mansion that was getting clearer with each passing second. Louis gasped softly beside him and Harry decided he wanted to see what his face was doing. He wasn’t disappointed to see the wonder in his eyes, lips still parted in surprise as he faced him now, looking betrayed and awed all at once.

“That’s a bloody castle right there,” he whispered, sounding more British at the moment and younger too. It wasn't a castle, per se but it was grand surely. “Who even are you people?”

Harry shrugged as he looked away, knowing he was blushing at the moment. He felt the loss of warmth on his thigh when Louis withdrew his hand. He finally carded his fingers through his hair in a vain attempt to flatten it. It did nothing to make his hair settle. And something inside Harry prompted him to catch Louis’ hand and fix his hair himself, sifting his finger carefully through to untangle the knots before patting his head to flatten them. Louis didn’t protest once although he looked curious and confused, blinking slowly before looking away when they reached the shore. Or rather the bridge, which was a few metres long and merged into the actual shore. Louis climbed out with ease but waited for Harry this time, chuckling when he stumbled the moment he stepped out. His mom and Gammy had walked ahead already, saying something about how the younger kids should spend time together while they went ahead to mingle. Whatever that meant.

“It means the two of you are making your debut in the middle of a big, big party,” Gemma explained with a wide grin as stepped out behind Harry, placing her hands on her hips. For all she sounded amused right now, her face was impassive and stern. “Bet you didn’t expect that.”

“What do you mean?” Harry asked, holding his breath. Louis was shifting from foot to foot, trying to look composed and failing. “What party?”

“Gammy decided that she’ll throw a welcoming party for you,” Gemma elaborated, stepping around him to start walking ahead, but backwards. Her heels made a loud clicking sound against the wood and she did look too dressed up for just picking up. Of course she had worn her heels today when she usually hated them. Of course, he thought as he let out a groan. “After you announced that you’ll be arriving with your boyfriend, which is a miracle, she altered the purpose of everything. So now she threw a ‘pre birthday’ and ‘welcome home’ party at once. She thought it would be a great idea to throw a party for you right after you get off a long journey. If only she listened to any other soul, I swear. Anyway, so gathered in there are some odd fifty of our closest neighbours, waiting for you. So prepare yourself now and hand me your bags.”

“We’ve decided not to tell them about our engagement,” Harry said, biting on his fingernail as he passed Gemma his bag. Gemma huffed as he took Louis’ bag and Harry glanced at him. He had gone slightly pale, his eyes wide and he looked vaguely like a small, scared animal. He barely looked himself and it was the strangest sight, which prompted Harry to wrap Louis in a side hug without thinking too much of it. “Are you alright?”

“Peachy,” Louis answered with a strained smile. “I’m sure everyone will hate me and I will fuck everything up. It’s alright.”

“Louis we could –”

“I’m fine.”

“I’m sure they’ll –”

“Fine!” Louis insisted through gritted teeth, eyes bearing no room for discussion. Harry sighed nodding and Louis sagged into his side, sighing as well. “I’m sure Gemma is happy that I’m nervous, huh?”

“Honestly, yes,” she said. She tilted her head to a side, eyebrows furrowed. “But don’t worry, I won’t freak you out more. Harry has asked me to play nice and I love him so, I will. I’ll help you out with minor mishaps, but in the major ones count me out. We don’t know each other.”

“Thanks,” Louis murmured with a weak smile and nudged Harry’s arm. He let go easily, straightening himself and pulling on his sweater.

“That’s the sweater he gave you, right?” Gemma asked, finally turning over so she was walking straight again. “It’s cute.”

Harry was busy feeling embarrassed and looking away, not noticing how chagrined Louis was feeling as well. They walked the short distance in relative silence hence they could hear the noise from inside the house getting louder. He didn’t know how he would get through this, having not attended a single dinner party in years now. He never liked them, mainly since the people were nosy. He especially didn’t know what to say to them without revealing the fact that he was pretending to date his boss to get a promotion and for him to get a green card rather illegally. The main problem was to stop them from finding out Louis was his boss. Harry was sure this would go spectacularly horrible.

He wasn’t much wrong in the end, after all.

***


	4. Chapter 4

Gemma took both their bags and walked in first before disappearing up the stairs. Louis looked a little nervous but smiled softly when Harry grabbed his hand and then they walked in. At first, no one noticed that the two of them had joined their own welcoming party. It was a good thing and Harry felt relieved. They stayed close to each other, lingering in the corner silently as they observed everyone else. Harry saw a few familiar faces, recognising them as his neighbours or cousins that he hadn’t interacted with in years. He felt no need to walk up to them, mainly since there was nothing to talk about. Harry was searching for just two people, the one two people he could stand in this town anyway but they were no doubt hiding as well. Their house was so huge that they could be anywhere. His phone buzzed in his pocket and he reached to check it, finding that it was the man he was looking for. He grinned and replied before turning to tell Louis that they were meeting his friends. Just Louis looked pale, eyes distant.

“Louis,” he whispered as he nudged his shoulder and the man snapped out of it. He rubbed his face and shook his head as he gathered himself and smiled. “You alright? We can just head upstairs. But my friends are here now and they’re nice. We can talk to them.”

“I’m alright,” Louis whispered, more to himself than to Harry and it just confused him. Why was Louis, the ever confident suddenly so anxious? It wasn’t any different from the business parties that he took Harry to. He always seemed elegant then, holding drinks in his hands and moving from person to person and charming them. He mingled with people smoothly, just as smooth as he was at avoiding some so Harry always assumed he was in his element then. He was having doubts connecting those two people now. Before he could ask him what this was about, he was found by his whirlwind of a best friend as Niall wrapped himself along Harry’s back.

“Hazzy!” he half yelled in Harry’s ears, followed by a loud cackle of laughter. He could smell the alcohol on Niall’s breath and immediately knew calling his friends was a bad idea. And maybe it all went downhill from there.

“Niall,” Harry laughed and buckled under the pressure of his friend until Niall let go. Liam was right behind Niall, grinning widely and extending his arms to wrap Harry in a hug. Harry grinned at his friends who he hadn’t seen in such long. “Liam.”

“Hey Harry,” Liam said in a normal level of voice as he let go of Harry. All of his hair was gone and he was sporting buzzed hair. He didn’t look bad, per se but it was weird. “Didn’t think you would show up, if I’m being honest. You’re always so busy.”

“I didn’t think I could make it either,” Harry replied with a laugh as he shook his head. He was acutely aware of Louis’ quiet presence behind him, could feel his eyes. “But well, it is Gammy’s ninetieth and she would throw a fit if I was to miss this. So you know, couldn’t miss it.”

“She would have killed ya.” Niall cackled again. His hair was brown now and there was stubble on his chin. But his wide grin and loudness was the same, which was a welcome relief. “So glad you’re alive, mate. But who’s that behind ya? He looks left out.”

“Oh.” Harry blindly reached behind him for Louis’ hand, grabbing it quickly and dragging the man forward. A side glance told him Louis looked calm again, or at least seemed to be. He was also smiling, entwining their fingers. “This is Louis, my boyfriend.”

Niall blinked at him blankly for a few seconds before exploding into laughter, further attracting the attention of everyone in the room who hadn’t been staring before. Harry wanted to facepalm, he really did but couldn’t do that since he had plenty eyes on him. He was sure the palm holding Louis’ had gone sweaty. Niall stopped laughing when no one joined in, looking surprised. “Oh you do really have a boyfriend. I thought the whispers in this room were wrong because we didn’t know it beforehand. I thought hey this guy doesn’t have time for friends how would he have time for a boyfriend and – ow Liam, way to ruin my speech!”

“Be nice,” Liam reprimanded, eyebrows furrowed before he smiled at Louis. “Hey, nice to meet you. I’m Liam.”

“Hello,” Louis replied curtly. He freed his hand just to place it on the small of Harry’s back and leaned in close, the other hand gripping his laptop bag tightly. Harry had forgotten to ask him if he should take the bag, knowing Louis hated carrying stuff around. But he couldn’t exactly ask him right now, not when his friends were around. “I’m Louis.”

“I’m Niall,” Niall piped. “And you seem... English?”

“I am indeed.” Louis gave a teeth-baring grin. “What gave it away? Was it the teeth?”

Niall laughed while Harry stared at his boss in surprise. He was actually joking? With someone who wasn’t Harry? Was this a dream? Louis looked up at him with amusement twinkling in his blue eyes and his grin was genuine too. “What?”

“I didn’t know you joked,” Harry quipped, with it coming out softer and fonder than he had expected.

“Why of course I do!” Louis exclaimed with mock offense, clutching his chest. “It’s like you don’t even know me, Harold.”

Harry grinned wider, unable to look away. “But joking about British stereotypes, why Lou, you adhere to mostly every single one of them. Except for the teeth, of course, they’re perfect.”

“Name one,” he challenged, eyebrows raised and that teasing glint in his eyes.

“Let’s see.” Harry hummed for dramatic effect, pursing his lips to keep himself from smiling. “You love drinking tea, love football, tend to talk with a posh accent sometimes. Tend to not show emotions.”

“Hey!”

“Although, you hate to queue, or be polite. So I don’t really know.”

“You’re just being rude, right now,” Louis muttered, lips turned down in a frown and Harry laughed. On a whim, he leaned forward to peck Louis’ cheek and they were both blushing when he drew back.

“You’re so cute,” Niall exclaimed and Liam nodded beside him.

“I’m assuming you live in New York too, Louis?” Liam prompted and Louis nodded. “Where do you work?”

“Um, I’m editor in chief actually,” Louis said slowly. And in hindsight, Harry should have stopped him. “Of Colden books. I just read for a living.”

“Oh Harry works at Colden books as well for...” Niall started before realisation dawned on him. His eyes widened as he squeaked. “You’re his boss!”

Way to go Niall, Harry thought before he buried his nose in Louis’ hair. It was an impulse and he wasn’t sure if he was allowed to do that until after, as he breathed in the scent of coconuts ticking his nose. He liked this better than looking up to find every single person in the room staring at him in surprise. Louis’ arms were on his waist and Harry tilted himself until they were almost in an embrace. Liam groaned and shushed Niall but it was too late. The damage was already done.

“Is this the one who kept you busy?” Niall asked as he waggled his eyebrows and burst into laughter. Louis made a weird sound in the back of his throat and Harry finally lifted his head to glare at his friend. “What?”

“You’ve alerted everyone,” Liam whispered in his ear, finally making him look around and frown. “You were screaming.”

“Was I?”

“Code red,” Gemma hissed and suddenly appeared in front of Harry somehow. “I know we haven’t discussed codes yet but it means danger. Mom got to know that you’re dating your boss and is heading your way. I’ll take Louis with me since she’ll need to talk to you personally.”

“Is no one asking for my opinion?” Louis asked grumpily, dropping his arm from Harry’s back. “I am here, you know.”

“If you wanna be alone, be my guest.” Gemma raised her eyebrows at him, making him sigh and agree. “Glad we’re on the same page. So good luck, Harry.”

With that, she dragged Louis away. And Niall and Liam had disappeared too. So when his mom inevitably popped up in front of him, he was alone. Oh well.

 

Louis’ arm was hurting where Gemma’s fingers dug in and he complained about it as they walked towards... somewhere. He had no clue. Just the place was big and crowded and everyone was looking at him. Not that strange an experience, really.

“I will cut out the protective big sister act,” Gemma started, aiming a look at him. “If you stop acting like a baby.”

“I’m not acting like a baby!” he protested, digging his foot in so they came to a halt. They had escaped the living room and were stood in a patio. There were only a few, older people around and no one paid them any heed.

Gemma rolled her eyes. “Harry has told me everything about you. I know your personality so drop the act.”

“Fine.” Louis huffed, rubbing his arm that Gemma had let go of. “But I’m nervous so I mix up my personalities alright.”

“You have plural personalities?” Gemma asked incredulously, before laughing. She was like her brother in a lot of ways, Louis could see, just a little bolder. Harry was in no means shy, but he certainly was hesitant. Louis wouldn’t blame him since he had that effect on people. “I thought it was only confusing and cold. Good to know you have an anxious side too.”

“You’re not funny.”

“On the contrary, I’m funnier than Harry.” She raised her eyebrows pointed, as if she knew something he didn’t. “And since we’re on the topic, let’s talk about Harry. What are your intentions with him?”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean.” She rolled her eyes as if he was being too difficult. “You’re keeping your promise of promoting him, aren’t you? Because he deserves it.”

“I was planning to,” he replied, raising his chin. “I usually don’t break promises.”

Gemma hummed. “So Louis, tell me something.”

Louis narrowed his eyes instinctively at seeing her smile, feeling suspicious. “Like what?”

 

“I’m sure,” Harry insisted, his patience wearing thin while smiling at yet another stranger. “I do love him. Now if you’ll excuse me.”

Luckily, he had practise dealing with annoying people (Louis) so right now, he was right in his comfort zone. Or something like that. There were hoards of neighbours and extended family members interested in his love life right now, reaching out to him once they came to know there was a controversy attached to him. Funny how he escaped Sitka to avoid such people but got a job with similarly nosy co-workers. Just his luck really that he couldn’t escape meddlesome, annoying people in his life. Everyone wanted to know whether he was sleeping with his boss to get a promotion or because he actually liked him as a person. It was as if they didn’t even know what kind of person he was and suspected him to be the worst kind. Which, probably they didn’t know him. He wasn’t the most social person when he was here, always locking himself in his room whenever Gammy threw a party downstairs. Gammy loved social gatherings, unlike him.

As he dodged yet another vaguely familiar nosy aunt, he gently massaged his forehead, manoeuvring through the living room and heading towards the patio. The conversation with his mom had gone well, with her asking if he really loved him. She seemed satisfied when he said that indeed he did and said that she knew there was something genuine between them and not just some fling. Harry was relieved to see she had believed their lie but also confused as to why it was so easy. He thought he would have a hard time convincing her since Harry was somewhat reluctant when falling in love, despite what he had told Louis. His emotions showed onto his face, so he had been sure no one would believe their farce. But they believed, alright. It shouldn’t seem too believable to his mother, yet it was. He tried not to think about it right now.

Harry could see Louis’ fluffy head on the patio beside Gemma, felt a smile tugging on his lips at the sight. Louis looked like he was in an animated discussion with her, hands moving as he spoke. He noticed how the blue of his shirt matched the sky behind him and it was picturesque, really. His eyes were focused on his silhouette; hence he missed his cousin heading towards him.

“Harry!” Jeff called and Harry sighed and halted. It wasn’t just any cousin, it was his annoyingly persistent cousin. To his misfortune, Jeff lived nearby and always tailed him when they were kids, even though he was a good five years older. He just talked all the time, as if their opinions ever matched. It was usually snarky comments that he passed on everyone and Harry hated him. Okay no hate, per se but strongly disliked him for sure. “Is what I heard true? Are you sleeping with your boss?”

Harry turned around to give him a pained smile that threatened to turn into a frown. “Yeah. That's true.”

“Great way to advance your career, I agree.” Jeff laughed as if it was funny while Harry took in a deep breath. “So he must be hot, right? I haven’t really seen him around tonight. I’ve heard Louis Tomlinson is this bossy asshole who usually disconnected with everyone. His reputation precedes him. I’m surprised he wants to be seen with you here since I thought it wasn’t his thing.” He leaned in closer, widening his eyes as he lowered his voice to a whisper. “I’ve heard he doesn’t date. Closed off and all.”

“He’s a good guy,” Harry maintained through gritted teeth. He felt more annoyed now than before, when everyone was doubting his morals. Insulting Louis was uncalled for, really. “He’s good at his job and he isn’t an asshole.”

“Come on, you can tell me,” Jeff said in a stage whisper, winking as if they were on friendly terms. “When are you getting promoted? I guess you’re breaking it off right after since he’s a pain.”

“You don’t...” Harry started. But before he could finish the thought, there was a warm hand pressed on his back, right between his shoulder blades. He had grown familiar to the touch, breathing in the familiar scent and relaxing immediately.

“What’s going on here, gentlemen?” Louis said coolly, giving Jeff a cold smile. For the first time maybe, Harry was happy his fiancé was a cold person. Er, pretend fiancé for now. “Talking about me?”

Jeff blinked, looking between them before finally smiling. “Oh you’re Louis. Have heard a lot about you.”

“Tomlinson,” Louis corrected, making Jeff’s smile wane. “And I know what you’ve heard. Afraid all of that is true. I am a cold, asshole of a person. The latter part though, applies to you too, I may say.”

“What?” he stuttered, giving Harry a confused look. He was not helping Jeff out, nope. He had it coming.

“You seem quite curious about our dating life.” Louis’ hand slid lower on Harry’s back, resting on the small of his back again. The movement was comforting and giving him confidence. He snaked his hand around Louis’ waist to pull him closer and lean towards him, aware of the eyes resting on them. They were the loudest distraction the sleepy town had and everyone was flocking to watch it unfold. “So I’ll lay it down for you. It’s none of your business. Don’t question his intentions and make him seem to be, I don’t know, someone who takes advantage of people to advance themselves. I strongly suspect you’re that kind hence you’re labelling him it. And regarding how quickly he’ll break it off with me, sorry to break your illusion but we’re actually in love. I love him.”

“I love him too,” Harry added, feeling butterflies spread their wings in the pit of his stomach hearing Louis’ words. He was a brilliant actor since Harry found himself believing it even though he knew it was a lie. They weren’t sleeping together and neither they were in love, he reminded himself. He felt smug looking at Jeff’s crestfallen, guilty face. “In fact, we’re engaged.”

Just his luck that his voice was raised while there was a lull in everyone’s conversation. His words rung in the air, in the silence that it left and everyone gasped. He felt déjà vu as he watched everyone’s startled faces before realising he really didn’t care. He didn’t care what they thought or what they felt about his and Louis’ (nonexistent) relationship. He was beyond it.

“Engaged,” Louis repeated and no one but Harry could sense the quiet confusion behind his word. They weren’t supposed to reveal that today, especially not in front of such a big audience but oh well. The deed was done. Louis had revealed their fake engagement at work and Harry revealed it in his hometown. They were even, in that disastrous aspect. “And in love.”

“Oh god no,” he heard Gemma’s soft sigh behind him. In a louder voice, she said, “That’s great. Congratulations, Harry and Louis.”

It might have been a good save, if not for the fact that it made everyone chime in with their own congratulations, rushing towards them. Jeff was pushed aside in the process, at which Harry shamelessly chuckled but Louis was also pushed closer to him, making him choke on the said chuckles. Louis was somehow almost big spooning him, chin resting on Harry’s shoulder as he muttered some choice words at the situation they were in, his accent almost unrecognisable. The more frustrated he got, the more accented he got. It was good to know.

Since Harry was having a weird week, he was unfazed by the sudden amplified attention, sending Gemma quiet gratitude as he pasted a too wide smile on his face as he thanked everyone. The unknown people showed almost genuine happiness for him and it was hilarious since Louis said the opposite in his ear. Then it was Gammy cutting in through the crowd with a thunderous expression. Harry sort of shrunk down to fit in Louis’ arms at the sight, afraid that he done the wrong thing somehow. Like steal Gammy’s attention.

“I cannot believe I wasn’t the first one to be told,” she exclaimed, throwing his hands in the air before her expression broke into something that was joyous. She spread her arms wide, almost whacking a pompous lady in the nose and didn’t care one bit. It would be funny if not for the timing. “It’s my birthday in two days and this is a treat. I’m so happy for the two of you, congratulations. But hey, where is the little one?”

“Not so little,” Louis mumbled as he gripped Harry’s bicep and popped up from behind his back. Louis was pouting, apparently offended at the comment but not that much. Harry laughed at his expression before biting down on his lip to tame it. “And thank you.”

“I knew something bigger than what you said was going on,” Gammy continued, pointing at the two of them as her tiny frame shook with laughter. “The two of you seem married at first glance, I don’t know. I asked Gemma if she felt the same and she feigned ignorance.” She narrowed her eyes and scanned her surroundings. “Seems like she’s disappeared. Don’t worry I’ll find her soon. But today is about the two of you. And me, of course. I’m so glad my grandson found love and someone to make him happy. No wonder you keep defending your boss. He’s right there and you love him.”

“I love him,” Harry repeated with a hollow laugh. He was feeling sad due to the realisation that despite what everyone thought, he was yet to find someone. It was all he had wanted when he was twenty one, which felt like a lifetime ago. He was all alone, with Louis, of all people, for company. He was going to wind up like him, if he didn’t go back to New York and get his life together. As if sensing the thoughts, Louis’ fingers dug in his arm, enough to making him flinch. “Thanks Gammy. And I defend him and mean it, not just because I, uh, love him. He is a great person to just... sit and admire what he’s like.”

Worst thing was that Harry meant every word, except the part where he said he loved Louis. But he was a great person and Harry admired him as a person, not as a boss but well.

“He’s whipped,” Louis said in a stage whisper, blowing Harry’s efforts of acting like an actual person in love. Or something resembling it. But as he stared at Louis, he couldn’t even try looking offended. Not when Louis’ grin was wide enough that it showed off his sharp incisors as he looked cheeky. It made Harry feel giddy rather as he shook his head fondly. “Can’t go for a minute without praising me. Almost makes me blush sometimes.”

“At least it’s better than talking with gestures than using words,” Harry retorted, smiling when Louis raised his eyebrows. “Remember how you gifted me this sweater because you wanted to say you cared for me and help me hide the coffee stains on my white shirt? Because I don’t think you happened to have a sweater two sizes big lying around.”

Louis’ cheeks coloured as he stuttered before looking away. “I bought it in the wrong size. I told you.”

“He loves me but is dense in admitting it,” Harry told Gammy, feeling his stomach flutter at his own words. It toed the line of reality, making him almost believe that it was the real reason.

“That’s men for you,” Gammy said before laughing. She clapped her hands together, looking gleefully between the two of them. “So tell me all the cute details. How did the proposal go?”

She was looking mostly at Louis as she expected the answer, probably assuming he was the one to propose. If they were together, yes he would be the one to propose since he’d want to beat Harry to the chase or would be the braver one hence first. That's why in their fake backstory, he was the one proposing too. But the assumption was preposterous, that too from his own grandmother. He wanted to throw a dramatic fit, but well, people.

“That's all great, mother,” Anne said as she appeared, smiling softly and apologetically at Harry. “But let’s head back into the living room. Harry dear, you must be tired. Come and sit.”

“Okay.” Harry smiled, grateful for his mom’s intervention as he followed her to the living room. For once, Louis walked behind him, leading him forth with an insistent hand on Harry’s back. He seemed to have adjusted quickly and it was nice to be led, for once rather than trip over his feet in haste to keep up.

In his head, Harry knew it was an exaggeration when he thought the crowd parted in front of him but he still believed it. He could hear words and whispers, with people not bothering to be subtle about it, knew that it was aimed at him. He really wished they would get a life. But then, he was the one to have made the decision to get himself tangled up in Louis’ problems so he’d have to bear the consequences as well. He wished he had refused back then but he probably wouldn’t be allowed to be in Sitka this weekend either so.

“So tell us about it, Harry,” Gammy said the moment his ass touched the sofa. Harry sighed, letting the sentence hang for a few more minutes as he got comfortable. Louis chuckled as he sat beside him but kept a considerable amount of space between them. They were sitting too far to be boyfriends, Harry thought so he spread his legs so their knees were touching. Louis looked at him in confusion before he realised and nodded slightly. “Louis, you tell me how the proposal went. This one is being too shy.”

The truthful answer was that the idea was cooked when Louis faced deportation, but that wasn’t the most pleasing answer. So Harry turned towards Louis with an imploring expression, knowing he wasn’t that good of a liar. But Louis was. And didn’t he say he had the best plan? He was excited as well to know. “Yes baby, please tell us.”

“Alright,” Louis said neutrally before smiling. He seemed nervous, fingers drumming against Harry’s thigh and Harry caught them once again under his palm. “It’s not that grand, honestly. We began dating a year ago, a secret affair because well, forbidden relationship. It was exciting and new and Harry here was absolutely smitten with me.”

“Was not!”

“In April, he was upset with me for some petty reason, giving me puppy eyes when no one was watching and the likes. It was cute, honestly but I’m surprised no one suspected us.” Louis was smirking at him and yeah, Harry resented giving him the reigns. He would make this worse for him. “And last month I had to go to Frankfurt book fair and Harry didn’t like it one bit.”

“You accused me of forgetting our anniversary,” Harry interjected, having gathered the courage to do so. He was unaware what everyone else’s reactions were. He was only staring at Louis, and his quirked eyebrows and smug smile. “When it was clearly two weeks later. Of course I didn’t like when you accused me and I was right to be upset about it.”

“You’re interrupting the story, Hazza,” Louis countered smoothly, making Harry’s heart skip at the nickname. He _was_ learning quickly. “And it was part of the plan.”

“The wooing and sending me flowers and chocolate at my apartment every day part of plan too?” he countered, feeling himself smirk as well. It was a good retort.

“That was just to spoil you.” Louis poked Harry’s cheek, right where his dimple would be. Harry didn’t understand it at all but he still smiled, Louis’ finger dipping in his cheek. “And you didn’t like the classic red roses. Everyone likes classic. So I had to search for your favourite, changing the bouquet until you found the flower you liked. It was primrose, by the way. So boring, right?”

Louis directed the last part to the crowd, making them laugh. He was himself again, holding everyone’s attention and not shying away from it. It was nice to see him like that, acting superior but also, it was against Harry. So he would not be having it either.

“You don’t even like flowers.” It was a lie. “Besides, I thought you were with someone else and just trying to appease me for your mistakes.”

“You manage my schedules, so you very well know I couldn’t have been,” Louis deadpanned. His eyes were sparkling despite his tone. “But anyway. So Harry was protesting going to Frankfurt because another book fair. But I managed to convince him that it was important. He booked the flights and hotel for us while I was to pick the place to dine. I had found this great restaurant overlooking the lake. There were lit candles on the table, the long ones not the stubby fragrant one he likes. The stars were reflecting off the lake, fairy lights clung to the trees and people were sparse. It was so romantic and he obviously liked it.”

“I thought he had got another assistant, since he clearly has no romantic bone in him.” Harry smirked as everyone laughed, even Louis, who was amused. If Louis’ idea of romance was anything like this story, he certainly wouldn’t be a bad boyfriend. But the thing was that Harry had never seen him in a relationship. It could be that he was sneaky, although Harry doubted that. His story was spun with sugar, entirely too sweet and unlike the person Louis was. It was enchanting everyone, even Harry who was curiously as to how the fake proposal story would go. He was loving the setting for sure. “Turns out, his sister had told him about the restaurant.”

“I just asked for her advice,” Louis cut in, eyebrows drawn together. “But I did the booking part. I was thinking about going for the cliché ring in the desert thing but I was afraid he would choke. So in the middle of dinner, I got down on one knee –”

“While complaining about his soiled suit. As he gave a long winded speech about how much he loved me.”

“And Harry said yes,” Louis cut him off, with eyebrows raised challengingly. Harry sniggered, scrunching his nose. “With tears in his eyes.”

“Louis was crying as well,” Harry said over him, knowing they were painting quite a picture. But he didn’t care, since Louis was no longer frowning or anxious. He was smilingly widely, eyes squinted into half moons of delight. They were turned towards each other, had done so a little while into their conversation. “It was a snotty mess, I guess.”

Louis’ eyes held wonder and Harry found just a little green in his sea blue eyes. He seemed happy, lit from within and Harry felt warm right where his heart was. Their hands were clasped tight between them and he hadn’t realised they were doing that. There was a faraway whoop and Harry blinked, realising that they were in the midst of a lot of people and chuckled awkwardly as he looked away. It was strange how lost he got while bantering with Louis, forgetting that he held the eyes of so many people, who were now smiling at them.

“Come on kiss him!” yelled someone, sounding suspiciously like Niall. Harry looked at the source of the voice and found nothing.

“Yeah kiss him,” said another, sounding like Gemma. What even!

“Surely we can’t do that,” Harry said, chuckling nervously as his eyes scanned the crowd. Louis was saying the same thing beside him. It didn’t do the required job, rather made his old friends and neighbours chant ‘kiss him’, making Harry feel antsy. He exchanged a look with Louis, who wanted to do anything but show PDA. But they couldn’t escape it, Harry nonverbally said to him with a shrug. Louis sighed softly. “Alright, alright.”

“We’re doing it,” Louis said softly as he leaned in closer. Harry’s eyes dropped down to Louis’ lips. Harry closed his eyes when Louis pressed his lips against his. His lips were chapped this time and tasted fruity, from the drink they had had earlier. But the kiss was over too soon for his liking. He blinked his eyes open, finding Louis’ eyes boring into his. “And it’s over.”

“That’s too short, Harry,” Gammy was saying, her voice coming from afar. And why was Harry so dazed due to just a one second press of lips. “Kiss him for real!”

And Harry took charge, cupping Louis’ jaw and smashing their lips together. Louis was quick to kiss him back, the awkwardness lesser than the previous times as he cupped the back of Harry’s neck. It was instinctual as he moved his lips, brushing his tongue over Louis’ lower lip. He seemed to forget everything around him, could feel nothing but the other man and he felt like drowning in the feeling. Louis was the one to pull away again, making Harry whine and subconsciously chase his lips before the noise around them got louder and startled him into the present. What the fuck had happened there, he wondered while staring at Louis’ lips, which were swollen and wet. He wanted to kiss him again but couldn’t since, they weren’t really together and leaned back, taking a shuddering breath. Louis looked fine, wiping his lips with a smile and if it weren’t for his eyes getting darker, he would look unaffected.

“Well that was long drawn and cute,” Gemma complained from somewhere. Some people objected to it, some cheered. Gammy and Anne were giving him knowing smiles as well and Harry felt sick and cold at the realisation. While they were tricking everyone, he was tricking himself too. It wasn’t a genuine kiss, wasn’t made of love. It was a lie! What was he doing? “I’m hungry, it’s past nine. Can we just eat?”

The people were immediately distracted, chiming in with their agreements and moving away. Harry held himself straight until every last one, along with Gammy disappeared and then slumped back into the sofa. What was he doing, he asked himself, stomach churning as an answer. The exhaustion from the long plane journey was getting to him, along with the stress the pretending had brought. If he could, he would just sink into the familiar softness of home and never sit up again. He would paint himself invisible just to get a few more minutes of peace, where no one expected anything from him. Or talked to him, for that matter. He was done with conversations for the day, craved a good few hours of sleep and then probably a few more. He was barely aware of Louis sitting right beside him, their knees pressed and reminding him of the present. Reminded of the slight bout of attraction he felt towards his boss when he shouldn’t. It was a lost cause since Louis wasn’t as arrogant, sure, but he wouldn’t let anyone in his heart either. Harry would be heartbroken if he tried to pursue him and failed. It would be a lost cause, even if he had no intention to try in the first place. So he withdrew his knee, falling in on himself as he let out a soft groan.

“Alright, Styles?” Louis asked, in a tone softer than what the words usually accompanied.

“I think so,” Harry drawled, lolling his head to a side to look at him. He looked exhausted as well, crow’s feet by his eyes showing more clearly than before. His exhaustion was tucked into his smile, and it was strangely comforting to know he wasn’t alone in this. Even if Louis was the reason he was at all, in this. “I haven’t sat since we got off the boat. Just standing and talking and... I don’t want to finish this sentence. I’m sleepy, don’t feel like eating even.”

“I feel the same.”

“Boys, I don’t understand boys,” Gemma said with a heavy voice before sighing. “You could have left at any point and no one would have questioned it. Harry and his need to please everyone. But Louis, at least you should have told him.”

Louis chuckled. “He’s not my assistant here anymore. Thought I couldn’t command him.”

“You can never command me,” Harry drawled out and closed his eyes, knowing he made no sense. “I’m the boss.”

“You’re an idiot,” Gemma intoned and Harry finally opened his eyes to glare at her. She was standing in front of them with one hand on her hip and the other holding a tray full of hors d’oeuvres. Harry’s stomach grumbled hopefully, reminding him that he hadn’t eaten anything in hours. He hurriedly reached to snatch the tray from his sister, ignoring the two people laughing at him. Sure he had said he wasn’t hungry a few minutes ago but in his defence, he was being lazy. Gemma slumped beside Harry, picking food off his tray. “I knew you were hungry. Know you too well. So finish this and just sneak off to your room. Actually mom is tidying up there so she’ll call you so wait, don’t go just yet. Niall and Liam left in the commotion but told me to tell you they’ll text you tomorrow. And is there something else? Oh yeah, you’re pretty convincing, gotta say. That's all.”

“Thanks, Gemma,” Louis sassed as he had his fill of food before leaning back. “Must have taken a lot of energy to compliment me, huh.”

“I’m not going soft on you just yet, Tomlinson,” she retorted with a smirk. Louis was smirking back while Harry looked between the two of them, chewing his food slowly. “Keep watching your back.”

“Will do.”

Harry was still looking between the two of them, incredibly confused by the familiarity they had acquired, especially since Gemma had specified she wouldn’t be nice to him. This was as nice as she could get and same from Louis side. So...? “What happened between you two? When did you start acting... friendly?”

“On the patio,” they said at once before laughing. Harry was feeling exhausted, confused and hungry, so he didn’t overthink whatever this was. He kept eating until everything on the plate was finished and his tummy was full. He hadn’t known just how hungry he had been.

A few minutes later, Anne came down the stairs to call them up. Harry knew they were being lead to his old bedroom and was proven right when she opened the door. His room was larger than his entire studio apartment to say, but that was more due to the fact that his apartment was really small. This room had a large king sized bed in the dead centre, draped with blue sheets and surrounded by wardrobe and shelves on one side and tables and chairs on the other. There was a comfy looking, worn red patched sofa at the foot of his bed and he never understood where it was there. But he had never changed the arrangement of them room and grown used to its weirdness.

The French windows brought in natural light and it didn’t seem that it was late at night. He was used to the constant brightness before but after living in New York for three years, it felt a little strange. The windows opened up to a balcony and there was a great view of the sea, waves lapping up on the shore and bringing in cool breeze. Watching the waves calmed his down usually and it was exactly what he needed for the next two days that he’d spent here. Calmness, relaxation. Everything was just the same as he had left, except cleaner. It was aesthetical and impersonal, since he hadn’t bothered to add personal touches that would destroy the beauty of it.

“It resembles a Bed & Breakfast place,” Louis whispered in his ear, hand brushing Harry’s shoulder. The closeness brought up memories of their previous kiss and the one before and the... suddenly it felt too hot as his eyes darted down to Louis’ delectable lips. His smile died as he attempted to widen it. “You live so fancy, Harold.”

“It never seemed like that.” Harry shrugged, looking away. “It was always home.”

Louis hummed, lips quirking up as he stared out the window. “I understand that.”

“So the two of you get comfortable,” Anne said as she clapped her hands. “Harry, you know where everything is. Louis, don’t be shy. If there’s anything else you need just tell me and...”

Their attention was diverted by the snuffling sound by the door. And before Harry could turn his head, he saw a blurry white ball of fur running in through the door, yapping loudly. It headed straight towards Louis, trying to crawl up his legs and Harry squeaked at the sight. There was a new dog in their house, which was the epitome of fluff and was currently pawing at Louis’ slacks while the man stared down at it. Louis’ expression was hidden but Harry knew the job of lint rolling was coming his way. He didn’t want to listen to Louis go on about dog fur so he instinctively reached to pick the dog up. But Louis beat him to it, lifting the puppy up so he was cradling it in his hands. And to his surprise, Louis was smiling at it. What the...

“That’s Snow,” Anne informed, chuckling as Louis made an ‘aww’ sound at it. “We rescued him from the pound two weeks ago and he’s still in training so don’t mind him.”

“Why would I mind this cute creature,” Louis cooed, nuzzling his nose in Snow’s fur. Harry’s jaw dropped and Gemma chuckled in the background, laughing at him. “He’s a happy ball of fur, a sweet creature.”

“He is a cute dog, yeah?” Anne said as she laughed. “But don’t let him out for any reason. The nasty eagles are looking for a chance to snatch him up.”

Louis gasped dramatically before patting Snow’s head and smiled widely. “I’ll keep that in mind. My god, is he the cutest thing I’ve seen.”

Harry cleared his throat without thinking about it, making Louis look at him in amusement. “What about me?”

“Yeah what about you?” Louis asked before smiling cheekily. “You can’t call yourself cuter than this baby. He certainly beats you in cuteness.”

Harry felt offended, jealous of that dog in Louis’ hand which was lapping up all the attention he was showered. He narrowed his eyes, watching as Snow looked up adoring at Louis and licked his cheek. Harry wanted to do that but also... what. Why was he jealous of a dog? That was getting attention from Louis? What was wrong with him? Must be jet lag. He blinked quickly before tuning back in and realise his mom had been saying something.

“There are extra linens and towels in the closet,” she said, opening the door and showing him it. Harry nodded absently, catching Gemma’s eye. She looked smug, a knowing look on her face as if she wanted to corner him and talk. But luckily, it was late and she wouldn’t attempt it right now. “If you feel chilly, just take one alright. Otherwise everything is left the exact same.”

“Alright, thanks mom,” Harry said, hoping he looked normal and not bitter about Snow, who was getting intense love from Louis. His mother didn’t suspect anything, bidding them goodnight as she left, not before telling Gemma to leave ‘the couple’ alone.

“I’ll do that, mom,” Gemma replied, giving her an innocent smile before bursting into laughter the minute she left. “That was something.”

Harry ignored her, turning his attention to Louis and Snow, who looked more convincing as a couple. He narrowed his eyes, wishing he was the puppy as he crossed his arms. “I never thought you would be a dog person.”

“Hmm what?” Louis asked, holding Snow over his head and not looking away. Harry had a strong urge to stomp his feet.

“I always took you for a cat person, you know.” Harry felt flustered when Louis looked at him, cocking a brow. “You seem the type, lonely and detached. I don’t know I assumed.”

“I love dogs,” Louis stated as he crouched to let Snow down on the floor. “Never understood cats, really. But dogs... we’re on the same level I feel, like their big eyes understand me. Have I never told you that before?”

“No,” Harry said, jutting out his bottom lip and making Louis laugh. He was aware of Gemma in the back, noting it down to tease him later. He really wished she’d leave but of course she wouldn’t.

“Guess there are some things you still don’t know about me,” Louis said as he winked at him before letting go of Snow, who bounded up to Gemma and she picked him up. “To say only this morning you claimed you knew everything there is about me?”

“I thought you were a cat person,” Harry insisted, cheeks flushed. He was not being jealous before, just upset he was not in the know. That's all.

“I could watch your awkward conversations all night but I suggest you get some sleep,” she said before waving at them with Snow’s paw before cackling and walking out the door. “Goodnight, oblivious fools.”

It had been a long day, Harry thought as he closed the door. It was just him and Louis right now, alone. And Louis was a dog person. He still couldn’t understand.

“How do you like dogs?” he asked, feeling ridiculous when Louis stared at him blankly, eyebrows raised. The seconds stretched on and Harry sighed, running his fingers through his hair. “You know what I mean. You never seem to love anything that isn’t words.”

“Dog is a word, first of all,” he intoned, smirking as Harry made a grumbling sound before walking over to where their bags were kept, in one corner of the room. He crouched and without meaning to, Harry’s eyes flit down to stare at his ass before he shook himself out of it. “And of course I love things. I love my sister, love dogs and all. I’m just terrible at expressing emotions, which usually I count as a good thing. Can you imagine everyone knowing every single thought because it shows up on your face? Oh wait, yes you do.”

“Hey!” Harry protested, knowing it was true.

Louis laughed, shaking his head as he stood up, bundle of clothes in his arms. “We had a dog growing up and cried for days after she died. Anyway, I’ll just go and freshen up before I sleep. You don’t mind me, and change as well.”

“This is my house,” Harry said weakly before the bathroom door closed, and huffed. Louis was infuriating, he was. He was anxious one second and confident the next, being emotionless for years before showering all his love on dogs. He was a confusing person. And lack of sleep and hours of interaction with people made Harry a little woozy hence he headed for the couch and curled up on it. The familiarity of the uncomfortable red couch was calming him along with the soft sounds of waves in the distance. He rubbed his eyes with the back of his hand, humming under his breath as he waited for Louis to come out. He needed to piss before changing. Before he knew it, he was lulled into a semi sleep state, close to falling asleep but the couch was preventing it. He couldn’t sleep like this without getting a backache and tumbling off in the middle of the night.

“So I see you’ve made yourself comfortable then.” Louis’ raspy voice broke through, making Harry blink and sit up slowly. He watched Louis through heavy lidded eyes as he threw the previous clothes on top of his bag, not bothering to push it in. He was dressed up in a ridiculously soft looking hoodie and boxer briefs underneath, his curvy but strong legs exposed. Harry knew he was staring but hopefully it was masked somehow. “It’s nice of you to offer me the bed without fighting for it.”

“Wait,” Harry murmured before the sleep was all but gone from his eyes. He gaped at his boss. “I offered you the bed?”

“Thanks, Styles,” Louis said on a trill note, tilting his head to a side. He was giving Harry a wide, seemingly innocent smile and it was doing his job to disarm Harry. But he would not be giving up the bed, he thought as he continued to stare at the man. Louis was graceful in his motion, not taking his eyes off as he sat down on the left side of the bed. He fluffed up the pillows, looking away for a few seconds before he pulled his legs up and spread them before lying down backwards. Harry frowned, standing up. “This bed sure is comfortable.”

“Oh no way,” Harry whispered, loud enough for the other man to hear and lift himself up on his elbows. “You’re not getting the bed. It’s my bed.”

“But I’m your guest,” he countered, cocking a brow. “Shouldn’t you be the good host and give up the bed?”

“Yeah I’m the boss,” Harry replied lamely. “Of this trip at least and you have to do as told. So you take the floor. The couch will fit you though since you’re tiny.”

Louis narrowed his eyes, managing to look menacing even while lying down. “Take that back!”

Harry hummed, feeling delighted with the reaching. He didn’t break eye contact as he pulled off his shirt. “Uh no, I’m not. You’re tiny, accept it. Also, I’m sleeping on the bed.”

Louis eyes flicked down to his chest as he pursed his lips. “I’m not taking the floor for sure.”

“Your wish then,” Harry chirped as he pulled off his pants. Louis made a horrified face as he fell back onto the pillows, squeezing his eyes shut. “We’re sharing the bed.”

“What are you doing Styles?” His voice was squeaky, making Harry amused. “I never asked for a strip show from you.”

“I sleep naked,” Harry teased, laughing when Louis grumbled, cheeks flushing slightly. “Alright I’ll put on my pants.”

“And a shirt!” Louis shrieked. Harry laughed as he picked out a random shirt from his bag, which happened to be a faded, tattered looking vintage Rolling Stones shirt. Louis opened his eyes cautiously, immediately making a weird face at him, watching as Harry walked over to the right side of the bed and laid down. “Is that a shirt or pieces of cloth sewn together poorly, I can’t tell.”

“God you’re whiny,” Harry murmured, making Louis gasp and glare. He tilted his head to a side to grin at Louis and the man stuck out his tongue and flipped to the other side. Harry laughed, looking up at the ceiling. “Fine, if that's how you want to be.”

They laid in silence for a few minutes, Harry smiling as he closed his eyes. He was waiting for Louis to no doubt, break and speak up. He knew since the windows were pouring in sunlight and Louis was facing it. Harry was barely holding in his giggles as he counted up to five minutes and that's when Louis broke.

“Fine, just pull the curtains, will you?” Louis grumbled, voice muffled and huffy. Harry giggled softly as he picked up the remote beside the table and shut the windows. “Thank you. Goodnight, Styles and don’t even think of pushing me off.”

“I’ll try not to Louis,” Harry replied in the dark room. And it was quiet again, apart from the rustling sound when either of them moved. It was awkward for sure, with it being the first time Harry was in bed with Louis, his superior. Even if this was platonic, it was making Harry feel extra nervous and squirmy. But sleep overtook him long after Louis had started snoring, remembering the last thing he did was smile at the other man.

***


	5. Chapter 5

Louis was pretty sure he went to sleep on the left side of the bed, vowing to himself that he wouldn’t move an inch to the other side. Waking up, he wasn’t so sure about that. His eyes were still closed, the sleep getting away from him and he was aware of a heavy weight on top of him. He also had a mouthful of hair and someone breathing down on his neck, which lead to squint his eyes open. He was aware of two things then – one that he had moved to the centre of the bed and two that whatever was on top of him was holding him down. He couldn’t see but he was quite sure what the weight was, mainly since his arms were clasped around Harry’s waist. He had no idea how this happened.

Louis wiggled slightly, enough to make Harry mumble something against his neck and roll off him. But his arms coiled tighter around Louis’ waist and he buried his nose Louis’ collarbones and mumbled some more. The entire length of the right side of his body was currently enveloped by Harry and Louis knew there was no way he would be able to sneak out without waking up the lad. And awkward morning afters was something no one wanted, even though nothing had happened last night. So he sighed, closing his eyes for a few more minutes but he knew sleep wouldn’t return now.

So Louis once again attempted to escape the koala grip Harry had on him but Harry gripped tighter. See, he had known that Harry was an over sharing, boundary-less person but he had no idea he was such a fierce cuddler. He should have warned him not to cuddle while sleeping but he had assumed Harry would just kick him off the bed. That might have been better than this, since the cuddle was nice and Louis wanted to sink into the touch knowing he shouldn’t. He couldn’t give in to the warmth of the person beside him, knowing he’ll begin to crave for something more and that too with Harry, of all people. Not that Harry was bad or anything but... he was far too good for him. He deserved more. And now Louis was having an existential crisis, which was great to accompany his morning boner. He couldn’t blame his dick. It had been... too long.

He lied in the bed for a few more minutes, hoping Harry would wake up but no such luck. So he gently grasped Harry’s wrist, lifting it up from where it was wrapped around Louis’ waist and move it away. It brushed his half-hard dick in the process and Louis froze, praying that Harry didn’t wake up right now. He didn’t, since the man would sleep through an earthquake apparently so he moved Harry’s hand again so it was lying in the small space between them. Harry made snuffling sounds as he flipped onto his back, letting out soft snores. Louis took a few minutes to observe him, smiling at his parted lips and pillow creased cheeks. He was beautiful, Louis thought. It was a constant thought since years and as usual, he tore his eyes away knowing he couldn’t. It would be wrong and... unrequited. He was more worried about the latter part. Louis rolled off the bed and landed on his feet like a cat before sitting on the floor, looking out the window and then stood up. He rummaged through his bag and picked out a pair of sweats and a coat. He also stuffed his half-empty box of cigarettes and lighter in his pocket before he tiptoed out of the room.

Harry’s house was a great old mansion and Louis was sure there were secret passages he could get lost in. So he kept to the way they had come in, finding himself out on an open expanse of grassland. It was quiet and beautiful but Louis had never learnt to live without chaos so he felt a little uncertain. He lit a cigarette and pressed it between his lips. The first inhale felt heavenly and he closed his eyes as he blew out smoke. He usually never smoked except when stressed, and this seemed like a good enough reason to. Kissing Harry Styles and then waking up wrapped in his arms? Major life crisis. Even the thought was making his heart pound, so he took another drag instead as he watched the soothing rise and fall of the waves.

It might have been minutes or seconds but he did spy a distant figure from the corner of his eyes. Usually he wouldn’t pay them much heed but the person was also drawing closer. Still, he ignored them, knowing it was just one of the people from around hence wouldn’t bother him.

Peace was not in his cards since it was two minutes later when someone tapped him on his shoulder. Louis turned around to find it was Harry’s friend, Niall, with a dopey smile on his face. He was waving even though metres away, looking gleeful at... this hour.

“Hey Louis,” he chirped, looking pleasant at... again, he didn’t know what time it was but he assumed it was early. “I didn’t know you smoked.”

“I’m a mysterious person,” he replied, exhaling smoke away from the man before looking at him again. “But I don’t smoke much.”

Niall nodded gravely, as if he had said something noteworthy. This boy was strange, and quiet as well, compared to last night. Yesterday he was all screaming and excitement, but today he was subdued. “I took up smoking for a few months. It affected me health so I quit it. But Harry is against smoking, right?”

Louis chuckled, smile tugging at his lips. “Hates when I smoke, which was why I cut down a lot. This must be my first in days and I had to sneak away from him. He can be a real nag sometimes.”

“That’s Harry for ya.” Niall laughed, well naturedly, looking out at the sea as well. “Once he really cares for you, he really cares for you, know what I mean? I have no doubt he’d be a great assistant, and boyfriend. I’ve only seen him in two relationships, asshole for boys them but he was always so loving, until they broke up that is. He’s bad at picking men, at least he was. He’s lucky to have you, you seem to love him.”

“I do,” Louis said truthfully, admitting it the first time to anyone else. He wasn’t planning to admit it but, well it would sell the relationship part. And he did love Harry, or at least liked him more than an assistant. He had known it for months now but stifled the feeling quite well. Yeah the thought was scary since his last relationship wasn’t so good but it was scarier that his actions kept disappointing Harry so much. He didn’t know why he was willing to it admit it to Niall of all people but it helped that he was a stranger. “He’s charming in every sense of the way, breaking my walls down slowly without even meaning to. Just a bit clumsy, tripping over his big feet and then blushing about it. You don’t know how much I resist smiling. There’s never a mean bone in him, would kill himself trying to help people and god does that worry me. He’s so bloody nice, it’s like I don’t deserve him.”

“Hey don’t be crazy,” Niall chided, frowning as he placed his hand on Louis’ shoulder to turn him. “Mate, I’ve never seen Harry with stars in his eyes before or moving in sync with someone else. He bloody adores you, I can tell.”

‘You’re wrong,’ he wanted to say but settled with a smile. He dropped the cigarette to the ground and crushed the butt with his foot. “I should go inside. Harry might worry.”

“Oh nonsense,” Niall said, rolling his eyes. “I’m pretty sure he’ll do fine without you. And look outside, such a great morning. Let’s do something.”

Louis smiled due to his enthusiasm, in spite of himself. “What do you want to do?”

“You’re British right?” Niall asked, squeezing Louis’ shoulder as he looked on imploringly. Louis nodded, suddenly suspicious. “So you must be good at soccer. Will you play soccer with me?”

“Just you?” Louis asked, raising his eyebrows. He wasn’t sure of this, since he loved football, yes but hadn’t played it in ages. Probably not in ten years. “And I used to be good at footie in my teens but I’m not so sure now, Niall.”

“Don’t worry, I have a damaged knee so you can’t do worse than me.” Niall cackled as he flexed his knee and laughed, as if it tickled. He was a weird person for sure yet Louis found himself liking the lad. He was a jumping ball of sunshine so it was hard not to. “You do stretching or something and I’ll be right back with a ball. Don’t you dare move!”

And with that, Niall took off, flailing his hands around him. Louis laughed, clutching his stomach. It was strange that he felt so happy so early in the day but he wouldn’t mind a game of footie. It had been too long, but football was hopefully like riding a bike.

***

Harry woke up slightly disoriented and confused as to where he was, eagle spread in the middle of the bed. It took him a few minutes to get his bearing and figure out why his bed was so soft. And once he did, he sat up quickly and gave himself a head rush. Okay maybe he shouldn’t sit up that quick, he thought, massaging his forehead.

He looked around him with squinted eyes. There was no sign of Louis in the room, even though his stuff was spread in the corner. It was unlikely that he had flown back to New York to meet a prospective author, which would be a very Louis thing to do, so he must be around somewhere. The clock on the bedside table told him it was eleven in the morning which explained why his stomach was rumbling. So he pulled on a pair of sweatpants, flattened his hair and headed downstairs. As expected, the kitchen was deserted so he picked an apple from the fruit basket and munched happily on it as he walked into the living room. He looked around, expecting to find Louis there but unsurprised where he wasn’t. He must have ventured out somewhere then so did Harry, after throwing away the core. He opted not to wear any shoes, just used his hand to shield his face from the sunlight and walked onto the patio. He frowned when he heard the unmistakable, loud cackle of Niall’s, followed by a higher pitched one.

Harry followed the sound, getting used to the sudden brightness and was graced with the unexpected sight of Louis and Niall running around together, playing soccer apparently and laughing. He blinked furiously, unable to believe his eyes and pinched himself for good measure, realising it wasn’t just his dream. Louis was laughing as he played soccer like a pro with Niall running behind him. Although, Niall was hardly the one to be compared with due to his knee, which slowed him down. But the two of them looked like they were having a good time, dribbling the ball until Louis ultimately shot the ball through the makeshift goal. He cheered, throwing his hands in the air and was immediately enveloped by Niall in a hug. Harry might be too far to hear anything but it was as if Niall was bantering with him, which caused Louis to laugh.

Harry took a few minutes to admire what Louis was like happy and carefree. He was clearly winning but he was gentle with Niall, as if knowing about the knee. He checked up on him before grinning and snatching the ball with a loud cackle. Harry smiled without meaning to, shaking his head as he felt the enthusiasm. Louis was hardly dressed in appropriate clothing to play, wearing the sweats that hung low on his hip along with a hoodie from last night. He looked sweaty but gorgeous still, looking golden in the sun and more alive than he looked in years. Harry had unknowingly walked closer to him with a huge grin on his face and Louis noticed him, his grin brightening.

“Hey Harry!” he yelled as he jogged towards him. Niall noticed him as well, waving brightly as he walked closer as well. “You’re finally awake, I see. You were deep in sleep when I left and thought you’d be waking up the next day.”

“You’re playing soccer,” Harry said instead with awe in his voice, making Louis laugh and throw his head back.

“That’s good observation, babe, and good for you.” He picked up the ball and threw it at Niall, who caught it easily with a grin.

“Wanna join us, Harry?” Niall asked, eyes bright and eyebrows raised.

“Yes Harry, please join us.” Harry knew Louis was teasing him but he couldn’t help but consider it, looking down as his bare feet. But it wasn’t as if Louis was wearing shoes either, running around on the grass with bare feet. So it wasn’t how he could escape it.

“You’ve seen me, Louis, I’m hardly the best athlete.”

Louis shrugged as he smile, flicking his fringe to a side. “I know that, love but we can try, yeah? It’s never too late to learn.”

“If you say so,” Harry said, sighing dramatically. A voice in his head called him whipped and that voice was Gemma’s, surely. “But go easy on me.”

Louis raised his eyebrows and clapped his hands together. “How about this. The two of you, weak players play against me, strong player. Would that be even?”

Harry exchanged a look with Niall, who shrugged. “I guess so.”

Even together, Harry and Niall were no match for Louis. They tried their best but it was as if the ball was glued to Louis’ foot and his laugh rang in the air as he scored. Harry found himself cheering along when Louis won, and Niall nudged him to stop but he didn’t mind. Louis was a charismatic presence and it distracted Harry plenty, hence Niall had to yell at him multiple times to focus. After seven consecutive goals, Harry managed to snatch the ball from him and scored. Niall and Harry cheered exaggeratedly, with Niall trying to jump on top of them which led them to collapse on the grass, very close to the sea.

“Alright, the two of you can stop you scored once, I get it.” Louis rolled his eyes, looking cross that they scored that one goal at all. Harry dusted himself off, grinning cheekily.

“Are you upset that we won?”

“No,” Louis mumbled.

He didn’t see it coming when Louis walked towards him in quick strides, pushing him back so that he was falling right into the water. He coughed and spluttered as he surfaced, seeing Louis laughing again, clutching his stomach. Niall was laughing right alongside him, even if they were on the same team.

“That was unfair,” Harry objected, pushing his hair off his eyes as he glared. Louis was still smiling as he reached for him. “You’re such a sore loser.”

“I just like winning,” he said, shrugging unapologetically as he pulled Harry out of water. “What can I say?”

“That you’re a sore loser?” Harry repeated, trying to glare at Louis but failing since he looked cute. “This was uncalled for.”

“You were being too smug,” he countered, not letting go of his hand. “Someone had to take you down a notch. It was obnoxious.”

“I was being...” he started before taking a deep breath, knowing it wasn’t worth the effort. Louis would never give in. “I hate you.”

“Well guys,” Niall said, clapping to alert them of his presence. “I have to get going. Feeling hungry again so see you later. Liam and I are coming back at six, so you guys be ready, alright. No excuses!”

“Sure,” Harry agreed, the breeze feeling chilly and he resisted a shudder.

“Do you want my hoodie?” Louis asked, eyebrows furrowing as Harry wrapped his arms around himself. “Sorry I didn’t think it through.”

“Don’t worry, my house is just there so.”

Louis nodded, looking at him with concern until they were inside. Gemma was sitting on the sofa, looking up at them and bursting into laughter. Harry groaned internally, cursing his fate before he told Louis to head up. He agreed reluctantly, asking once again if he was sure and climbed upstairs and Harry assured him that he was. Gemma quickly returned with a towel, shaking her head as he dried his hair.

“How do you even get in situations like this,” she asked, her hands placed on her hip. Harry shrugged, wrapping the towel over his shoulders like a cape. “How do you just manage to be in a place you’ll get in trouble and not even complain when you’re in trouble?”

“He was having fun,” Harry said, shrugging. “Should I have yelled at him or something?”

“I’m not saying that,” she said slowly, as if considering her words. Harry narrowed his eyes, knowing what she’d be saying next. “I’m just saying you let him run all over you, all the time and just shrug it off like... why don’t you stand up to him. Not this thing, I agree it was a prank type thing. That's all right. But in general, Harry, you have to tell him to stop.”

“I know, Gemma I just.” Harry sighed, running his fingers through his hair and pulling on a few strands in frustration. “I can’t, don’t know how to. But Gemma, you didn’t see him out there today. He was just so radiant, so alive and I couldn’t look away from him. It was like seeing sunrise after a long night or the first ray of sunshine after a cold winter. I never knew he was that good at football since he never told me, but I got over that pretty quickly. I always knew he hated losing, but he’s so cute when he pouts, you know. It’s as if I’m seeing a whole new side to him out here. Can’t believe there are things I don’t know about him yet.”

“Oh my god,” Gemma whispered, almost to herself. Harry looked at her to find worried brown eyes staring back, searching his face for something. He felt judged, uncomfortable and he leaned away from her, frowning. “You love him.”

“No I don’t.” Harry scoffed, shaking his head. That would be preposterous. Why would Harry love Louis? He knew love and that was not it. It might be admiration.

“You sighed after you finished talking.”

“No I didn’t.”

“Yes you did.”

Harry threw his hands up in surrender, shaking his head as he stood up. “You know what, you’re wrong. Can’t two gay men pretending to be engaged just be good friends? Does it have to be romantic? Besides he’s my boss, I can’t do that. So I’ll excuse myself from this conversation. See you later, Gemma.”

“Harry, listen to me,” she said behind him but Harry didn’t stop. He walked away quickly from her and not stopping until he reached the door of his bedroom. He pushed it open, finding Louis standing by the bed with just a towel wrapped around his waist with water droplets trailing down his back. Harry gasped, alerting Louis of his presence and he turned, eyes widening. Harry’s eyes dropped, finding that Louis also had a large chest tattoo, right under his collarbones. He suspected there might be, since he had seen black ink peeking from beneath his collar but he didn’t know how hot it looked. He realised he was staring, with Louis staring back and frozen in spot. Harry let out a high squeaking, taking a step back.

“I’ll wait outside,” he managed to say before he backed out and closed the door, resting against it. He sighed, closing his eyes. He knew this image would never be forgotten and to be quite honest, he didn’t want to. Luckily, he hadn’t looked any lower, although he wished.

***

If anyone asked him, Louis would swear he didn’t know he landed on top of Harry. He especially didn’t know how and why they were kissing on the couch by the end of Harry’s bed.

But it was certainly due to something Harry had said, Louis was sure.

Lunch had been a happy affair, with the two of them dodging questions from Gammy and Anne while Gemma chortled into her food. Louis had held Harry’s hand throughout even when he didn’t have to and then wandered back up for a nap while Harry chatted with his sister. It was nice to be left alone, since Louis desperately needed some space from Harry. He never thought he’d be the one to say that.

It was six in the evening when it happened. The sun was still up high and the sky didn’t give away the time and Harry and Louis were fully dressed and waiting for their friends. Niall had texted that would directly head up so the two of them were sitting on the couch, with Harry teasing him. He claimed to have an upper hand in the situation and that it was good that Louis had listened and worn the jeans. He also complimented him, which may or may not have made Louis blush. He was only partly right, since Harry did have the upper hand but that didn’t mean it didn’t irk Louis. His hackles were raised the more Harry talked about having the most control in the situation and his competitive streak rose. Also his need to be in control grew strong. Louis could never resist a challenge, which might be his biggest flaw and currently his downfall. Without thinking much about it, Louis had placed one hand on the back of Harry’s neck and the other on his lips to cut him off. He was intending to remove his hand quick but then Harry licked his palm, making him draw it back quickly. Harry smirked and unwittingly, Louis’ eyes fell on his lips. His plush, red lips that he desperately wanted to kiss. It was Harry who ultimately lunged forward to close the distance between them and shifted closer to him. Louis moaned as he bit on Harry’s lower lip, acting on instinct and need without thinking it through.

When logic kicked in, he did try to draw back but Harry was quicker, chasing his lips with a whine and things got a little hazy after that.

Before he knew it, Harry had pushed him back on the couch, his legs locking around Louis’ waist. Louis felt high on Harry’s lips, tasting the vanilla ice cream he had earlier and something that was incredibly him. He could feel his heartbeat loudly in his chest and Harry’s hands roaming over his back and arse. He realised that Harry had grown loose and plaint beneath him, making these small noises that shot straight to his dick. Despite how Harry asserted he wanted dominance all week, he really liked when Louis took control. So that was an interesting and good development.

In the coming few hours he might regret his decision but not then, since all he felt was the flutter in his stomach and the feel of Harry underneath him.

The moment was rudely broken when someone cleared their throat loudly and pointedly. It was enough to break through Louis’ daze and bring him crashing down to reality as his eyes flew open. Harry was oblivious to it, moaning underneath him as his fingers further twisted in Louis’ hair. But Louis felt the eyes on his back now, probably judging him so he nudged Harry’s hip to alert him of the fact as well. Harry’s legs loosened their grip around him as his eyes fluttered open. Louis’ gaze flitted down to his lips, swollen and parted and too enticing. But Louis had to look away, twisting to find Liam and Niall standing by the open door with matching, wide smirks on their faces. They were obviously under the impression that Harry and Louis were in love and engaged so they were just here to tease. But Louis knew better, knew that not something they did. The realisation was equivalent to being doused in cold water hence he scrambled back and sat up. Harry was still spread on the couch, looking wrecked and confused. He blinked slowly before looking at the door, inhaling sharply as he pushed himself up as well.

“This is not what it looks like,” he told his friends, cheeks turning a darker shade of red. Louis’ heart hurt by the statement, feeling that subtle hint of rejection. This meant nothing. It was just a competitive thing to prove themselves the boss, even if it seemed anything but. He didn’t know what had gotten into him at that point, but he certainly wouldn’t let it happen again. He wouldn’t let his guard down again.

So he discreetly wiped his lips with the back of his hand, guilt and dejection welling up in his chest and bringing him down. There was a night of going out somewhere but he didn’t feel like doing that right now. He felt like sleeping for a few hours as he moped in the comforts of his flat. But since that wasn’t possible, he had no choice but to keep a poker face again. Wouldn’t be hard.

“Surely Louis wasn’t trying to strangle Harry,” Liam teased and winked exaggeratedly. Harry managed to get more flustered by that, looking away from them. Louis noticed how his hand twitched and reached towards him but in the end he pulled his palm away. He ignored the hurt expression on Harry’s face, telling himself he was doing the right thing by not leading anyone on any further. “But it’s nice that you’re kissing now because later you won’t be able to. Mainly because we won’t allow it. If the two of us don’t find partners to kiss then neither can you. It would only be fair.”

“We can manage fine without kissing,” Louis murmured softly, making Harry frown as he shifted further away.

“And yeah there are two of you so,” he suggested, expression innocent and a little troubled. Well, as innocent as one could look with swollen lips and blown out pupils. Louis felt proud that he was the one to cause it but pushed the pride down so he didn’t feel that. Harry looked so wrecked already, a complete mess and Louis knew he was going to have a tough night resisting him.

“Oh fuck off,” Niall said, rolling his eyes as he grabbed Harry’s arm. He looked pointedly at Louis, humming in approval that they were already dressed. “Now hurry your ass up. It’s already ten minutes past six.”

Was it? Louis knew it was one minute past six when they were having that conversation which led to the kissing. It was strange how quickly time flew past. He absently touched his tingling lips as he stood up and followed the trio. He was alright trailing behind them since he was still reeling from that kiss. He didn’t want to get involved in their discussion as he was trying to get himself together. Usually he had no problem being calm and collected but right now he could barely look away from Harry. The bloke was laughing at something Niall said, the column of his throat exposed. Louis wanted to bite it but couldn’t so he merely stared. He was allowed to sneak looks since they were pretend fiancés, he told himself. But when Liam caught his eyes, he blushed anyway and looked away. It might be why he didn’t notice the boat until it was too late and Niall was already climbing in.

“The boat again?” Louis shrieked, digging in his heel to stop. Niall and Liam barely spared him a glance as they climbed in but Harry did stop. He was giving Louis an intense, worried look as he pinched his lip between his fingers. The sight was very, very distracting. “Why do we have to get on the boat?”

“The pub is on the other side,” Niall explained before chuckling, seating himself in the back. “And we can’t swim that far.”

“I hate the boat,” Louis muttered under his breath, walking closer. The boat seemed so small and unstable, floating over the waves and he was worried he’d topple over. There was one time he had almost drowned on a rowboat. So after that, he stayed away from deep water and boats. Of course he had to board one twice in twenty-four hours, once more which coming back. He was feeling anxious as he stared at the giant thing, eyeing it critically. He was taken by surprise, heart skipping a beat as Harry clutched his hand and squeezed in an effort to soothe him.

“You can sit in the front with me,” Harry said softly, his thumb rubbing circles on the back of his hand. “I’m driving, actually, so just sit beside me and look at the horizon, alright?”

Harry’s concerned green eyes were pinning him to the spot, making him forget how to breathe and he probably nodded but couldn’t be sure. Harry held his hand as they climbed into the boat and didn’t complain when Louis gripped his hand tightly. He cast worrisome looks while he... what was the term to use there where he drove (sailed) the motorboat towards the shore? He couldn’t be too sure but Harry glanced worrying at him. Louis tried not to look affected by it but it was hard not to, so he fingered the hole in his jeans. Harry had been right before when he said he looked good in jeans. But the skin-tight jeans were very unfamiliar to him, cutting off the blood in his legs. It had been uncomfortable to squeeze in them, mainly because of his arse but he appreciated the effort. Harry managed to wear them so often, it was a wonder his legs and balls weren't blue yet. Although, he shouldn’t be thinking about Harry’s balls.

But he was doing fine despite everything, he told himself. He was wearing a half-sleeved white shirt with the words ‘not heartbroken’ on his chest. It was the shirt he had bought after, well... he’d rather not talk about it. But it served as a reminder for him, basically and he was to abide by it.

As Harry had instructed, Louis kept his eyes on the horizon and the approaching town, feeling his heart hammer every time the boat jerked. He let out a sigh of relief when he finally stepped out and climbed the ladder.

“So there’s only one pub in town,” Niall said, clapping his hands together and making Louis snap his eyes towards him. He pointed in the far distance. “It’s that Irish pub you see there and it’s the only one around. It’s also a family business. So let’s go.”

Harry caught Louis’ hand again and dutifully held it as they walked the short distance to the pub. Louis felt it was a casual thing, where they walked hand in hand like that all day. In informal clothing. It felt natural, not forced and it was worrying in itself. Why were they so comfortable? Why did their hands slot together as if they were meant to be. Thinking about it was driving him just a little mad.

The pub was a little crowded but they had a booth free in the back. There were mostly older gentlemen, who greeted them loudly. The other three even waved at them and smiled. So Louis ducked his head and followed them to the booth and sat beside Harry. The lights were reflecting beautifully off Harry, bathing him in a golden light that made his skin almost sparkle. He was staring again, he knew and blushed when Harry looked back but didn’t look away. Niall brought them all a round of shots, claiming it was on him and for Harry and Louis’ engagement. Louis was a little reluctant to drink, since he hadn’t had a drink outside of business parties for years. There were a few drinks at the parties he attend, taking just two to seem polite. But shots, he wasn’t so sure about them.

He glanced at Harry, who seemed enthusiastic about the prospect as he gulped down his in one go. Louis was transfixed, staring at the exposed column of his throat and how his Adam’s apple bobbed when he gulped. His gaze trailed down his chest, where his shirt was gaping enough to show off his tattoos. If Harry continued to be like that then it would be a long night. So Louis gulped down the drink quickly. It might not be such a bad idea to get drunk after all. Niall cheered when Louis announced the same while Harry stared at him in surprise.

***

Harry had certainly never seen Louis so sloshed.

Sure he had seen and handled a very tipsy Louis one time, which had resulted in him smacking a kiss right on Harry’s lips. He had promptly fallen asleep, right on him. Harry had been surprised and on the verge of kissing back, which should be insane so he had shook his head and merely picked the man up. He then carried him to bed and tucked him, smiling at his sleeping, peaceful form before leaving. The incident was never mentioned again so Harry assumed Louis didn’t remember it. He had been dying to mention it but didn’t and it had happened over a year ago, a distant memory. It had also happened right after a stressful journey to that place and a mix of too much champagne and too less sleep, so Louis had most definitely forgotten it. But he couldn’t, even if he wanted to and as he watched Louis’ throat as he downed more drinks, he remembered it more clearly than ever.

Louis’ eyes were glazed and cheeks flushed. He was more giggly, laughing at everything Niall said and touching Harry almost constantly. He had matched Niall drink for drink so both of them looked like complete messes, laughing incessantly. He pressed his lips to Harry’s shoulder to stifle his laughter and Harry held himself completely still then, not quite drunk but certainly very dazed. Liam, like Harry, had opted not to drink too much so he was watching them with sharp, narrowed eyes.

“Harreh,” Louis whispered right into his ear, nibbling on his earlobe before giggling again. His arms were thrown around Harry’s neck to pull him in and Louis nuzzled his neck, sending delicious tingles up Harry’s spine. He held Louis’ waist and turned towards him, gently pulling the glass out of his hands and placing it on the table. They were pressed together, with Louis almost sitting in Harry’s lap. Drunk Louis was clingy, Harry noted, while being extremely cute. He was silly, loud and extremely clingy. “How can an adult like you be so damn cute? And hot at the same time. You look and talk like a toddler and move like a flower. How is that?”

“You’re making no sense right now, Lou,” Harry murmured, smiling when Louis scrunched his nose up. Harry was well aware he was blushing due to his words. Even in the weird roundabout way, he called Harry cute and that was something. He was desperately trying to pretend that this closeness was a common occurrence, for the sakes of his friends but his heart was hammering in his chest, trying to break free. This was brand new, a different side to him what with the way Louis was giggling, pressing a subtle kiss on Harry’s shoulder. The attention showered on him made him flustered and he had never known just how much he wanted it. He was pretty sure he had stars in his eyes as he looked at his pretend fiancé, knowing it would look all right to anyone but him. He was taking Louis in, from his dopey smile to the sweat sheen on his forehead to how his lips were red and he licked them every few minutes. Louis was a distracting sight and Harry didn’t want to look away, hungrily taking him in. He found it hard to not lean in and capture his lips. He had found the courage once before and wasn’t sure he’d attempt it twice so soon. But he could still feel the memory of Louis’ lips and craved for them more.

“I think we should leave now, Lou,” Harry whispered, eyes intent on his glazed over blue eyes. Louis pouted, clearly not wanting to leave. “It’s getting late and you’re drunk. We need to get some water and food in you else you’ll get a headache. You won’t like it.”

“You’re drunk,” Louis protested weakly but slid off the booth nevertheless, swaying on spot before he clutched to the table. Harry immediately wrapped his arm around Louis’ waist and felt giddy when Louis leaned in, placing his head on his shoulder. “Okay bye boys. Harry is taking me home now.”

“Yeah,” Harry croaked, getting flustered as Niall cackled. Liam was smirking, shaking his head knowingly. But there was nothing to know, nothing to happen and Harry felt sad. Louis’ words were literal, he meant nothing. It felt hollow in his chest still and he craved for something he didn’t know. He wished he could knock back a couple more shots, but then he did have a boat to drive. “I’ll be back to drive the two of you later.”

“Yeah don’t worry about it,” Liam said waving his hand before hurrying to snatch the drink out of Niall’s hand in warning. “You need water, not more alcohol!”

Harry didn’t wait to see what happened next. He had a tipsy Louis in his arms, who squirmed more into him as they stood. So gently, he led Louis out of the dimly lit pub and out the door, right into the bright sunlight. It was a little harsh on his eyes, making them stop to get used to it before they started walking again. Louis righted himself, leaning a little away but not to completely free himself from Harry’s grasp.

“You hate me, don’t you?” Louis asked, laughing to himself. Harry frowned, looking at him from the corner of his eyes. Louis was looking straight ahead, a sad tilt to his lips but he was still impassive as ever. Harry didn’t know where this was coming from. Had he said something before? “I mean everyone hates me, but I don’t care about them. But I do care what _you_ think of me, Harry. There are only two people besides you who I care about. And you hate me. My life is sad.”

“It isn’t sad,” Harry insisted even though it just might be. It wasn’t as if what Louis was saying was out of nowhere. He has seen the sadness in his eyes, each time they were alone working at nights. There always was a sad tilt to his lips whenever someone talked about a significant other or family and even if Louis pretended not to hear, he had ears like a bat. Harry didn’t know why he tended to isolate himself but he knew Louis did it on purpose just to regret it. Not that he ever asked about it but right now it did seem like he was being told about his regrets. This was a ‘getting to know you’ session he always wanted. “It’s alright to talk to less people. Even I do that. Few best friends are better than a bunch of fake friends, right?”

“You don’t understand, Harry,” he started as he tried to pull away. Harry let him, since fighting him would make both of them actually trip. He kept his hands outstretched to catch but Louis was, for most parts, steady on his feet. He seemed frustrated though, pinching the bridge of his nose and frowning. “You have people who care for you, like your family and friends. But whom do I have? And whom do I care for? I lost my family when I was seventeen. That's a young age to lose someone, even if you are an adult. Before the accident, I had plans to leave for the States for further education, full scholarship and all. I couldn’t let go of it after, since it was my only ticket to a good job. So I had to leave my sister with my aunt and move to New York alone, work two jobs and adjust to the change. I couldn’t meet her for years, except via Facetime. Between work and educations, I had time for nothing else. I made no new friends, didn’t keep in touch with the old ones and before I knew it, it was too late. I didn’t have time for a relationship, friendship or myself. I forgot how to make time for myself.”

Louis’ voice broke at the last word and Harry felt his heart break, right where he stood. It was as if all the pain and loneliness Louis felt was said in that one sentence and Harry didn’t know how to deal with it.

“Louis.” He reached out to hold the other man’s hand, but Louis took a step back, shaking his head. His eyes were misty and he looked like he was blinking back tears. Harry felt a pang of hurt in his heart, feeling unable to comfort him in the time of need.

“I’m fine,” Louis said, rubbing his eyes and smiling half-heartedly. He walked towards the ladder, intending to climb it down probably and Harry hurried after him. “I’m also drunk so ignore me.”

“Baby,” Harry said as he wrapped his fingers around Louis’ wrist. It made him halt, close his eyes as he sighed. He knew arguing with Louis was not an option, especially not since he was getting sober and a little more caged. “Lou, let me climb down first okay? Just stand here and wait.”

Louis nodded, biting his lip and taking a step back. “Okay.”

Harry didn’t let the surprise of Louis adhering to him affect him as much as he climbed down, aware of Louis’ eyes on him. It made him stumble on the last step, cheeks flushed as he looked up at Louis’ questioning blue eyes. Harry nodded and Louis nodded back, turning around as he climbed down. Harry kept his arms outstretched, sure Louis would fall down. But he didn’t. He was the epitome of grace, not missing a step before he jumped and only then stumbled into Harry’s arms. Louis giggled, surprisingly and just stayed there as they swayed on spot. Harry was very confused by drunk Louis, which wasn’t any different from sober Louis, really. Sober Louis was scared of the ladder and stumbled but drunk Louis didn’t, and it was strange, so strange. He didn’t know how the older man managed to confuse him so thoroughly just by existing.

“We have to get on the boat,” Harry whispered cautiously, bracing himself for a pouting Louis. The man surprised him by kissing his cheek and heading towards the boat himself. Harry stared at his back for a few seconds but hurriedly catching him around the waist and pulling him back. “I don’t understand you.”

“No one does.” Louis laughed, almost self deprecatingly. He insisted on sitting in the back, making things more difficult for Harry as per usual. He cast the drunk man a wary look before strapping a life jacket on him. Louis didn’t protest, just adjusting it on his shoulder. He didn’t look as drunk as before even if his eyes were slightly glazed and cheeks flushed. He looked comfortable enough hence Harry sat ahead to drive the thing.

“You’ve seen me single ever since you started working for me, right?” Louis asked, surprisingly comprehensible despite himself. Harry nodded, looking over his shoulders for a few seconds to see Louis looking back at him with a strange expression. He looked ahead again. “I had a boyfriend who I met in the last year of Uni. We were really good together, I loved him. Or at least thought I did... I don’t know I buried my feelings after that. I was mostly happy during that time, I think.”

“Yeah?” Harry asked as he glanced behind him. Louis looked comfortable sitting there although he did look sad as he reminisced his past. His voice had grown quieter, could barely be heard over the motor and waves but Harry tried. “Then what happened?”

“He broke up with me,” Louis said as he laughed, sounding a little manic. “I got this great job to intern at Colden Books and spent a lot time and put my all into it, you know how I am. Then I got a permanent job and I think he got jealous, I don’t know since he was still unemployed? He told me that it wasn’t working between us anymore because I didn’t give him enough time. Told me that I was working too much and forgetting him. Honestly, I didn’t care, which was a sign and we broke up. So after that, in revenge, I worked harder just to spite that part of him in my head, secured clients and all. With a little help from James, I rose higher and now I’m the topmost, aren’t I? I succeeded. But I think I forgot how to act with people during that journey, spend the remaining time on myself or pursue a hobby. Besides work and gym, I can’t do a thing. I can’t act like a person.”

“I think you’re being hard on yourself,” Harry yelled over the sound of the motor. He was concentrating hard on the sea ahead of his but he could still hear Louis’ scoff of disagreement. He didn’t know why but he felt protective of the man behind him. “No listen to me. Yes sure you work yourself to death and loneliness and have pulled me into your thing as well. Yes I resent you for it sometimes. But I never thought you couldn’t be a... person. You are a person, Louis and a good one at that. I never just bluff. You try to be this icy-exterior guy but you’re just not. You’re soft on the inside, you care when you have to. Latest example is that sweater, you knew I would need one. Which says a lot about me actually. That’s just not all, you randomly gift me things while acting flippant and giving far fetched excuses. And who says you don’t have anyone to care for you.” Harry smiled, shaking his head. This might be the most he had talked to Louis in one stretch, that didn’t involve business. “You have me. I care for you a lot. More than I should. In fact I think I lo–”

“Harry!” he heard Louis scream but it sounded far away. Harry turned around in surprise, finding the back of his boat empty and looking up he found a blob in water. He heard another shriek, with the person waving his arms and realisation dawned.

“Fuck,” Harry muttered under his breath, turning the boat around quickly. Louis couldn’t swim and somehow, he was in the water. Fuck indeed. “I’m coming for you, Louis, just hold on!”

When had Louis fallen off and how? How had Harry not heard the splash over the motor? Also, how much had Louis heard? The last question bugged him until he caught the sight of Louis, his head barely above water as he flailed.

“I’m going to drown!” Louis yelled, sounding closer than before. Harry bit his lip, guilt welling in his chest as he focused on Louis’ waving arms. Luckily, Harry had the forethought of putting the life jacket on him so he hadn’t drowned yet. “I’m a dead man!”

“You’re alive and I’m here for you, Lou!” Harry screamed despite having no reason to. He was there, killing the engine before staring at Louis who was throwing him a murderous glare. Harry looked around the boat, eyes falling on a rope and he sighed happily. He tied one end of the rope to the boat and looked back at Louis. “I’ll save you.”

“Is this a revenge for this morning?” Louis asked, arms flailing wildly around him. “Is that why I’m in the water? It’s unfair, if that. You know I can’t swim.”

“I didn’t do this on purpose,” Harry deadpanned, eyebrows furrowed in worry as he threw the other end towards Louis. It was only a few inches short of him but close. “Now grab on to the rope and pull yourself closer.”

“How do I do that?”

“Kick your feet and push yourself further!”

“Can’t swim,” Louis grumbled loudly as he kicked his feet, probably. “I can’t do this. Harry, help me I’m drunk and I’ll drown. No one will find my body and Lottie would be upset. I knew I’d die due to water.”

“Stop being so dramatic!” Harry rolled his eyes when Louis glared at him again but he did make an effort to kick his feet and propel himself further. “That’s like it, baby, you can do this. Move towards me, just a little distance, that’s like it!”

“I fucking hate you,” Louis yelled as he grabbed on to the rope. Harry chuckled, shaking his head. “Now pull me up.”

“Don’t get your knickers in a twist,” Harry told him, smirking when Louis threw curses at him. Harry pulled the rope and Louis closer until he was close enough that Harry could reach out and pull him up. Louis seemed shaken but a lot sober as he sat on a seat, arms wrapped around himself and completely drenched. His shirt was sticking to his skin, being see-through now and Harry couldn’t stop staring. He looked away when Louis glared, clearing his throat. “Safe and sound.”

“I’m never stepping on this boat ever again,” he grumbled, looking like a petulant child.

“You kinda have to when we go back to the airport tomorrow,” Harry reminded him with a smile as he finished sending a text to Gemma. He had called her to the bridge with a towel and she had agreed after a little coaxing from his side.

“After that I will never. Never ever.”

“Suit yourself,” Harry replied, shrugging as he started the boat again. He cast worried glances at Louis, who was shivering, with his hair plastered to his skull and clothes stuck to his body. They weren’t very far away though and soon he could see his house drawing closer and spotted the telltale shape of his sister standing on the bridge. Harry gave her a grateful smile while she glared, helping Louis out of the boat with care. “I have to go back to get Liam and Niall. Can you please get him warm clothes?”

“I’m not a baby,” Louis grumbled while Gemma laughed.

“Sure, baby bro,” she chirped while Louis handing a towel. Louis wiped his face before wrapping the towel around himself like a cape and shuddered. Harry watched him worriedly, reluctant to leave Louis behind in this state. “Oh come on, I can get him home safely. Don’t you ever trust me?”

“I do,” he said slowly, pouting at Louis’ shivering figure. He had caused it. He didn’t want to leave. But Gemma was giving him a menacing look and he knew what would entail if he didn’t give in so he sighed, shaking his head. He’ll be honest, Gemma and Louis were a lot alike when it came to command and control. He didn’t know how to feel about it. “Alright, I’ll leave. But get him warm soon. Sick Louis is a mess Louis.”

“I’m right here!” he squawked, throwing his hands up.

Harry shook his head once again, before he started the boat. He knew Gemma could take care of Louis but he still worried. Louis got cold easy and once he was sick, he was a bossy mess. Worse than usual, that is. It would be just half hour now until he got back, he thought.

It didn’t hit him until later, on the ride back that he had almost confessed his love to Louis. He didn’t even know he loved Louis before but he was about to tell the man that. And now that he was headed to him, he had to face him. And boy was he was panicking.

***


	6. Chapter 6

“Remember you always get in return what you have given to the world,” Gemma said in a ‘wise voice’ as soon as Harry had driven away (what was the right terminology here?). Louis shot her a withered glance, making her break character as she laughed, walking away with a spring in her step. Despite the late hour, she seemed to be happy and well, Louis could relate. Not right now, since the night was full of sunlight and his clothes were soaked in water but usually, he was more cheery at nights. Or sad, depending on the day he had. “But I never thought you’d jump off a boat while drunk. That's something.”

“I didn’t jump,” Louis murmured, pulling the towel closer to him as a gust of wind blew. He regretted the decision to sit in the back more than anything, right now. He knew boats were a bane for him, knew he’d die by falling off one. And he nearly had as well, if not for the life jacket. He was going to wear the jacket on the way back as well, just in case he tripped over again. He hoped he didn’t, since it was a bad, bad experience. “I was standing and about to say something to Harry when we went over a large wave I guess and I lost my balance and fell over. Harry was going on and on about... wow I don’t even remember that due to the fear of falling into the sea. I would have to ask him.”

“Maybe he was singing sonnets about how wonderful you are,” Gemma teased, as she pushed the door of their mansion open and slipped in but not before winking at him. Louis rolled his eyes. But to think about it, that was almost exactly what Harry was doing. He was consoling him and Louis was to object. Oh right. “So we’re in. I don’t want to guide you up to your room and pick out fresh clothes for you like Harry does. So this is where we part ways.”

“He doesn’t do that,” Louis said in a lieu of response, the shiver passing through him stopped him from making a clever comeback. But in the comforts of home, he felt a little toasty already. He unwrapped the towel from around it and wrapped it over his hair, drying it. “I pick out my own clothes. He just... packs for me.” He frowned, realising how that sounded. He shouldn’t let Harry pack his clothes, ever again. He was too sweet and Louis shouldn’t use it to his advantage. Henceforth. “I think I’m going to take a hot bath. I can do that, right?”

“I mean if you want to,” she said slowly, sceptically as she tilted her head to a side. “But why do you want to take a hot bath now? Aren’t you drenched in water?”

“Cold water,” Louis corrected, raising his eyebrows for emphasis. “And hot water bath solve everything, help me sleep better. And now that I’m sleeping with your brother... no not that way Gemma!”

Gemma was laughing, finding amusement in his poor choice of wording. Louis wished. But he wouldn’t say that so he walked towards the stairs, ignoring Gemma’s laughter behind him.

“I’m going to go, Gemma,” he said over her laughter, waving faux cheerily. “Thank you for everything, see you tomorrow. And the clock tells me it’s night even though it doesn’t look like. So goodnight!”

Louis ran up quickly as he could without tripping, gripping the towel tight as he ignored whatever Gemma was saying behind him. She wasn’t yelling, as he expected her to but she might have, if it was any other hour. Louis didn’t know how he came to know her so well, or he claimed to. He sighed as he entered the now familiar room, throwing the wet towel in the middle of the room as per habit before toeing off his shoes. He walked into the bathroom and filled up the large bathtub before adding two drops of the lavender oil that was in the cabinet. He felt glad when his soggy clothes were off, even if the jeans were very hard to remove and almost moaned when he sank into the warm comforts of hot water. He closed his eyes, resting his head against the cool porcelain and took a deep breath in.

Gym and the subsequent baths were the highlight and comforts of Louis’ days, not that he’d reveal he took baths. He felt relaxed already, trying to forget the blurry events of a few hours back. He would probably have a headache tomorrow or maybe not. It was very strange being around people who liked him, strange being around Harry who wasn’t nervous about his reactions. He smiled at the mere thought of Harry but the warm water was lulling him into a state of almost sleep so it could be that. Harry was beautiful.

He didn’t know how long it had been in the tub but he had a feeling it was long enough. Louis had to get out and wear some clothes before Harry came back, since he was pretty sure he hadn’t locked the door and if he was to come in, he would see everything. So that should be avoided. He got out reluctantly, instantly missing the warmth of his bath as he looked around for another towel. To the absolute horror of him, there was no spare towel for him. And he had been stupid enough to not bring one.

“Fuck,” he muttered under his breath as he wiped his forehead with the back of his hand. He scanned the bathroom once again, hoping he’d find something but nope, nothing. He glanced at his wet clothes on the floor before frowning. “Not getting into that again. It was hard enough to pull those darn jeans up my arse when they were dry, won’t do it now. But what should I do? Fuck.”

Louis was well aware he was speaking to himself but that's what he did in an extreme state of distress. Like right now. He grabbed the hand towel and shrugged. It would do for now, he thought as he wiped his face first and then his arms before dabbing his still damp hair. He left the towel on the sink, tiptoeing towards the door and pulling it open just enough to peek out. The room was empty, with no sign of Harry so that was good. He pulled the door open wider, pushing his head out to check the room once again and it was empty. He cheered mentally and since his luck was just that shitty, the door to the room opened with a creek. He cursed mentally, shutting the bathroom door and closed his eyes shut. He heard barks outside his door, happy barks too and Louis smiled shaking his head as he opened the door once again.

“Hey Snow,” Louis cooed, smiling at the small, happy dog that was scratching the door. Seeing Louis, he tried to rub his nose against his legs and Louis pulled away with a squeak. “Not the time, Snow. I’m naked.”

The dog didn’t understand him, yelping happily and Louis smiled, unable to resist its charm. Louis pulled the door open wider, tiptoeing towards the closet with Snow running circles around him. There was a happy dog and puddles of water left behind by his feet – a double threat for him. But as long as he was walking carefully, he wouldn’t trip, he reasoned as he opened the closet. But before he could pull out a towel for himself, he heard a different kind of yelp behind him. Specifically, a human yelp and Louis turned around before he froze.

When Harry entered his house again, he was on the edge. He had had a while to himself, a little time away from Louis to think. And now that he had thought about it, (which had resolved absolutely nothing) he didn’t know how to face Louis. There certainly were some feelings he harboured for Louis that existed somewhere in his chest, buried deep inside with denial. And now that they had made their way up once, Harry didn’t know how to push them down again. The fact was worrisome. He braced himself as he climbed up the stairs, heart hammering in his chest only to find that there was no one in the room currently. There was a wet towel on the floor though and Harry smiled as he picked it up and laid it on the chair to dry. He was sure that Louis had been here but the room was still empty so he might have gone downstairs again. He took the opportunity to do his old calming activity – watching the waves. He took off his jeans, took out his earphones from his bag and put on his usual calming playlist on full volume before heading out into the balcony. His eyes traced the waves and how they crashed on the shore before retreating, and it was soothing. He closed his eyes, breathing in the fresh salty smell and smiled, feeling content. Oh home.

Harry didn’t know what to do with the whole ‘I’m in love with Louis’ situation but the least he could do was act normal. He could look at Louis and not stare, could talk to him without confessing that there might be something more he wanted. He could totally do that. Besides it was obvious that Louis didn’t feel the same about him, so talking with him about it would be useless. All right there might be physical attraction that Louis might feel because not to brag, but Harry was a handsome man and was aware of it. Over the years, Louis had never shown any hint of attraction and neither had he expressed on the trip. Since they only had to work for a few more weeks until Louis promoted him, he’d rather it be not awkward. Soon they wouldn’t see each other that often and Louis would find himself a new assistant to help him out. Harry would be working under someone else, or maybe by his own self. And Louis would have someone else. It should feel relieving, yet the nameless, faceless competitor made a wave of jealousy wash through him. He sighed. This would not be easy.

With his earphones still on, he walked into the room, intending to check if Louis was there and immediately let out a quite girlish squeak. In his defence, it was warranted. Since Louis was there alright just...

He took out one of his earbuds and Snow’s barking suddenly was heard. He noticed the fluffy dog barking happily as he tried climbing Louis’ leg and failed. Louis’ very bare, beautiful and shapely leg which had a spider web tattoo on his shin and a smiley up his thigh, which had crossed out eyes. Harry was not jealous of the dog again, he was not. His eyes immediately landed up on Louis’ panicked face, noticing the hair plastered to his forehead and flush to his cheek. There were puddles of water trailing behind him, starting from the bathroom. It was the one place he didn’t think Louis would be at, which was silly of him. This was great. He had realised he liked Louis not more than an hour ago and there he had a wet, naked Louis in front of him. Harry couldn’t take his eyes off him even if he tried and how fitting was the song in his ear. Roy Orbison was singing about a pretty woman and there Louis was. This was not helping him at all.

Without thinking much of it Harry let his eyes trail down Louis’ face, past the dip of his collarbones that were deep enough to take shots out of. He had a toned body and defined muscles even if it never really seemed he did and it might be all the time at the gym he spent. It was working for him. There were a litter of tattoos over his arm that Harry had a glimpse of before but hadn’t known were quite so much of. There was a huge ass stag on his bicep and ‘It Is What It Is’ written in cursive letter spread on the entirety of his chest. His gaze went past his soft tummy and down to Louis’ dick, and as expected, he was well endowed. That myth about feet telling you about a man’s dick size was totally wrong. Louis might have small feet but his dick was certain thick and large. Harry wanted to put his mouth on it and probably have it in him. Snow’s bark broke through his thoughts, that were certainly getting filthier and he realised he had been staring. Heat flooded in his cheeks (and maybe down south as well) and he darted his gaze up to find Louis cover his nipples. There must be something in Harry’s expression, no doubt his dilated pupils that made Louis remember to cover his crotch instead and squeak. Oh no Harry had made it awkward by staring like a creep. Oh no.

Louis looked more frenzied by the second, eyes darting all over Harry’s face before panic set in his features. He turned around quickly, intent to run back into the bathroom and Harry saw it happen in slow motion. Louis happened to step into one of the water puddles his feet had left, losing balance and slipped. He used his arms to shield his face but Harry closed his eyes quickly, but the loud thud and the subsequent groan told him it surely was a bad fall.

“Fuck,” Louis groaned and Harry squinted one eye open to take in the scene. Louis was lying on his front and groaning so without thinking, Harry rushed forward despite knowing it was a bad idea. He also began very aware that he was in boxers and his shirt, with the shirt not doing much to cover his semi. Oh gosh.

“Louis,” Harry said on an exhale, watching Louis further bury his head into his arms. Harry kept his eyes strictly on his head and it took extreme self-control to not gape at his wonderful ass. “Are you alright?”

“No.”

“Let me help you up jus –”

“No,” Louis insisted loudly, making Harry stop halt as he tried to reach for him. Harry knew he was fussing over him but the angle of his arms and legs certainly looked awkward and Louis wasn’t ready to move. He knew it was Louis’ ego speaking, knew he was embarrassed about the fall but he also knew this was not the time to dwell on it. Louis was a stubborn ass, and no he wouldn’t think about asses. “I’m fine. Just throw me a towel and leave. Come back ten minutes later, after I’m asleep.”

“But I can –”

“Don’t make me more embarrassed than I am,” Louis murmured quiet as he let out a sigh. Harry let out a sigh as well, knowing it was no arguing with him. Plus if he had fallen down ass up he wouldn’t have wanted Louis to lift him anyway. But the man needed to let of his ego sometimes. He dragged his feet away from the naked man, taking an eyeful of the sight that would surely be his new wanking material. He listened to Louis instead as he grabbed a towel off the closet and threw it on Louis’ back. The older man was still not moving and Harry shook his head in frustration before he let himself out. He walked a few steps away before stopping and rubbing his eyes. He was never getting over this and this incident would certainly affect their future friendship.

Harry was feeling great. Nothing was awkward.

***

He had lied. But to say it was awkward would be an understatement.

Only half hour had passed since the, well, ‘naked incident’ and they were lying in bed beside each other with tensed silence lingering in the air. Neither of them was asleep and they both knew that. Neither of them was willing to speak either so they kept enough distance between them and revelled in the awkward silence. Louis was probably chagrined by the incident, Harry could tell yet he didn’t know why he should be. He was a gorgeous man and went to gym every day and it showed. Harry almost wanted to lick his abs before putting his mouth on Louis... which was the train of thought he didn’t want to trudge into again. It was bad enough that he had seen his glorious curves, he now also knew what Louis looked like lying on his stomach with his butt in the air. Revisiting that moment made something stir in Harry’s stomach and he immediately stopped thinking about and thought about unattractive things instead.

He was in the desperate need of a cold shower before he could even think about sleeping within a few inches of Louis. But going to the bathroom before Louis was asleep would alert the man to the fact that he was wanking to the thought of him since Harry wasn’t exactly quiet. So he would have to wait and keep pretending that the tension didn’t exist. It would be hard, in both ways.

“Okay this is ridiculous,” Louis grunted, throwing his hands in the air and startling Harry. He was thankful for the breach of silence, turning his head to the side and finding Louis’ frantic blue eyes staring back. They were a beautiful shade, as dark as a night sky but holding many more sparkling stars. He needed to stop thinking. “We are two grown, gay men who have seen each other’s penises. We are perfectly capable of not making it weird between us, right? We were born naked after all and that's alright. Right?”

“Right,” Harry repeated, eyes flitting down to Louis’ lips without meaning to. They were parted slightly and Harry wanted them pressed to his own. Desperately. They were close enough to kiss if one of them leaned forward and one look at Louis’ eyes told him both of them wanted it. But it would become complicated again, with Louis pulling away into his shell and distancing them more than before. He hated when Louis talked in clipped sentences and it made him feel unimportant somehow. So he cleared his throat, willing his eyes to not flit down. “You have a lot of tattoos. I knew you had a few on your arms but.”

Harry didn’t add more to it and Louis hummed as if he understood as he looked intently at the ceiling. Harry was left staring at his side profile, feeling more drawn to his sharp features that had gone soft due to a smile. “Yeah I had a phase back then when I wanted to get these small tattoos as a reminder of small, then important things. I realised how stupid they looked later on but I would never regret them. They’re a reminder of my past life you know, of a better time. I was nineteen and lonely in New York with a little extra money to spend on myself. That's the only time I went ‘wild’, when I went to a few clubs for a month and got smashed before I slowed down again. Later on I got a few meaningful one.”

“Yeah?” Harry prodded, smiling as he turned onto his side and placed his arms under his head. It was rare whenever Louis decided to talk about himself, about his past and this was the second time in a few hours that he had. Harry felt blessed listening to it, loving that he got a lot more to know about this mysterious, fascinating man. “Which are the meaningful ones?”

“You want to know huh,” he teased with a soft voice before he lifted his arm. He traced the compass on his forearm, specifically the home writing in place of north. “I got this when I was twenty and homesick. I mean I had no home then, since Lottie lived elsewhere and my childhood house was sold for money. I got it to remind myself that I’ll always be led to home somehow. It had a much deeper thought that got lost somewhere along the way.” He chuckled to himself, shaking his head as he lowered his arm again. His eyes looked a little shiny when he met Harry’s, a sad smile on his lips. “And the chest tattoo you saw earlier? Got it right after my breakup. The meaning is obvious, isn’t it? ‘It is what it is’. I was feeling really bitter then.”

“He didn’t deserve you,” Harry said quietly, surprising himself when he said it at all. Louis’ eyes took a strange expression, something that resembled curiosity but also more. It gave him the confidence to elaborate on it without breaking eye contact. “What he did to you was shitty, trying to shift his blame on you. You’ve worked so hard to be where you are and no one gets to make you regret it. You’re the best at what you do, put your all into it. And sure it’s made you a little conceited and rude but that’s not underserved. Anyone would be lucky to have you. And now I’ll stop talking.”

Louis’ cheeks took on the lightest shade of pink as he looked away. He made a tiny sound of disagreement, looking ready to fight Harry on it but ultimately didn’t, shrugging half heartedly to appease Harry. “I guess. Let’s not talk about him it’s useless. But since neither of us can sleep right now, I have an idea. I know it’s your dream to get to know me and since I’m being honest anyway, we should reveal five things about ourselves that the other doesn’t know. There will be no further questions asked on that and it wouldn’t be spoken about again. I won’t be meeting your eyes because I know you’ll be surprised. I’ll go first.”

Harry let out an overly surprised gasp as he sat up and fluffed his pillows before lying down again. Pulling his sheets up to his neck, he widened his eyes and nodded. “Okay now I’m ready.”

The corner of his lips turned up in a smile, his eyelashes brushing against his cheekbones as he closed his eyes. “Here goes. I’ve only ever been to one concert in my life and that was a Green Day one. I was the lovable class clown in school, the only time everyone around me loved me. Surprising, I know. The first tattoo I got was of a stick figure on a skateboard because I thought it represented me. Follow up fact, I can skateboard. And um, I don’t know why I’m revealing because it’s embarrassing but I haven’t had sex in two years.”

“Wow two years?” Harry exclaimed rather loudly, making Louis clamp his hand on his mouth. Harry’s eyes immediately widened as he sunk into the bed, body going plaint. Louis gasped softly as he drew his hand away and neither of them mentioned Harry’s slightly dilated pupils. So Harry had a submissive kink which he never knew he had before. Interesting. He coughed. It was a great thing they were talking about sex too, since Harry hadn’t had that in one and a half year. He didn’t have the rights to tease Louis, really. “That’s riveting.”

“I revealed to you that I used to be a fun person but the fact that I haven’t had sex in a long time is riveting to you.” He looked incredulous and it made Harry giggle. “You’re strange.”

“And you turned into a completely different person now,” Harry countered, bottom lip jutting out. Trying to imagine a young, fun Louis seemed difficult since this Louis stayed far away from anything remotely enjoyable. Ten years ago, he seemed to be a happy person with no idea what was about to befall him. It made him sad, that circumstances had made the man change so much that he was unidentifiable. It made the saviour instinct in Harry rise, making him want to free Louis from the walls he had trapped himself inside. He knew it would be hard to achieve since he had been trying the same for three years now and he’d have to redouble his efforts. This trip had made him understand his boss a lot better and brought them a lot closer than before. Both emotionally and physically, since they were leaning towards each other right now. And it didn’t feel strange at all, surprisingly.

Louis gave him a tight smile, attempting a shrug. “It is what it is, Styles. And you’re next.”

“Okay.” Harry kept staring at Louis. Unlike Louis, Harry loved eye contact. It made him more focused on what he spoke and knew exactly what the other person thought of it. It helped him realise just how much the person cared and right now, it seemed like Louis cared a lot since he had shifted to face him completely. “Compared to you my life will seem boring. So first um, I’ve always hated attention, especially undeserved and malicious. That's not exactly an unknown fact but I haven’t told you about it so I could count it as one. And um I once spent my entire summer following Fleetwood Mac on tour and attended seven consecutive concerts before my body gave up and I never pulled that move again. My first tattoo was this star on my arm that I got when I turned eighteen. Oh I almost got engaged to this guy I was dating for six months. But I knew he was proposing only to stop me from moving to New York so I refused and broke up and luckily, haven’t seen him since. Also, it’s been um, a year and a half for me? I guess.”

“You guess?” Louis asked incredulously before his eyebrows lifted and hid behind his fringe. Mischief was lighting up his features, lips twitching into a smirk and Harry blushed. “One and a half year? And then you were teasing me for not having sex for two years. Shame on you, Styles, shame on you. You’re a bloody hypocrite.”

“Am not!” Harry protested despite knowing he was being one. He didn’t look away, aware that he was smiling despite not wanting to. It was the effect of Louis’ grin. It was contagious.

“Sure, darling,” Louis teased, in his natural English accent as he shifted a little. The pet name rolled off his tongue so smoothly that Harry’s stomach swooped in reaction, making him lose the rest of his half-hearted objections. “And that was barely anything, Harold. Your life is so damn posh.”

“Your accent is posh,” Harry muttered lamely and Louis chuckled. There was a strand of hair curling the other way on Louis’ forehead and without thinking much of it, Harry reached to push it the right way. His hand lingered on Louis’ cheeks, trailing down slowly and he thought he heard Louis’ breath hitch. If that had happened, Louis was quick to gather himself.

“As entertaining as tonight has been,” he started, eyes flashing with a strange expression. “I think I’m going to call it a night. Even if the sky outside won’t call it that, my eyes are already drooping again. It has been great getting to know you, Harold, although it tells me you’ve always been bloody boring.”

“And your words tell me you have turned boring,” Harry said, watching Louis’ smile dim slightly. “Don’t worry, Lou, I know there’s a lot more to know about you and I’m going to wheedle it out of you. By the end of our fake marriage, I will actually know everything there is to know about you.”

Louis chuckled, looking fond before turning on to his back. “I doubt it, love. But we have time, yeah. Thanks for today, never had such fun before.” He closed his eyes and left out a sharp exhale followed by bitter laughter. “I wish it wasn’t under a lie of loving each other but we’re good at it, right? I don’t understand how everyone naturally believes us. But goodnight. Don’t you dare cuddle me again.”

“Again?” Harry asked, not knowing he had done that this morning. Louis’ lips pressing together confirmed he had and Harry felt slightly embarrassed by that. But he felt a little sad knowing he didn’t actually know what it would be like to wake up in Louis’ arms. He probably never would. Unwillingly, he shifted away from Louis and flipped onto the other side so he was left staring at the electric fireplace. “Won’t do that.”

Surely he hadn’t imagined the bitterness to Louis’ words when he talked about the pretence of loving part. For some reason, they got to Harry and affected him. He knew that this closeness was a show and that they would never be anything more, but the realisation hurt and bothered more than he let it show. After tomorrow they would get back to work and revert to expressionless nods and curt exchanges. There would be brisk conversations, avoiding gossips and attending phone calls while knowing he was going nowhere. There would be small hints of affection, enough to appease their colleagues and fall under the ‘no PDA at work’ excuse. They would revert back to a time when they hadn’t kissed, when Harry hadn’t realised he loved Louis, where he didn’t know Louis’ past. He didn’t know how he could forget all this and go back to their distant selves. He dreaded that and the dread sat heavy atop his chest, snuffling all chances of sleep. The future was going to hurt, his heart was going to get broken for no reason and there was no way to avoid it.

Maybe trying to help Louis out this time would backfire and the scar it would leave would never heal. Harry closed his eyes and listened to Louis’ breaths before they evened out as he fell asleep.

***

If Harry had thought he had the most awkward moment of his life last night then he was wrong. It was more embarrassing and a lot more awkward when Harry woke up. He felt happy and comfortable when he woke up, safe and nestled in warmth. It went downhill from the moment he opened his eyes. There were three main things.

First of all, Harry was curled up into Louis’ side, nose pressed into the dip of Louis’ collarbone and arm thrown around his tiny waist. It was comfortable and not at all strange that Louis’ prediction had come true. It wasn’t even awkward since Louis was cuddling him right back, having moved into Harry’s space so that they were together in the middle of the bed.

Secondly, he had a morning boner. Or it might not be a morning thing, more so of the fact that he had dreams involving Louis and was currently wound tight around the object of his affection. Or his crush, to simply say. But luckily, his hips were angled away from Louis’ thigh so he was pressed up against him down there. It would have been his biggest problem, if not for the even bigger problem at hand.

See the biggest reason why everything was ten times embarrassing was because he hadn’t woken up naturally. There was an incessant poking on his arm and was met with Gemma’s delighted smirk when he finally opened his eyes. He was confused for a few seconds as he tightened his hold around Louis subconsciously. And then he realised why that was the wrong action as he let out a squeak and tried to pull away. To his surprise, Louis’ arms tightened around him and he mumbled. Harry would be lying if he said if he didn’t feel warm inside, if he said he didn’t feel the least bit happy that Louis was pulling him. It made him think he had somewhat of a chance with Louis since he wasn’t pushed away for the first time. That is if their future wasn’t already doomed due to Gemma. Harry wanted to sink into this happy feeling and never let go, breathe in the scent of this man. He felt content and at ease and hoped Louis felt the same when he woke up. But his hopeful butterflies were shot down by his sister, who had taken to slap his arm.

“Get up get up, you lazy... baby,” she sung, her face bright for what Harry supposed was early morning. She looked like a cat that had got the cream and was brandishing it front of his face. She was never going to let him live it down for sure, even if Harry did end up with Louis. “One shouldn’t sleep so much.”

Gemma punctuated her sentence with picking up the remote and opening the blinds. The room was basked in sudden brightness, making Harry let out a low whine. He buried his face into Louis’ hair as he adjusted to the light, before glaring at his sister. He was about to tell her off with some choice words when he was beaten to it.

“Gemma, maybe we should have let them be,” said a female voice in a frantic whisper and Harry groaned as he proceeded to bury his nose back into Louis’ neck. His stomach swooped when Louis hummed, his eyelashes fluttering against Harry’s forehead. He breathed him in, knowing this morning would surely make Louis run for the hills in frustration and panic, even if it was his idea in the first place. His family was intrusive without meaning to be but never had he minded it so much. Harry was annoyed that they wouldn’t let him enjoy one warm moment with his pretend fiancé.

The light flooding the room seemed to rouse Louis as well, who shifted and mumbled incoherently. He couldn’t help but smile at the sniffling sounds, pulling away again and let go easily by Louis this time. He kept staring at the other man, watching his eyelashes flutter more and his lips form a pout. There were pillow creases on his cheek, hair looking like a pigeon’s nest and Harry’s whipped ass would still say he was the prettiest thing in sight. Harry was watching him in (figuratively and literally) a whole new light, feeling endeared by this sleepy soft man. He almost forgot his family was around until Gemma’s quiet chuckles broke through his thoughts, making his face heat up.

Her laughs made Louis finally open his eyes, frowning further as he blinked sleepily. Harry wanted to kiss those lips and taste his morning breath, which was a weird thing to need. Louis easily masked his confusion, eyes shifting away to look at the others. It was only then that Harry noticed his grandmother was in his room as well. All of them were here. Great. “Oh hello ladies. Good morning.”

“Seems like you had a great morning, Louis,” Gemma teased and winked at them while Harry made a grumbling sound. Louis flashed a smile at Gemma so as to not seem odd before his eyes slid over to Harry. He had never seen Louis this early in the morning, right after he had woken up for obvious reasons. He had never seen how light blue his eyes got. There were various emotions flitting through them and Harry could spy surprise and guilt. He smiled, warning with his eyes before leaning forward to place a close-mouthed kiss on his lips. Gemma let out a surprised squawk of laughter at Harry’s expression and he tried his best to compose himself. “And now Harry had a good morning. So fun. Sorry to wake you up boys... actually I’m not but you were looking quite cosy.”

“I hate you, Gemma,” Harry grumbled and she laughed in reply. “Good morning mom, Gammy. Why are the three of you in my room this early?”

Gemma placed a hand over his chest. “Personally, I saw them head in and took it as an opportunity to annoy you. I won’t lie.”

“Hence, I hate you,” Harry said a little loudly, stretching his arms before subtle wiggling his arm around Louis’ shoulder. The latter chuckled, before leaning in and resting his head on Harry’s shoulder. Harry saw Gemma give them a weird look but didn’t say anything, thankfully.

“Well I wanted to bring you breakfast and found Gammy along the way,” Anne said and she was still holding a tray of cinnamon rolls and a teapot. Harry’s stomach grumbled at the sight and smell, making her laugh. She placed it on the bedside table. “Eat it before it gets cold. And Louis dear, I’ve made tea for you since Gemma said you liked it.”

“Thank you, Anne,” Louis rasped and smiled. Harry couldn’t take his eyes off him even when he knew he was being ridiculous. But he could always brush it off with an excuse of acting like a loving fiancé. “I would love a cuppa. The food smells lovely.”

“It’s no problem, dear,” Gammy said as she waved away his gratitude with a wide smile. Harry immediately grew suspicious due to the glint in her eyes and the fact that they were here so early. The bedside clock said it was only nine. They were just stood there, as if expecting something from him while wanting to speak at the same time. Harry shifted and Louis got the hint, both of them sitting up and leaning against the headboard. Gammy nodded with satisfaction, eyebrows rising. “We actually came in here to talk to you about something.”

“We did?” Gemma asked, shooting Harry a look of pure confusion. Harry frowned further, knowing that if Gemma was kept out of it yet they were to announce something to him, it wouldn’t be good. His sister had promised to help him out and her panic was getting to him as well. It explained Gammy’s cheerful nods, her curled fingers and her smirk. Neither of them was a good sign, especially together. He glanced again at Gemma and she mirrored his sentiment, brows furrowed with determination. She was with him on this then, which was good. She was good with words and might talk their way out of whatever this was. Louis looked calm, mainly because he didn’t know Harry’s grandmother yet. “What about, Gammy? I thought we were just coming in here to tease them.”

“That we were,” Gammy said, chuckling gleefully. She looked at Anne and both of them smiled mysteriously and a little too cheerily. Louis seemed to have caught on as his lips twisted down. “I heard the two of you were playing soccer with Niall, which is wonderful. You’re happy, aren’t you?”

“Yes?” Harry replied, vaguely feeling like he was heading into a trap.

Anne smiled wider. “That’s good. Because I was just wondering about that. You’re so happy, Harry, more than I have seen you in years. You always looked morose living here, complaining about small towns. When you moved to New York I was worried, especially when Gemma told me you had a horrid boss who made you work extra. Now I know that she was in on your secrets but wasn’t willing to tell me hence it all made sense.”

“It did?” Gemma asked, frowning.

“Yes, dear,” Gammy continued, nodding. “The few times he came over, he never let anyone badmouth his boss, was praising him with that look in his eyes. I suspected, of course but I couldn’t prod. Now that we know they’re engaged I thought it was about time.”

“About time,” Louis whispered, biting his lower lip. Harry glanced at him, confused by his grandmother’s words and worried about Louis’ reaction. His face was annoyingly impassive, his real feelings hidden even from Harry and he worried. “I guess it was.”

“That’s why you should have your wedding here today!” Anne exclaimed before giggling. Gammy was nodding furiously beside her, and Harry’s stomach sank. He looked over at Gemma with a panicked expression, finding her frozen in surprise. His lips were parted, eyes bugging out and that's when he knew he had lost his sister. Louis was in a similar state of panic, eyes clouded over by a strange expression. He composed himself quickly even if his fingers were drumming against the sheet. “Robin flew in this morning and agreed with my idea. Isn’t that a great idea?”

“No,” Harry almost yelled, making the older ladies frown and Louis broke out of his daze. “I uh I mean...”

“We haven’t had anything planned,” Louis cut in swiftly, and Harry sighed in relief, nodding along. “Weddings take a lot of preparations and we have nothing done yet.”

“Haven’t written our vows,” Harry added, collecting himself.

“I don’t have anyone to be my best man.”

“His sister is not here.”

“We don’t have a tuxedo.”

“And there’s no venue,” Gemma added, finally having snapped out of her daze. She laughed nervously and Gammy narrowed her eyes. “We have one hall for a wedding and I think it isn’t available right now. Oh no we can’t do it today.”

“Nonsense,” Gammy exclaimed, shaking her head while the three of them flinched. “All of these are excuses. I don’t see a valid reason.”

“It’s your birthday weekend, Gammy,” Louis said sweetly and Harry almost giggled as he batted his eyelashes. He was trying to be phony charming and Gammy laughed. “We can’t steal your birthday thunder. It’s your ninetieth too, a big deal right. At least that's what Harold here said when he dragged me here.”

“Yes, Gammy, an important day. Valid reason.” Harry widened his eyes to look charming and it almost worked on her grandmother. His mother ruined it all when she laughed loudly, shaking her head.

“If you’re worrying about the wedding venue hassle, you don’t have to,” she said brightly. She tucked her hair behind her ear, hands moving with excitement. Harry smiled at it, endeared by his mom’s silly excitement. “You could get married in the barn. It’s a Selley family tradition, you know that. And even though neither of you are Selley, Harry you’re a descendent of one. And why break tradition right?”

“But how will we set up the venue and invites in a few hours,” Harry said weakly, his resolve already breaking. His mother was going to marry him off today itself. God knows she’s been waiting for someone to come along since ages. “It will take a day at least, right? And we can’t stay.”

“Harry,” she reprimanded, making him deflate. He sneaked a glance at Louis who looked deathly calm but calculating, expression closed off. He looked back at his mom who was smiling. “It’s fine. You know I plan a lot of weddings and can do this within four hours. It won’t be much but it’ll be wonderful, alright.”

“We don’t have our rings,” Harry protested for one last time, knowing he was fighting a losing battle.

Louis pursed his lips before he softly said, “I have one. I brought your ring with me, Harry.”

“Oh,” Harry said on a soft exhale, knowing Gemma was observing them. Anne and Gammy were oblivious as to why it was so crucial, giggling happily.

“And I always wanted you to give your husband your grandfather’s ring.” Gammy clapped her hands together in joy. “This will be my best birthday. I never thought I’d see you marry someone. This will be the best gift I get.”

“I already bought you a gift,” Harry grumbled unhappily. His stomach grumbled unhappily as well, making the older ladies laugh.

“We’ll leave you alone now,” Gammy said with an exaggerated wink and placed her hand on her daughter’s shoulder. “Come on Anne, we’ll let them be. We have a wedding to plan. And oh before I forget, Gemma you take Harry tux shopping while I’ll ask Niall to accompany Louis. Or the other way around, if you want. You kids decide. We adults will do the rest of the thing.”

“I’m so happy,” Anne exclaimed and let herself be led out by Gammy. They had forgotten about Gemma being there it seemed as they closed the door behind them. Silence prevailed for a good two minutes.

“Okay did that just happen?” Gemma exhaled, the first one to break the silence. She nudged Harry before plopping down beside him. She looked bewildered, blinking twice as much as if to get her bearings on the situation. “What the fuck was that? Why did you agree to a tradition marriage ceremony when this arrangement is anything but? Have you discussed the particulars? What are the devilish duo planning? Actually, what the fuck?”

“I don’t know,” Harry said, sighing as he chewed his lower lip. He was still staring at the door and slowly moved his gaze to stare at Louis, who had gone oddly quiet in the whole exchange. He looked pale as a sheet, lips pursed and eyes shifty. His fingers were tapping that distracting tune and in the past two days Harry had reached out to quieten them but right now, he couldn’t make himself do the same. It was awkward again, the peace and comfort that they had established was broken. Of course Louis didn’t want a traditional wedding, maybe he wasn’t that kind of a guy. He reached out to touch the other man’s shoulder but stopped, feeling hesitant. “Louis, are you alright?”

“I am,” he replied in a pitch higher than his usual one. He looked back at him, lips now turned into a fake, manic smile as he nodded. Harry frowned since this was the furthest from ‘alright’. “Why wouldn’t I be?”

“Because you have to walk down the aisle now?” Gemma deadpanned, her concern seeping into her words as she frowned. “Or is the other way round?”

“We all know it is Harold’s dream to walk down the aisle,” Louis interjected, letting out a harsh, false laughter which worried Harry further. His shoulders were tense and eyes hazy as he looked anywhere but directly at them. His fingers were fiddling with the hem of his shirt and he looked close to snapping and bolting, as he often did close to deadlines. Except it was worse right now since Louis would never run away from work related situations and Harry’s knowledge was limited in his personal situations. Harry would be immensely hurt if Louis did run, since it would essentially be a rejection and damage their relationship forever. But he was also worried how exactly Louis would make his way across the sea if he was to get to the airport. If Gemma would have been listening in to his thoughts, she would have swatted him for putting concerns for Louis over himself. But he couldn’t turn off the concern and watched the other man intently. Louis had taken to run his fingers through his hair before he widened his eyes. “Actually, I have something to show you first.”

Louis almost leapt off the bed hurriedly but gracefully before walking over to where their luggage was kept. He opened his bag and began rummaging through his clothes as he muttered under his breath something that didn’t carry over to them. The Styles siblings watched Louis with barely held apprehension, equally worried he was losing it due to the news dropped on their heads.

“Louis what are you...”

“I found it!” he exclaimed before Harry could finish the sentence. Harry could see a small box in his hands and stared at it until Louis held it towards him to take. His jaw dropped at the sight of it, heart pounding in his chest expectantly as Louis drew closer until he all but shoved the box in Harry’s face. He didn’t let himself hope until the box was in his hand and he opened. He could only gape at the ring nestled inside while Gemma gasped loudly beside him. “Like I said earlier, I had already picked out a ring. I was going to give it to you on Friday before we left for here but then I forgot. Had it specially made for your finger on Wednesday when you still hadn’t back out of the proposal so...”

Harry did not hear the rest of his rambling, couldn’t hear anything really except for the roar in his ears as he kept staring at the ring, open mouthed. He gently picked it out, turning it over in his fingers with quiet wonder. It wasn’t a traditional silver ring but was rather rose gold, with five small diamonds engraved into it. It wasn’t flashy but it wasn’t subtle either, perfectly suited for Harry’s taste so he stared at Louis in surprise. His face had taken a pinkish tint as he continued speaking, hand movements getting more erratic as if he couldn’t stop.

“... So I thought you might like this one and bought it,” he concluded, nodding in finality. Harry blinked at him owlishly, making Louis look like he wanted to swallow back his words. “I decided to splurge since who else do I have to spend on, right? It’s not much, but do you like it?”

“It’s beautiful,” Harry gushed in a quiet whisper, eyes turning a little misty as he smiled. Louis smiled as well still as unnerved as before but he nodded, taking a step back. “Thank you.”

“It’s no problem but I’m just going to...” he trailed off, pointing towards the bathroom door and taking hurried steps before disappearing behind it. Harry kept gaped at the door now, taken aback by the surprising turn of events. Louis had actually bought a ring, suited to his taste and was nervous about it. Was this a dream?

“He’s still so confusing,” Gemma murmured with something like awe in her voice as she shook her head. She snatched the ring from Harry’s fingers, examining it with a small smile. “But it’s so cute how much he likes you back. I had never thought that would be the case before, I was just joking. But in the past two days I’ve never been surer.”

“That’s not true,” Harry whispered, barely believing his own words.

“He bought you a ring for god’s sakes,” she burst out, still quiet enough that Louis wouldn’t be able to hear it. She was smiling excitedly and Harry stared back blankly, starting to believe her. “And not just a generic one, he was searching according to your taste, didn’t you hear? A rose gold one, which means he definitely knows you’re into pink... which I’m sure everyone does. But my point is, I’m right. You two are meant to be!”

Harry hummed absently as a response while he fiddled with the sheets and considered her words. Gemma might be right sometimes and Louis was always confusing. Louis was unpredictable more like, he always knew that but this thing was the weirdest he had been. Before this week he had never given many hints that pointed towards him liking Harry as a person. He was always standoffish and off-putting, keeping a distance between them which was both physical and emotional. But buying the ring, kissing him back earnestly... it did point towards the least bit of attraction in a very Louis way. If keeping distance was Louis’ way of showing attraction, it wouldn’t be far fetched really. But did Louis really like him back? But more importantly, what were Harry’s real thoughts about the whole thing. He needed a handle on things and needed more time to think. Of course he needed more time, something he didn’t have.

“Harry, I need you over here,” his mom called out from downstairs and Gemma groaned.

“Coming!” Harry yelled before he sighed. He sunk back into the pillows and groaned and was hit on the back with a bathrobe. He didn’t bother glaring at Gemma, since she was only looking out for him, just sat up again and pulled the robe around him. His sister was already by the door, looking impatient and Harry sighed once again before following her out the door. The upper floor was quiet since there was no one except for them. But the lower floor was a whole other deal. It might have been ten minutes since his mother and grandmother might have started the preparation for Harry’s wedding but their house was already crowded. There were many neighbours rushing past him in a flurry of movements, occasionally someone stopping to congratulate him before going back to what they were doing. Harry watched them in confusion, feeling overwhelmed by just how much they were already doing and he momentarily couldn’t breathe. He was befuddled by the situation he was in, since he hadn’t even decided if he was fine with everything. Since there was supposed to be Gammy’s birthday party today, there would be a few relatives arriving from far and they would be present at the wedding instead. It would surely be a grand event, despite what his mom had said. Harry didn’t know how to feel, getting anxious by the minute and he was thankful for Gemma, who gripped on to his hand. It was slightly grounding, even if his brain had practically gone numb with how much he was feeling. It happened often.

“Mom is quick,” she whispered, watching everything with raised eyebrows and chuckled. “I think she will marry you off today itself. I didn’t think she could put it together that fast.”

Harry laughed nervously, agreeing with her. “Actually Gemma, can you go find mom? She’s nowhere to be found.”

“On it,” she said, squeezing his hand before letting go. “And Haz, you’ll be fine. Just breathe.”

Harry nodded and gulped, suddenly left alone with just his thoughts and fears for company, blinking through the haze in his head. Of course he wasn’t physically alone, but the people around him weren’t helping either. In the midst of it all, he found Robin heading towards him, a determined look in his eyes. He smiled when he spotted Harry, picking his pace.

“Hey Harry,” he greeted before enveloping him in a hug. It felt nice since that was what Harry was craving for so he smiled, content at being almost suffocated by his stepfather.

“Hey Robin,” Harry said as he chuckled. “So long, yeah?”

“Indeed it is,” he replied as he laughed jovially, stepping back. “I’ve heard a lot about you from your mother since I’ve been back. And I’ve been meaning to talk to you.”

“Is it about Louis?” Harry asked, sinking his teeth in his bottom lip. He found his confirmation in the furrow that formed on Robin’s forehead, dread filling up in his chest. Of course his stepfather didn’t approve that he was dating his superior without telling anyone. And was now getting married to him so quickly. Probably the most rational member of his family, his stepfather was.

He looked around, frowning further when he saw people bustling around. “Not here, though, come with me.”

“Okay,” Harry squeaked, meekly following his stepfather into another, quiet room. He felt vaguely like a child about to be schooled even though Robin had never once yelled at him or anything. But worry was gnawing at him as he stood in front of his stepfather with his head ducked. “Are you angry at me?”

Robin guffawed, making Harry look at him in surprise. He looked surprised at his conclusion, shaking his head. “Not at all, Harry. It’s your personal business. Who would I be to be angry at that? Also Anne tells me you look happy around him, so I would be the last person to stop you from being happy.” He looked grim again, the determination back in his eyes. “I wanted to ask you if you’re sure about this.”

“About what?”

“Marriage,” Robin explained. Harry frowned, still not understanding it. “Anne told me she wanted the two of you to marry here in the barn where we did. I did not want to disappoint her so I agreed that it was a good idea but I wanted to ask you. Are you sure you want to get married so soon? Does Louis? I know when your mother and your grandmother put their minds to something they’re hard to deter. But say the word and I’ll be on your side.”

Harry blinked for a few seconds before bursting into laughter, shaking his head. Here he had been expecting a rebuke yet here he was being defended. It was sweet, temporarily making him feel elated. “Thank you, Robin but it’s alright. I mean we weren’t planning the wedding so early, but I don’t mind much? It isn’t about when and where I get married, it’s just Louis who matters. I love him, you know, and I am excited to get married too.”

“Glad to hear that,” Robin said with a wide smile, wrapping him in another warm hug. Harry realised he meant everything he had said. He had almost admitted out loud that he loved Louis after his ‘big realisation’, which was a big thing for him. Yet he was fine, almost relieved that he wasn’t the only person to carry the secret. He felt laughter bubbling in his chest, anxiety having gone as Robin let go. “If that's the case then I better go help your mom. She must have kicked up a right fuss.”

“Actually, I’ll come with you. She was looking for me before.”

***

The few minutes that Louis spent in the bathroom just might be few of the most excruciating moments of his life.

He had alternated between screaming softly into his fist and rubbing his eyes repeatedly. He also splashed water on his face, repenting the past few minutes of his life that he had made an absolute tit out of himself as he babbled in front of Harry about the ring. He could have just given him it but no, he had to explain his thought process behind buying that certain ring. He was feeling flustered being under Harry’s intent gaze and lost his cool when he had complimented the ring, the weird shine in his eyes that certainly Louis didn’t deserve. He was about to confess his love then and there, since he had confessed everything else anyway. Hence he excused himself and locked himself in the bathroom instead, ending the awkward conversation then and there. And honestly, what was wrong with him?

Louis was listening to the noises outside, waiting for the Styles siblings to leave and let out a sigh before stepping outside. He was thankful that the room was empty and threw himself on the bed with a groan. He couldn’t believe he had encouraged Harry’s cuddling while asleep and leaned into him a few hours back, when he had first woken up. The sheet still smelled like Harry so he breathed it in before chiding himself. He was clearly being a creep, he thought as he sat upright. The ring box was placed on the bedside table and he frowned at it. He had actually bought another ring. His original plan was to show him both then let him decide. But there wasn’t time for it now so he would have to give the other ring to Harry later, which was basically just a silver band with red gems and gold roses engraved on it. He ran his fingers through his hair in frustration, almost pulling on them.

Louis’ first instinct was to escape the situation as soon as he could and put some distance between them. He didn’t want to actually go through with the marriage. It wasn’t as if he didn’t want to marry Harry in the midst of flowers and music. It was that he wanted it too much and didn’t want to marry on a bed of lies. He wanted his sister by his side as his best man since there was no one else he’d want. Louis also wanted to proudly say ‘I do’ and recite his heartfelt vows and seal it with a kiss. He didn’t want it to go like this. But also, Louis couldn’t run away right now and leave Harry to face this, since it was his fault they were in the situation at all. So he decided a walk should do for now. Louis fished out a pair of fresh new sweatpants from his bag and pulled on a hoodie. He fixed his hair into something presentable and shoved his work phone in his pocket before sneaking out of the bedroom and down the stairs.

And boy was he not ready for downstairs.

Louis was taken aback by the sheer number of people currently milling about in the living room, more than they were the day before. They were busy though so he could sneak out easily to the porch and then out without being stopped. Once he was sufficiently away from the house, Louis took off in a sprint and into the woods. The crunch of the gravel underneath his feet and the silence enveloping him was a strange feeling, too used to the noises of New York City. He could get used to this surely, he thought and the fresh air was helping him a little. He slowed into a jog ten minutes later, not yet winded but far away from the house.

Louis kept walking deeper into the green woods that reminded him too much of Harry’s eyes. It wasn’t as dramatic as he had hoped it would be, since the trees didn’t get any thicker. He was keeping to the trail but it achieved his purpose of putting some distance between him and the situation. He was tapping his fingers against his thigh, in desperate need of a cigarette but also knew that if Harry smelled his breath, he’d know he had been smoking and will be disappointed. And he never wanted to let Harry down if he could. Not on purpose. So he leaned against a random tree and closed his eyes.

Louis’ thoughts were a jumbled mess in his head, one side saying he should go forward with the wedding and slowly try to woo Harry somehow. The other said he shouldn’t start something on a false base since he would be sure to crash under. Times like this he really hated having no friends, no one to give him sound advice. He was far away from people that he couldn’t be heard, seen or questioned. Literally this time. He was essentially tired of everything, now that he had managed to stay away from his work for a few days. There was only one person he wasn’t tired of yet, but it was also the one person he was trying to run away from. So it was not a day to be Louis Tomlinson for sure. He fiddled with his phone before giving in with a sigh and calling the only other person he actually knew.

“Hey Lou,” Lottie greeted as she picked on the second ring. She sounded cheery, oblivious to Louis’ situation and he had wanted to keep it that way but. Desperate times. “I thought it would take another week for you to find some time for me.”

“That’s funny,” he deadpanned, a smile sneaking on to his face in spite of everything. “And I call you every Sunday without fail so that isn’t even true. I always like to keep up with my favourite sister.”

“You mean your only sister,” Lottie corrected and Louis laughed. “It’s earlier than usual for your call. So what's up? Want to meet for brunch?”

“I would love to,” he muttered as his eyes flit over the expanse of trees and sighed. He could feel his sister’s mood change on the other side, going from cheery to confused. He could feel the confusion being radiated in static. “But I’m not in New York right now. I’m in Alaska.”

“For a work event?” she asked slowly, obviously confused that she didn’t know.

“Not really,” he whispered before biting his lip. He framed the sentences in his head so as to make the situation seem less dire than it was. She might be the younger sibling but sure liked to mother him about anything. So he was not looking forward to her reaction, the same reason that he hadn’t told her about it in the first place. He took in a deep breath. “So it’s a long story that I’ll tell you tomorrow over lunch. I’m in a bit of a crisis that I can’t explain completely over the phone. It’s a series of things that have led me to this point. But basically, I’m in love with Harry and don’t know what to do about it.”

“Cue exaggerated surprise here,” she deadpanned and he rolled his eyes. He had thought he was able to hide his feelings about Harry but apparently not. Lottie did know him better than he thought she did, it seems. “I’ve known that for a while, you’re really not subtle. Every time you talk about him over brunch, which by the way is a lot many times and not so interesting things, your eyes sparkle. It’s like seeing the other Louis, the one which I seemed to have lost after you moved. And I know that this is not a problem for you since I think you’ve known you like him for a while. So what's the real problem that you have a crisis over? Don’t keep me waiting.”

Louis sighed, massaging his forehead with two fingers. “Okay, don’t ask how but we’re fake engaged right now and at his family home in Alaska. But his family doesn’t know that hence want us to get actually married with the whole ring exchanging, suits, guest inviting thing.” He paused to catch his breath and Lottie stayed mute over the line but her judgement and disdain was clear. “They want us to do the whole tradition thing, or as tradition as it could be for a gay couple. It’s a really sweet gesture and a scenic location but I don’t know what to do. Yes I dreamed of getting married to him some day but not under a lie. I don’t know where I stand with him right now and I’m nervous. I think he’s upset about the whole thing.”

“Of course he is upset!” she exclaimed, making him flinch. “Louis, you know I’ve always condemned the way you treat him at work but I’m furious with you right now. All these years you were the sensible one about everything. You managed to study and handle two jobs and make enough time for me. I always admired that, even though I felt that you didn’t make time for yourself. Then you got an assistant and stole all his time as well, just so you could keep Harry for yourself. I didn’t tell you anything. He’s always been a little too nice to you even though you’re a dick, don’t deny. I wanted to call him myself and tell him off for not tell you off. That was the biggest problem with you then. But what is the meaning of this, Louis? Why are you bullying poor Harry into marrying you for... I don’t know why but you better have a good explanation for this, mister. Explain it to me now!”

“I don’t have enough time, Lottie,” he whined and stomped his foot petulantly. She was right, of course she was right. Her words were mirroring the voice of reason in his head and he couldn’t fight her on it at all. “But I know you’re going to get angrier at me for it, okay. Also, I’m not bullying him into it, I gave him an out. Of sorts. But that's not the main problem. What should I do now?”

“How will I give you advice when you tell me half of the story,” she muttered, probably grimacing by her tone. Louis huffed, agreeing with her as he pushed off the tree and walked back down the trail. He knew he was absent for too long and Harry would be worried when he went back to the room. He was one of the grooms, after all and according to Anne, would have a suit fitting. “If you’re saying you don’t have enough time then I believe you. But I also can’t help you out here, Lou and you know that. You have to find the solution yourself like you always do. But I will tell you one thing, alright? Before you go through with this wedding thing, talk to him. Find him, tell him how you really feel about him and sort it out. I know it would be hard since you’re used to trapping your feelings but for once, let them out. Tell him everything. Before you figuratively walk down the aisle. Alright?”

Louis frowned at the ground, kicking some dirt in frustration. “I guess you’re right, Lots. I need to talk to him right now. How hard could it be, right?”

“Very hard,” she said, chuckling softly. “But I’m proud that you’re finally admitting your feelings to me, thought it would take forever. I also know how hard it must be, since after you know. So good luck. Don’t hurt Harry. And I believe he likes you back after everything you’ve done, for some reason.”

“He is a weird one,” Louis agreed and smiled. Lottie laughed in agreement. “Okay Lots, it was great talking to you but I have to go back. We’ll talk tomorrow, yeah?”

“You better call,” she warned. “Else I’m barging into your house and cornering you. Oh and I also want to meet Harry.”

“Goodbye,” Louis said, halting her before she could demand any further. She laughed as she replied the same and he cut the call. He was feeling lighter than before, not that he knew what to do next. But this was a start. The happy feeling lasted for a few seconds until he saw he had a few missed calls and new texts from an unknown number. He frowned, opening the messages.

**‘Where the hell are you right now, Louis? You’re certainly not in the room.’**

**‘Oh and this is Niall.’**

**‘Where are you and why is your phone engaged?’**

**‘Reply, you dick!’**

Louis made a weird sound in his throat that must have been a chuckle as he jogged the rest of the way out to the Styles-Twist mansion. He was out of the woods now and wasn’t that a fitting metaphor. The commotion was louder than before, making him slow his pace and stare. They were holding up chairs and tables and taking it... somewhere. Louis assumed it was to the barn and blanched slightly. He had to find Harry. But as he walked up to the porch, he found Niall instead, standing with his hands on his hips. The man frowned as he spotted Louis before jogging over the rest of the distance.

“Where were you?” he demanded as he slapped Louis’ arm. The latter frowned as he rubbed his arm, not having anticipated the man would hit that hard. Niall’s frown melted into a smile as he grabbed Louis’ other arm. “Anyway so now that you’re here, go get dressed. We have to go.”

“Go where?” he grumbled as Niall dragged him in the house, smiling effortlessly at the people they passed. Louis tripped over his feet, eyes searching for Harry. “And do you know where Harry is? I need to talk to him first.”

Niall cackled as if he had said something funny, throwing a sly wink over his back. “Oh lovers in love. Can’t say I’m familiar with that feeling but it’s cute. I know the two of you are inseparable but it’s bad luck to see the groom before the wedding. And all that shit.”

“You don’t understand Niall, it’s urgent,” Louis insisted, trying to free his hand but Niall just tightened his grip. Lottie’s words were coming back to him and he knew he had to follow through. He had to confess before they committed. But with Niall here, he was sure he wouldn’t be let go of any time soon. And telling Niall the thing would make him hate Louis, which he didn’t want as well. “I need to talk to him now.”

“You have your whole life to talk and kiss,” he teased before bursting into laughter, shaking his head. They had reached Harry’s bedroom when he finally let go of Louis’ wrist. He stood outside the door while nudging Louis in. “Now get dressed into something a little more formal. We’re going to town.”

Louis gulped as he looked out the window. “You mean on the boat?”

“How else?”

“Oh no,” Louis groaned, suddenly being faced with another major problem. He officially hated Alaska. But wait. “Actually I may have a negotiation.”

***


	7. Chapter 7

“I don’t like this one either,” Harry grumbled as he twirled once more in front of the floor length mirror. He gnawed on his bottom lip as he fixed his bow, hoping it was a non-traditional pussy bow instead, which he was used to. There was nothing wrong with his suit, really except it looked... less glamorous. It was a three-piece suit with a good fit, showing off his nonexistent curves and butt. It was also almost completely white, save for the vest that was black and a lavender stripe on the lapels. He tilted his head to the side as he narrowed his eyes at his reflection and hummed. “But it would look better on me if I was allowed to wear a pink shirt inside. I would like it then.”

“You fit the gay stereotype,” Gemma deadpanned as she shook her head and went to fetch the pink shirt Harry had pointed out earlier. Okay he might have spoilt himself a little when it came to clothes and New York had a great array of clothes for him. And shopping in Sitka again reminded him about one of the few reasons why he wanted to leave. There was only one boutique in town which sold suits. And in that one shop, there were only five white suits with little variety. There were a little more choices in the tradition black and white tuxedos, but it was his choice to rather go for the white ones since his mom had forbidden him any colours. To be honest, he wouldn’t have been able to wear a coloured one anyway since all of his were at home and the ones here didn’t call out to him. Maybe he did fit the stereotype. “New York had spoiled you, Harry. You know you can’t get your pick of clothes here, right?”

“Lavender is my colour, Gemma.”

“I thought it was lilac?”

Harry hummed. It was lilac, but for now lavender would do. He took off the blazer and unbuttoning the white shirt only to put on the pink one. There was no one else in the shop beside him and Gemma. The shop owner, Rosaline, had gone in the back to pick up a few more clothes. She had explained that she would be coming back to their house with them to deliver a few dresses for the wedding and then stay, since she was one of Anne’s friends. She had trusted them to handle everything by themselves as she flipped the sign on the front and left. Gemma leaned against the wall and watched him imploringly. She was wearing casual clothing at the moment. Her reasoning was that if she would have to walk around in heels and a sundress for the entire afternoon and evening, then she’d rather wear comfortable clothes now to make up for it. Harry really didn’t understand her much, really. As Harry buttoned up the pink shirt, he looked over at his sister. “I’m worried about Louis.”

“So you’ve said,” she replied, not looking any different. Harry hummed as looked back into the mirror and observed his reflection, feeling satisfied. Pink was a good colour on him, as he always said. And since lavender and lilac were shades of pink anyway, his point was unchanged. He liked the soft colours. “And if I’m being honest, I am too. From what I learned from mom, Niall is going to be with him. Niall is a good guy really but since he doesn’t know about this whole thing, he wouldn’t be able to calm him down if Louis freaks. And from what you’ve told me, he freaks a lot when in stress, right?”

Harry snorted in spite of himself, watching his face go fond in the mirror at the memory. So maybe he could understand why everyone thought they were a couple. “He gets jittery and goes very silent and rigid. Someone has to keep him talking through it else he will just... break down, I suppose. Luckily I’ve managed to calm him down always but right now I’m worried. We haven’t even talked about this wedding thing and it’s been hours since I’ve seen him.”

“Two hours,” Gemma supplied, shrugging as she pushed off the wall.

Harry shouldn’t have headed with Robin to meet his mother, mainly since she immediately insisted they go to town. Robin had laughed at him and excused himself since Anne had saddled him with some work. She had also taken Harry’s phone and instructed Gemma on a few things while pushing him back to his room. Louis wasn’t there when he walked up again, he noticed with a frown. And since Harry didn’t have his phone with him, he couldn’t call him to ask about it. Feeling helpless, he changed and left Louis a note saying he’d be going to town. He hadn’t seen Louis since and couldn’t get the thought of him out of his mind.

“I don’t think he has run away yet or we’d have known,” Gemma continued, almost talking to herself. She walked up to him, fussing with his collar which was a habit she had definitely picked up from mom. “I would have gotten thousands of texts from mom. So that extremity is crossed out for us. Anyway, if you’re done with your selection then we should head back. You still have to pick your shoes, which you insisted to pick from your own collection. That would take a while.”

“Okay.” Harry frowned at the abrupt conversation change before nodding. “Should I change back into my clothes?”

“Wedding is in an hour, Harry,” she stated, raising her eyebrows. Harry kept frowning back in confusion and she sighed, shaking her head. “Why do you want to change again right now? Just wear your jacket on top, pick up the other clothes and leave. Mom will kill me if we’re late and I think we are. We wasted a lot of time eating.”

“Brunch was your idea,” he pointed out, knowing his growling stomach also contributed to it. She shrugged, turning away to sift through the clothes rack. He wrinkled his nose as went into the changing room, purposely trying to ignore the initial part of the conversation. The wedding was in an hour and he had to admit he was freaking out. If he and Louis had got time to discuss the details of their arrangement it wouldn’t have been this disastrous. But seeing as they hadn’t discussed anything and the last Harry had seen of him was when he locked himself in the bathroom, it was going to be disastrous. He needed to find Louis somehow, convey his real feelings before they went forward with this. He caught his face in the mirror on his way back, not liking how the anxious thoughts were visible on his face. Gemma was still turned away when he return and he sighed. “Say Gemma, where do you think Louis would be right now?”

Gemma hummed, flipping her hair over her shoulder as he gave him an assessing look. She carded her fingers through her hair, tilting her head to the side in thought. “Let’s see. If mom instructs Niall to take Louis suit shopping then he should be headed here. Or has already been here. Either way, there’s a good chance he’s been in town.”

Harry gasped, widening his eyes as he halted in his motion towards the door. “Wait. How did I not think of that before? Of course he would be in town. But oh wait, he’s scared of the boat! He’ll be scared. Maybe I should wait for him here.”

Gemma heaved out a long-suffering sigh, shaking her head at him. “Oh no Harry, don’t you get it? Rosaline is leaving with us right now. Which means he’s not coming in this shop now. Probably she’s taking his suit with him. Probably.”

“Oh.” Harry frowned, heart sinking at the thought. It would be too good to be true if they happened to cross paths in the town, not as if it was a large one. He would have definitely known if Louis was here. His sixth sense never failed him. It meant he would meet Louis at the barn directly, as they exchanged their vows. It made his stomach swoop in happiness, the thought more excitable than scary. He smiled in spite of himself, to which Gemma shook her head again. “So do you think I might be able to find him in our house? In one of the rooms?”

“Maybe,” she said idly before she wrinkled her forehead. She looked contemplative, lips quirking up as if she had an idea. But before she could voice it, Rosaline popped up from the back with a cheery smile on her face.

“Are we ready to leave?” she asked, holding up two bags in her hands and having changed into a new, formal sundress. Gemma nodded, smiling over whatever she was going to say as she opened the door for her. She shot Harry a meaningful look as she followed, leaving him to pull on his jacket hurriedly and follow her out. Rosaline closed up the store behind them while Gemma and Harry hurried ahead.

“I may have a way,” was all his sister said before climbing down the ladder. He frowned at her before climbing into the boat. Harry sat in the back, watching the waves and letting them soothe him into a state of calm. Never had he been so anxious and nervous to see Louis, not even after he had made some minor mistake. Mainly because he knew the worst Louis would do is yell before calming down and doing some nice gesture as a way of apologising for the outburst. Harry knew the exact expression Louis would make when angry but right now, he couldn’t figure out how he would be looking. He imagined Louis would be beyond nervous, building up extreme scenarios in his head and in a desperate need of a cigarette. He knew he had brought a pack with him here yet Harry hoped he wouldn’t succumb to it.

Gemma had to literally shake him out of his Louis induced daze, frowning at him before nodding towards their house. She said nothing since they were within the earshot of Rosaline and like the rest of the people in this town, she was a loud gossip as well. Harry’s eyes were searching for Louis, hoping he’d find him somewhere before he found his mother. Luck wasn’t on his side since his mom came bounding over to him as soon as he stepped into the house, looking hassled but smiling brightly.

“Oh don’t you look handsome,” she cooed while fussing over his hair and straightening the lapels of his suit. Harry tried to smile through it all, eyes wandering over the room and not finding the brown head of hair he was looking for. He let himself be coddled by his mother instead, feeling a surge of affection towards her and guilt welling up as well. He was deceiving her, was fooling her into thinking that he and Louis were engaged with the aspect of need, not love. But his nerves overpowered both feelings, reminding him that he was actually marrying Louis, in front of a lot of strangers. A week ago, he thought he hated Louis. What was his life even?

“Thank you, mom,” he managed to say, trying to convey every emotion he felt. He frowned when her eyes turned misty, ready to console her. “You’re not going to cry, are you?”

“Of course not,” she denied with a laugh while she discreetly wiped under her eyes. Someone called for her to which she yelled something back, loud enough to make Harry flinch back. She looked apologetic when she looked at him again, forehead creasing with worry. “I’m sorry baby I have no time for you right now. This is the most important day of your life and I can’t even talk to you with ease. But I love you so much and I can’t wait for you to walk down the aisle, all right. But for now, Liam will take you to another room where you can sit and breathe. Gemma dear, you’re freed from your duty and can go dress up.”

“But ma,” she started before being shushed and reprimanded by their mother. Gemma threw her hands in the air and let herself be pushed away, all the while giving Harry a pointed look. He didn’t understand the meaning of it but nodded, hoping he would be able to lose himself in the crowd and find Louis. No such luck since Liam appeared almost instantaneously by his side, guiding him to another room on the first floor itself. It most likely was very far from where Louis was and the thought was disappointing.

“Are you excited?” Liam asked brightly as he closed the door behind them and locked it. Harry glanced forlornly at the closed door before giving his friend a small smile. Liam was dressed up in a charcoal grey suit with a blue tie, more colour than Harry had been allowed. He looked happy, excitable like a puppy and Harry felt as if nothing about his friend had changed in the past few years. Happy, helpful old Liam. “I am so excited. Never thought I’d see this day so soon.”

“Thank you, Liam,” Harry said as genuinely as he could muster as he walked up to the window. This room was at the other corner of the floor and without the balcony like Harry’s room had, hence he didn’t have a view of the sea. He could see the woods, could see the swaying trees and watched them intently. After a few minutes he turned towards the mirror, frowning when he saw his hair had been blown to a side by the wind. He ran his fingers through his hair to fix them, still frowning at his reflection. “Do you have any hair product Liam?”

“Sure what do you need?” Liam asked, and Harry could hear him rummaging through a bag. He looked towards his friend, who sure enough was taking things out of a duffle and placing it on the bed. Harry’s widened as he saw the vast range of hair product he had brought along with him, unable to hold back a chuckle as Liam held up a hair wax and a hair spray expectantly. Harry laughed as he accepted the hair wax, shaking his head. “I have everything with me. Five combs, three types of hair products, a curler and straightener, if need be. I also borrowed Ruth’s large makeup kit if you want. I’ll bring you anything else you want, so don’t hesitate.”

“Okay Liam thanks,” Harry said as he styled his hair, laughing due to his friend. He desperately wanted to tell him to bring him Louis, just to see if he could. He saw the overeager look on Liam’s face and decided against it since it would put him in a moral crisis. “I’m good for now.”

“Alright,” he chirped as he sat on the bed amidst the skincare products he had brought. “It’s a shame you don’t have time to select a best man, Harry because I’d be the bestest best man you’ll ever have.”

Harry laughed some more, knowing it would be true. Liam was always the overachiever and had this strange mothering nature which sure as hell would make him a great best man. He would know how to calm him down. But Niall would be upset so he had hoped he wouldn’t have to make that choice. He could see Liam sitting patiently from the corner of his eyes, getting restless by the silence from Harry’s end. He chuckled when Liam gave up and spoke.

“So tell me about Louis,” he started, bushy eyebrows rising up his wide forehead. Harry saw his lips quirk up in a smile in the mirror immediately. Wow he was whipped. “What’s he like? Or tell me about work? Is New York everything you thought it was?”

“Well...” he started as he talked about everything Liam had asked. He mostly talked about Louis though and Liam stared at him knowingly, making Harry falter in the middle of his sentence as he wondered how he hadn’t realised earlier how deep his feelings for Louis actually were. What would Louis be thinking right now, he wondered and worried a little.

***

Louis looked out at the sea, feeling the cool air brushing against his face and sighed. He certainly envied Harry for the view he grew up. He had never thought of the sea as a calming presence before, mainly because he didn’t have much time to be around it and his irrational fear of drowning. But he understood it now. He felt at ease. With Niall on one side and the sea on other, Louis barely had time to think about anything which was a good thing. He had too much time on his hands anyway but he also had Niall to break the silence and Louis owed a lot to him hence.

Louis had somehow managed to coerce everyone into letting him stay on the island instead of venturing into town. He had the skill of convincing people with sweet words, had used to his benefit a lot of times to bring more authors into his wings. So even with his nerves taking half his attention, the skill came to him easy. He had struck a middle ground where he would just wear one of the suits he had brought along on a whim. Harry usually gave him a disapproving glance whenever he saw Louis had over packed, often telling him those extra clothes would be of no use. And usually, they were of no use. But this time, they had saved Louis out of two more boat rides so he was proven right yet again. He wanted to brag to Harry, if he could meet him that is.

First he had to convince Niall, which didn’t take much effort since the lad wasn’t keen on driving the motorboat anyway. Anne was difficult to track amongst the people but it wasn’t that hard to convince her either, since she didn’t have much time to put up a fight. Gammy had asked what he would be wearing and when he said it would be one of his favourite suits for good luck, she cooed and agreed with him as well but not before giving him a rose from one of the bouquet. He had met Harry’s stepfather before he climbed up the stairs, who congratulated him heartily before being called away. Niall had to steer him away since he was half surprised half in shock at seeing the number of people that had accumulated. Seriously, that guy had been a big help since this morning. Louis owed him a lot.

“And that's how I got banned from one of the famous clubs in LA,” Niall finished with a flourish and followed it up with a raucous laugh. Louis laughed along as well, distractedly since he hadn’t heard the middle of the story. Niall didn’t seem to mind as he wiped away his tears and didn’t notice the manic quality to Louis’ face. There was an underlying sense of panic that was threatening to overtake him the minute he had a moment to himself. So he half listened to Niall’s stories about Harry’s childhood, smiling before regretting everything. Niall had long moved to his own stories, which involved a lot of travelling to places even though he didn’t specify his job. Or he might have but Louis didn’t know since every word Niall spoke was clouded by his own internal panic. “So Louis, do you have any fun stories? Or something about Harry? I would love new teasing material on him since I haven’t got anything in three years.”

Louis blinked at him surprise, taken aback when he was asked about himself after two hours of nonstop talking from Niall’s side. The only gap in the conversation had been when they had a mini snack break where Niall gorged on cinnamon rolls like a starved person while Louis ate just one cinnamon roll, feeling queasy. It seemed like a long time ago. Still, Louis rummaged around for any fun stories but the ones he had were from his childhood. He was a completely different person then for sure and he really did not want to delve into that. Hence he fiddled with the ends of his shirt. It reminded him he had to change soon since there was only an hour left to go before he would be called into the barn. Louis was waiting for the last possible minute to change, fearing Harry would bow out of the whole and Louis would look stupid in a suit. He wondered if he should voice it out to Niall, who was looking back imploringly when there was a knock on the door. It saved Louis from answering and he sighed internally as he glanced towards the door and Niall rushed towards it. Louis’ mind immediately jumped to the worst-case scenario, where Harry had come to say he couldn’t do it. He didn’t know if he would be disappointed or glad if that happened.

“And who would that be?” Niall asked almost to himself as he unlocked the door and pulled it open. Louis squinted his eyes and craned his neck to see who it was, frowning when he realised it was the other Styles sibling. “Oh Gemma, hey.”

“Hello Niall,” Gemma greeted with a wide smile as she stood with her hands clasped behind her back. It reminded Louis of Harry and his stomach fluttered, like the bastard it was. “May I come in?”

“Sure you can consider this your home,” Niall replied with a cackle as he stepped aside to let her in. Louis stood up and walked inside the room and was puzzled when Gemma didn’t look his way. “So what are you doing here? Shouldn’t you be with Haz right now?”

She hummed, shrugging casually as a strange look crossed her eyes. “Yeah I was with him but then Liam took my place since I had to change. I was getting a little bored so I thought why not let you off the hook for a few minutes till you get changed.”

“Did you get tired of Harry?” Niall asked as he wiggled his eyebrows. Gemma laughed half-heartedly, eyes flitting to Louis for the briefest of minutes as she shook her head. “You know you can tell me. I know how he can be. Wedding is his biggest dream, no? He’s all grown up, walking down the aisle and all.”

“Yeah I know,” Gemma said, giving a small, almost sad smile. Louis frowned further, knowing this wasn’t how Gemma usually was but Niall was oblivious, in a very merry mood. “So there isn’t much time for the wedding so you can go and change. I’ll stay. I have Louis here to talk to.”

“Ah are you giving him the older sister speech?” Niall teased, smirking at Louis while talking as if he wasn’t there at all. Louis watched the exchange with narrowed eyes, suspicious why Gemma of all people was here. “It’s alright with me. I was looking for someone to come and free me for a few minutes to get dressed. Not that you’re a burden Louis but you know, I need to change. Bye Louis.”

“Bye,” Louis said absently while keeping his eyes pinned on Gemma, who was decidedly looking away.

“Be back before you know it,” Niall threw over his shoulder before he left, shutting the door behind him. Louis kept staring at the back of Gemma’s head, counting to five in his head until she turned. Her face looked pained, eyebrows scrunched together and looking distinctly like Harry at that moment. Or it might be Louis seeing what he wanted to see. But Gemma was frowning as she marched up to the bed and sat down heavily and let out a long-suffering sigh.

“Are you alright?” Louis found himself asking as he felt concerned for the woman. She shrugged in reply, pouting at the floor and Louis took it as a cue to sit on the bed beside her, keeping a little distance of course. Maybe she wanted to twist his neck who knew. “What happened? Is Harry alright?”

“It’s not about what has happened, Louis, it’s what's about to happen,” she exclaimed before scowling at the floor, bunching the sheets in her fist. Louis shifted a little away from her but he understood where she was coming from and was dreading the same thing. Of course Gemma was not on board with the wedding thing and why would she be when she knew the truth. She also probably didn’t want Harry to go through with the traditionally married route which would make it all real. It would make this more than just a marriage of convenience. It would be make it more sentimental. Which loving sister would want that for her brother right? Of course. “This is all too sudden for my taste. And who would convince mom and Gammy. It’s not like they listen. I just wanted the two of you to talk but now it’s just like... whatever. By the way, how are you holding up?”

“Me?” Louis asked, taken by surprise by the change of topic and her earnest question. He had expected her to proceed to yell at him really, but she had come here out of concern. It was a touching gesture and he was sure he didn’t deserve it. So he laughed nervously, feeling the panic bubble up his throat and seep into his voice as he spoke. “I’m fine. Mighty fine. Very fine.”

Gemma frowned, looking at him disbelievingly. “You sure?”

Louis nodded, trying to not look so wide-eyed, which made Gemma further concerned. “Sure. But how’s um, Harry? How is he doing? Is he mad at me?”

Gemma blinked in surprise, tilting her head to the side. “Why would he be mad at you? No, he’s just a lot worried about you. He has been planning escape routes to come and meet you to talk but couldn’t. So I came in instead, to ask how you are.”

“He worries too much,” Louis said softly as he ignored the latter part of the sentence. It would mean Gemma cared too, despite everything. He fiddled with the small hole in his sweatpants, smiling without meaning to at the thought of Harry caring about him still. It was a surprise no one had realised he loved Harry. “I don’t know why he does, really. I just keep putting him in bad situations, sometimes being outright rude to him and he still... cares. He shouldn’t look out for me.

“Of course he does since he...” Gemma cut herself off, clearing her throat as she stood up and strolled towards the balcony. Louis frowned and stood up. Her face was turned away when she softly said, “He cares too much.”

“Well he shouldn’t,” Louis said equally as soft. Affection welled up in his chest and so did guilt. He pursed his lips, scuffing his socked feet against the carpet. “I’m not worth caring for. He’s too nice with me. But let’s not talk about that. Why are you really here, Gemma?”

“To talk to you, of course,” she said simply as she turned, arching her eyebrows and resting her hip against the wall. Louis sighed, flicking his fringe to a side as he waited. “Louis, are you sure you want to do this? Are you sure you want to marry like this? Because I think I can convince everyone to let you back out. Or at least I can try, no promises. If you’re not fine with this. Are you?”

“I guess,” Louis muttered and Gemma gave him a piercing stare that made him feel scared.

“Don’t guess,” she commanded, tucking her hair behind her ear. Louis shrunk on himself due to the intensity of her glare. “Tell me. Are you really okay with everything as it is going? Are you happy right now? Do you care about Harry even a bit? Because I don’t want to see him get hurt.”

“Of course I care,” Louis objected shrilly, furrowing his eyebrows and shook his head. The notion was preposterous. It was insulting that she’d insinuate he didn’t care even a bit about that wonderful man. The whole problem was that he cared too, way too selfishly and that made him clutch on to him as long as he could. He was selfish enough to not promote him and was selfish enough to go through with this marriage. He was reluctant to call it off due to the selfless reason of not embarrassing Harry and the selfish reason of keeping him close. Harry was the only thing that he cared enough to be selfish about him. But Gemma’s eyes reminded him how wrong he was in doing that and the anger died out.

“I care about him more than I’ve cared about anyone else,” Louis continued in a softer tone, looking away from Gemma. “He’s something special, holds a special place in my heart and I can’t even act like he’s just an assistant to me. He’s the first person to completely understand me, I think and that's a big deal. I’m not good with spoken word, which is ironic since I’m great with written words. I’m lousy with showing my affections so I’ve sent him gifts hoping he’d understand which in the hindsight, of course he wouldn’t. I don’t know what he tells you about me, but I’m sure you think of me as a cold-hearted person right? To a limit, I am. But also, it’s a fake persona I’ve adapted to defend myself and I really can’t shake it off. And every second of this is paining me, putting Harry through this is paining but I can’t deal with the alternative either. It hurts me this wouldn’t be real, that Harry would never like me for real as much I like him.”

Louis sniffed and wiped under his eyes. He was crying without knowing it, his voice getting choked up due to it until he gave trying to speak. Louis tried not to cry if he could help it but he didn’t know why he was crying right now. He could see the pity in Gemma’s eyes as she reached out towards him but he took a step back, shaking his head. He didn’t want pity, especially not from Harry’s sister. She was the wrong person to confess to as much as he did. That's why he took a deep breath in, blinking his eyes to hold back his tears. “I’m sorry, Gemma.”

“Oh Louis no,” she started, taking a step towards him before she was cut off by the resounding knocks on the door. She pursed her lips, dropping her hand while Louis walked towards the balcony to hide his tear stained face. “Oh hey Niall. Back so soon.”

“Told you I’ll be back before you know it,” Niall replied cheerily. He was probably still at the door, Louis couldn’t see but he certainly hadn’t caught on to the tension in the room. “Oh and Lou, shouldn’t you get dressed as well?”

“Yeah,” Louis croaked, cringing at his voice before clearing his throat. He closed his eyes, feeling the salty air against his eyelids as he slipped into his business voice. “It would take me a few minutes to dress but would you stay outside till then, Niall?”

“Ooh someone’s shy,” Niall teased before laughing. Gemma stayed mum and the click of her heels could be heard getting away, possibly towards the door. Louis chuckled along with Niall, fooling even himself with the levelness of his voice. “Alright I’ll stand outside. But you have to be quick. I get bored quickly and I might barge in on you half-naked. Mind.”

Louis laughed along once again but this time tears were unwillingly springing to his eyes and clouding his vision. He was aware Niall was still speaking, probably saying goodbye as the door clicked shut soon after. His laughs turned a little manic until they turned into sobs and he was no longer trying to mask it. He sunk to his knees, feeling overwhelmed with guilt and the gravity of what he was about to do. He was a bad person, a truly horrible person and Lottie was right. He cradled his face in his hands. It wasn’t easy being alone and certainly not when he was upset. His thoughts were spiralling out of control, pulling him down and cementing the idea that had planted itself an hour back. He managed to crawl to his bag somehow, rummaging through it in search of his other phone. Niall didn’t know that Louis carried two phones with him. He had snatched the one out of his hands, claiming it was for his own good. But he didn’t know that the other, business phone was tucked into the folds of his suit and he fished it out. He didn’t bother wiping away the fresh round of tears that were flowing down his cheek, blinking just enough to see and find the contact he was looking for. Pressing his phone to his ears he waited for a few seconds before hearing the familiar voice.

“Lottie? You were right. I’m a bad person. But I need you to do something for me, no questions asked.”

***

Louis had never been this sure of a decision in his life before. There really were no second thoughts or doubt, which usually were a constant presence. He was going to do this.

After having a short talk with Lottie, in which he explained her about the situation a little more and she reprimanded him, he was feeling better. He needed to hear all that, and after she calmed down, she agreed to help him too. The moment she realised Louis was crying, she went soft and consoled him so by the end of it, he wasn’t crying anymore. Sure he felt like someone had shattered his chest with a sledgehammer multiple times and left him trained, but he himself was the cause so he gritted his teeth and dealt with it. There was no other way. He washed his face to remove all traces of the tear tracks and hoped the redness of his eyes died down. Then he changed into his favourite navy blue suit. It was his favourite one, the one he wore whenever he was anxious about something. And right now, he was a lot anxious. Memories flooded his mind as soon as he glanced at himself in the mirror, remembering this was the same one he had bought when he was finally made the editor in chief. Buying it was the best decision he had made. His life had only gone up from there, especially since the day he wore it to office was the first time he met Harry for the interview. Over the years he dubbed it lucky, even though it actually wasn’t. He hoped Harry didn’t remember the suit from their first meeting but of course he wouldn’t. It was more than three years ago after all. Yet he did remember and was picking this over the other black suit he had brought along. He hoped for the best.

Niall had immediately approved, whistling even when Louis let him in. And for once, Louis let himself forget reality and enjoy the compliments. He blushed when Niall went on to say the suit highlighted his curves before adding that Harry would be quote unquote gobsmacked.

“Who even says gobsmacked?” Louis mocked, laughing to himself while fully knowing it was a word he used a lot. Niall hadn’t been the least offended, immediately laughing as if Louis had said the funniest thing. Really, Louis didn’t understand him at all.

But then, he shouldn’t be taking Niall’s word for anything especially after seeing his clothes. He was wearing black trousers and a black shirt with a gaudy green suit jacket on top that had a giant clover over his heart. He looked like he was taking part in St. Patrick’s Day parade and not going to a wedding. But he looked so goddamn pleased that Louis didn’t have the heart to tell him that. He let himself be led by the lad to the barn that was located a little away from the main house. Hence it led him to where he was currently standing – at the makeshift altar in the barn, facing a crowd of at least fifty people gathered and seated and judging him. He was fine.

“He always takes so bloody long to get ready,” Niall commented and Louis tore his eyes away to look back at him. He had only found out when he had entered the barn that Niall was the minister, the one marrying them off for some reason. It explained why he looked so giddy and Louis wondered how he had managed to convince Anne of that idea. Especially since he had picked the green suit. “But you already know that.”

“Yeah,” Louis said, even though Niall was wrong. Harry took little time to get dressed, he took more to decide. He knew that from the times they’ve gone to another city for a festival and got late due to Harry’s indecisiveness. “Maybe.”

Louis thought that Niall had been picked only because Anne was hassled with the last minute wedding and hadn’t found anyone else. But he wouldn’t voice that, of course. Still Anne’s efforts weren’t in vain, he thought as he looked around and not directly at the stranger’s stares. Glowing orbs were hung from the ceiling, the brightest source of light in the room without them directly hitting one’s faces. There were smaller sources of light as well, like the candles placed on top of slabs, which were surely a fire hazard but they looked beautiful. Fairy lights hung from the ceiling, especially on the makeshift arch behind Louis and it looked heavenly. Flowers and vines were entwined and stuck onto the walls of the barn, giving off a soft, sweet smell. There was a band playing too, crammed into the place and Louis suspected they were just local musicians. But the soft chimes were calming and entrancing nevertheless. There were some fifty odd chairs in the centre with enough space for the aisle. There were also flowers strewn on the carpet. It was too beautifully decorated in such less time and Louis admired them for it. It would also be a very simple wedding, something Louis didn’t know he wanted until he walked in.

Louis pulled on his collar and adjusted his tie, getting antsy the more he stood there idly. He let his eyes roam over the first two rows, finding Liam’s assuring, bright smile greet him. Gemma was seated in the front right ahead of him, sizing Louis up from the minute she had sat down. She engaged in quiet conversation with Anne, who was seated beside her. Anne looked a little tired but beautiful in a light yellow dress. Beside her was Robin, who was smiling at him as well. Louis hadn’t had a proper conversation with him yet but the man didn’t look like he hated Louis. Yet. Gammy was supposed to bring Harry, or as he was told and had chosen to be the one to give Harry away. She asserted her birthday girl rights on them or so he had heard. Louis immensely liked the woman.

Everyone else was a stranger to him so he didn’t look at them anymore, keeping his eyes intent on the entrance instead. There was a half archway of flowers and vines with fairy lights intertwined. It might be the thing that had most work put in and it showed. He hoped Harry would arrive soon since he had missed his face in the past few hours. So many things left unsaid, so many things left to share. And as if he had heard Louis’ mental pleas, Harry finally arrived.

Louis was left gaping at the sight of him, dressed up in a white suit with a pink shirt underneath that for once, was buttoned all the way up. There were lavender highlights on his suit, which of course since Harry hated wearing just one colour on him and it just made him look softer. He was wearing silver glitter boots that didn’t go along with the rest of the outfit and it was so endearing that Louis to bite his bottom lip to stop his smile. Harry had his head ducked until he walked up to the start of the carpet, with Gammy on his arm in a white dress beside him. No one but Louis and probably Niall had noticed them arrive and the chatter still continued. But to Louis, nothing else but his boy existed. And when Harry looked up, right when he was standing underneath one of the orbs, his eyes caught the light around him and reflected it as he smiled brightly. Louis felt his breath knocked out of him and he probably let out a soft sigh which made everyone stop and take notice of the other groom.

Louis vaguely noticed the music had changed and that everyone was standing. He barely noticed Niall behind him jeering at Harry and Liam reprimanding him quietly. He barely even took notice of Gammy, who was tucked into Harry’s side with a wide smile and teary eyes as she let go of him. But Louis did notice when Harry almost tripped over his feet before flushing completely red. He noticed how Harry’s eyelashes fluttered and he looked almost shy when he met Louis’ eyes. He noticed how some curls were trying to free themselves from the hold of the hair product he had used. He noticed how Harry looked ethereal and had a pearly glow to him, looking the brightest thing in the barn. It almost seemed like they were getting married for real when Louis took Harry’s hand and smiled. Except it was not. Nothing about this was real, except the smile Louis sported. They weren’t a real couple, weren’t getting married for love, no. It was a marriage of convenience, something to keep Louis in the States. His smile dimmed at the realisation, heart panging in his chest and Harry noticed, of course he did. His eyebrows rose in question, asking him how he was and Louis just squeezed his hand in response, knowing it was half hearted. He looked at Niall instead, who was giving a speech with a wide, fond smile on his face. Louis could barely hear it, busy feeling Harry’s eyes on him.

Louis knew he wasn’t doing a good job of assuring him but there was nothing else he could do. It would hurt this way, he thought, blinking to get rid of the blurriness in his eyes. It was just some dirt.

Harry knew something was amiss the moment Louis’ smile dropped. It hadn’t been that noticeable but to someone who was used to reading him and judging his reactions, it was that obvious. He looked gorgeous in that navy blue suit of his and he certainly was surprised Louis managed to convince his mother to wear his own suit. Harry could never but then, Louis was that charming. Harry couldn’t take his eyes off him, knowing that once they get married he would be able to confess his feelings. Sure he might fall flat on his face with the confession but there was no way he could keep it in. Just those few hours had made Harry miss him and yearn to see him and it was worth it when Louis looked the way he did. It might be that he was giddy walking down the aisle and didn’t notice Louis’ guards that had been drawn up. But he did notice it when he was standing right beside, hyper aware of the strange vibe of finality radiating from him. Yet the wedding continued as normal, with Louis being proper, way too proper and slightly stiff but Harry blamed it on nerves. He was nervous too, stumbling over the vows that he had written a few minutes ago.

Niall was a welcome distraction, cracking jokes and making everyone chuckle. And Harry wondered how Anne had allowed him to be their minister. Probably lack of time. When Louis said ‘I do’, there was an underlying finality to it which Harry picked up on. There was no way he could ask about it but they had time now since the ceremony was almost over. Louis slid the rose gold ring over Harry’s finger with a tight-lipped smile and Harry had been giving his grandfather’s ring to put on Louis’ finger. It had blue stones on it, which Harry had noted were the exact same shade as Louis’ eyes. They could leave.

As they walked back down the aisle and towards light, Harry’s heart was beating fast. The cheering around him was a distant sound and he couldn’t help but think he was free. They were sort of free. He was grinning, as he stepped into the bright light before flinching as it assaulted his eyes. Louis wiggled his hand free and Harry let him, using both his hands to shield himself as he walked towards the house. He was confused when Louis gripped his arm and pulled him back. He frowned as he looked at Louis, who was blinking blankly at him.

“Harry,” he started grimly and the hair on the back of Harry’s neck rose in alarm. It was as if lot of unsaid things were there in just that one word. He focused his gaze on the furrow on Louis’ forehead and the sad tilt to his lips while his eyes looked miles away. Harry’s heart was beating quickly for a whole new reason now, anxiety and confusion filling up his veins. “I’m sorry, Harry.”

“What?” he asked, gulping as the previous high was wearing off quickly and dread settled in his tummy. Louis bit his lip, eyes wandering all over Harry’s face as if taking him in. Without warning he placed his palm on Harry’s cheek and gave him a soft, sweet kiss. A goodbye kiss. Harry’s eyes closed instinctively as he leaned into it, lips parting expectantly but the second kiss never came. The warmth of Louis’ palm was taken away and the grip on Harry’s arm was loosened as Louis stepped away. Harry heard his footsteps walk away but he was in surprise, turning only to catch him watching quickly towards the house. Harry didn’t know if time has slowed down or picked up its pace but Louis was getting away by the second while he stood there, toes dug in the ground. He was swimming in a daze, could make out the distant chatters as the wedding guests piled out of the barn and exchanged jovial words. It made him snap out of it and inhale sharply. Louis had done something. He had taken a hasty decision.

“Fuck,” Harry muttered under his breath before he took off in the direction of his house, assuming that's where Louis would be. His hair was getting messed by the wind but he didn’t care, sweeping it away from his face and kept moving forward. He swore under his breath as he dug his feet in and came to a halt in the middle of the empty living room.

“Louis?” Harry called as he looked around but the house looked barren, no hint of Louis there. He was panting as he raced up the stairs. He almost slid on the way to his room, throwing the door open with a bam to find it, unsurprisingly, empty. “Louis, are you in here?”

There was no noise to greet him, nothing to assure him of Louis’ presence or the whiff of his strong cologne that was still lingering in his mind. He checked the bathroom and the balcony but there was no sign of the other man. There were no sounds apart from his boots that were slapping against the floor and his heart trying to beat out of his chest. He rested against the balcony door frame, catching his breath while feeling dreadful and in shock. He looked in the corner and of course Louis’ bags were missing. It was just Harry’s one bag there, with an envelope resting on top of it. He scrambled to pick it up, sitting on the floor as he gingerly opened the envelope. He didn’t realise his hands were shaking until then or that there were tears streaming down his face but he wiped them with the back of his hand as he spied the familiar, slant cursive writing on the envelope and inside. He held back a sob as he opened the letter, a page torn from the journal he carried, and stared at the small letters before he started reading it.

_ Dear Harry. _

_ By the time you’d be reading this I’ll be long gone... or maybe not. But hopefully, I’ll be at the Sitka airport at the very least. I’ve found someone to take me to town and then the airport so I’ll be out of here as soon as I can. So my letter will greet you when you go back to you room, which you’re reading so you know and yeah I rambled away a little. Sorry, not used to writing for a reason like this. _

_ You know Harry, I’ve revealed a lot about myself to you in these long two days. Not everything, but a lot more than what I’ve ever revealed to anyone in like, ever. And you know how I’ve been for the past three years. I’m used to thinking about only my career and my sister, both of which are in New York and I couldn’t bear the thought of going back to England. That place no longer is home, you know. There is no one waiting, unlike for you. You have such a loving, caring family here in Sitka and I don’t know what I was thinking intruding on this. I had no business to do that, none at all. I had almost forgotten how a family feels until I saw yours and I felt even more guilty for the position I put you in. It was wrong of me to ask you to choose your career over morals, I’m sorry. I am an arsehole, but you know that, don’t you? _

_ You won’t have to deal with me for long. I’m leaving for London next week. I’ll talk with James the minute I get back and spend the week finding something to get Ben fired over, which wouldn’t be hard. Don’t worry, I’ll be sure to hold my promise to you and publish your book. I lied about it actually. You Harry, have a great way of writing, superior to the ones I edit for a living. I knew you were watching, you know, you’re not subtle so I pretended to discard your manuscript but I read it all, edited it too but I was afraid to publish it in the fear of losing you. You’re a great assistant Harry and a greater person. I’ve been nothing but a prick to you for the past three years and you don’t even know how sorry I am for it. In my defence, I don’t know how to act around you or treat you I guess. You’re way more familiar than just an assistant, but you’re still my assistant. You make me feel a certain way, Harry, always have and I care for you more than I should, in case it wasn’t clear. I’ve been alone all these years but sometimes, you make it feel like home. I don’t mean to be cheesy, but that's the truth. _

_ I was planning to run away before I realised that this was Sitka and people would talk. I didn’t want to give you another reason to be disappointed in me so I stayed. We’re not legally married yet, so I gave you a way out of everything. You can make up whatever excuse you want about me, blame everything on me and quell the gossip. I’ll be alright. We’ll just be in each other’s life for a week now, Harry but feel free to stay there if you want. You need a vacation free from me. I was selfish with you, trying to keep you close because I liked you. I know I’m wrong you can hate me. And this is getting too long. _

_ Once again, I don’t know I was doing coming here and intruding on your family, Harry, I am sorry. And I feel immensely guilty about how it went down. Hope you’ll forgive me someday. _

_ Yours sincerely, Louis. _

Harry blinked blankly at the end of the page, hardly able to believe what Louis had written. He read it once again, feeling numb inside and a mess of emotions that weren’t strong enough to make their singular presence known. His thoughts were rattling against his skull, the panicky feeling from earlier making him jumpy when someone called out his name. He looked towards the door, finding his sister’s head peeked in. She was smiling tentatively and stopped when she saw his state, which he only assumed also looked terrible. He sobbed at her and she stepped in quickly, bolting the door behind her before she walked towards him.

“Why are you crying?” she asked, and Harry could only stare blankly at her. He felt a little speechless, taken aback by the latter. Gemma seemed to understand as she sat down on the floor beside him. She threw her arms around his neck to pull him in and he felt a little comforted by her warm embrace and perfume. He was so shocked by the turn of events. When Harry hadn’t said anything for a good five minutes, she let go of him before staring at him quizzically. Her eyes fell down to the letter clutched tightly between his fingers and she frowned. “What is this? And where is Louis?”

He didn’t answer and Gemma took it as a cue to snatch the letter from him. She stood up and her eyes flit over the page. Her eyebrows furrowed as she kept reading and huffed angrily when she reached the end. She didn’t really look angry, no, she looked frustrated as she threw her hands in the air and exhaled loudly. “I can’t fucking believe the two of you. Two oblivious idiots. Louis is a bloody freaking idiot.”

“He is a freaking idiot,” Harry echoed, almost whispering to himself while he frowned at his sister. She frowned back, lips pursed and eyes speaking a million words that he couldn’t understand. The fog in his mind was clearing now, the emotions making themselves known now that he had finally spoken something. Now that someone else had voiced out his thoughts. The strongest emotion that reared its head was anger, followed by confusion and exasperation. He rose up to his full height quickly, getting a head rush and he clutched his forehead as he gritted his teeth. “He is the biggest, selfish, self concerned, self righteous idiot. I cannot believe he would turn out to be like that, after all that we’ve been through. I am so angry.”

“Angry?” she asked, clear amusement in her voice. Harry narrowed his eyes at her as he spun on his heel and started pacing the room. The anger was becoming quite clear, making him restless and antsy so he took it out by walking around the room. It seemed to amuse Gemma further, who kept watching him with raised eyebrows. “Are you sure?”

“Yes I’m sure,” he hissed, running his hands through his hair and ruining the rest of his perfect quiff. He couldn’t care about it all, since he was in a bad mood. Plus, it wasn’t if his quiff was going to last more than an hour and he was fooling no one. “I think I’ve been angry with him this whole time, I can’t tell. It took me two days to come to terms with that fact that maybe you were right and I liked him after all. And he’s just completely blind to his discovery of mine and thinks that somehow I hate him and decides to flee right before I tell him that I love him. Can you believe that man? I do hate him, he’s right.”

“Harry, what are you talking about?” Gemma asked, interrupting him. Harry was taking deep breaths and speaking rapidly and that quickly changed her expression from one of amusement to one of concern as he leaned towards him. She looked ready to reach out and reassure him. But he was fine. He didn’t need reassurances and his thoughts were clear than ever. He knew he was just a little livid about Louis, the man who continued to be obtuse in any scenario regarding Harry.

“Gemma, you know, he always does this,” Harry continued, watching as his sister’s eyebrows knit together. Harry waved his hands around in frustration. “He always takes these decisions either without consulting me or blatantly ignoring what I tell him. He announced that we were engaged to James sporadically, without telling me. Not the first time. He never listens, or asks. His biggest flaw is to do the opposite of what I say. Like he took that stupid decision of publishing Grimshaw’s book two years ago. Sure it was successful but it brought on more controversy than sales which we could have done without and I had told him we would get. Then he leaves the country while his visa was being processed and not listening to me when I tried to stop him. Sure it got us a few extra authors but also, his application got rejected. Can you believe him? If he once listened to me, he would avoid a whole lot of problems.”

“I know, Haz,” Gemma said and Harry was turned away from her, looking out the balcony so he couldn’t see her. He knew she would be concerned about his flickering emotions and he didn’t want that. He kept his eyes on the distance see but he could hear a rustling sound. Normally, that would make him suspicious but not right now, since he was consumed with anger. “So what are you going to do?”

“I don’t know. He makes me so mad!”

“Of course he does,” Gemma replied in a softer tone and Harry felt the fight drain out of him at that, just as quick as it had come. Those four words were enough to make him realise, of course Louis made him mad. He hunched in on himself, closing his eyes as he focused on his breathing until it went back to normal. She was right. He wasn’t really angry, he was frustrated. He was frustrated with the man that understood everything except for Harry’s feelings about him. He was frustrated with the fact that he had fled, as Harry had expected him to, rather than stay five minutes and listen. It was very typical of him but that didn’t calm him, it made him frustrated because he knew Louis’ actions before Louis knew it himself. He shouldn’t. “But Harry, he loves you, otherwise he wouldn’t flee.”

“You’re right, Gemma,” Harry whispered and sighed before he turned. He frowned when he found Gemma at the corner of the room, fiddling with his bag. No actually, zipping it up. The clothes he had left hanging on the chairs and hooks weren’t there anymore and he knew Gemma had piled them in. “But what are you doing?”

“Harry.” She stood up straight, hands on her hips as she shot him an exasperated, frustrated look. The one she had carried ever since she had read the letter, but it had been directed at Louis then. He did not understand why he was getting that look from her when he was pretty sure he didn’t deserve it. “Aren’t you leaving?”

“I am?”

She sighed again, drawing closer until she placed her hands heavily on Harry’s shoulder and it made his knees buckle. “Listen, little brother. He implied he was telling his superiors he was quitting after he landed in New York right? He has yet to do that. But he also said he has his travel back there planned, which means he would be currently boarding the first flight back. So his flight leaves in about ten minutes, which will be too early for you to stop. So you have the next flight in an hour, and don’t look at me like that. I checked when you were busy having your dramatic crisis.”

“How?” was all he asked while busy processing everything she was rattling at him. “And an hour?”

“Yes,” she insisted as she shook him a little, eyes looking determined. “So tell me, Harry, are you going to spend the next hour fuming and complaining about him or are you going to chase him? He’s getting away by the second.”

“Yes,” Harry said, something fluttering in his stomach as he smiled. He was telling Louis how he felt. Finally. “Yes I’m going to chase him and stop him and shake him and tell him.”

“Do all that.” Gemma let go of him with a smile, picking her phone from the bed and he didn’t remember seeing it there. He didn’t bother asking, mainly because he didn’t care but she was typing furiously into it. “And hurry. I’m booking a ticket for you and you should leave now. I’ll make up some excuse about it. Go.”

Harry started laughing out of pure exhilaration. He was going to do this, as if he was in a movie. “Thank you, Gems, you’re the best sister in the world.”

“I know,” she replied flippantly, looking equally happy. “I’ll drop you to the airport. Sneak out the back and I’ll make something up and follow. Oh I have to get your phone from mom. I’ll do that too.”

“Alright,” Harry said as he took off the suit jacket, cheeks hurting with the intensity of his grin. “But first, I need a better outfit.”

***

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah I purposely ended the chapter where I did, even though the rest of it isn't that long. Ha.


	8. Chapter 8

It was a long way to New York, Harry thought, not having felt the time go this slow.

He had barely felt the hours go by when they were headed to Sitka, since he had Louis beside him whom he could talk to. But he could feel each second go by excruciatingly slow. He felt lonely this time, with a sleeping man for company while he didn’t even feel the least bit drowsy. His eyes were wide awake, his thoughts barely stopping and his fingers were restless. After a while he realised he was tapping Louis’ tune this whole time and wondered how he reached that stage. Everything was Louis’ fault.

Harry gorged on food after a while, nervously eating his way until his tummy was fool. He was careful not to spill anything on his lilac sweater of course, which he had worn on a whim. It was a good choice, since the fluffiness of it kept him at least a little comforted. And it reminded him of Louis and when he reached Louis’ door, he hoped it would help him too. He decided to watch a movie, but to add to his misery, the main male character had blue eyes, sending him spiralling into memories of his favourite blue eyes. It was insane but he missed Louis. And he had to keep his finger intertwined so as to not tap that darned tune again. He was too gone for Louis, he realised now and he didn’t know if it was a good or a bad thing.

Harry found another little distraction when he decided to write down the speech he would give Louis when he opened the door. If he didn’t open the door Harry had the key and the determination to confront him today, even if confrontations were the last thing he wanted to do. Harry wasn’t particularly good at them, usually caving in and stuttering. Not this time though, he was determined to say it all. If it worked out, he’d get a husband out of it and if it didn’t, well, there was always a promotion that Louis had promised. He had also promised to publish Harry’s book, something that he couldn’t believe. But that was a thought for later. Right now, he was writing himself a speech. And as he read it one last time before the plane reached New York, he thought it was the best fucking thing he had ever written, smiling to himself as he tucked the sheet of paper in his jeans pocket. He totally had this.

Harry’s confidence wavered gradually as his cab got closer to Louis’ apartment. It didn’t help that he was stuck in traffic now, only a few minutes away from where Louis currently was and his feet were itching to run. He let his fingers tap on his thigh, looking out the window before deciding fuck it and clutched his duffle. Paying the driver a little extra, he got out of the cab and swerved his way towards the sidewalk. From there he took off in a run, even though he hadn’t really planned for it. His silver, heeled shoes were not suited for running and his jeans certainly didn’t help him. But the air felt good in his hair and so did the adrenaline now pumping through his veins, as he expertly dodged people and ignored their curses. He was used to running through the streets of New York, thanks to Louis and it was very normal. Except for the fact that he was going to declare his love for Louis rather than running some errand.

Harry was certain he had misjudged the distance to Louis’ apartment, the more he ran. And by the time he reached the building, he was sweaty and out of breath. He collected himself as he leaned against the elevator wall, closing his eyes and he breathed through his mouth. The sweater made him excessively warm and as he checked in the mirror he realised he was looking worse for wear. His hair had become curlier due to sweat and wind, plastered against his forehead or blown to a side that was not flattering. His eyes looked wide and frantic, lips bitten and his cheeks were flushed. There was nothing he could do so Harry took out the sheet of paper from his pocket. His eyes flitted over the paper as he prepped himself for the confrontation. The tenth floor came all too quick and he stumbled out, still a little out of breath and anxious as hell. Did he have this?

Yes, yes he did.

Harry crumbled the paper in his hand and stuffed it back into his pocket, wiping his sweaty palms over his jeans while dropping his duffle outside Louis’ door. He hesitated, heart pounding loudly in his chest until it was all he could hear. His stomach was knotted with anxiety, mind running a mile with worry. He was sweating but due to nerves and he felt as if he couldn’t breathe. He swallowed the lump in his throat anyway, and rang the bell, waiting the few excruciating seconds until the door opened. He repeated in his head the start of his speech, lips parted as soon as the lock clicked.

“Louis how could you,” he want to say but instead could only squeak when the door actually opened. Harry really wasn’t expecting this, wasn’t expecting Louis to open the door looking like that, really.

It was a really strange sight, Harry thought and gasped as he took the man in. Louis’ hair was mused and sticking up from all sides as if he was just emerging from under a blanket. His eyes were red rimmed and puffy and glistening with unshed tears. His cheeks were pink, tear tracks on them and his lower lip was quivering. He looked surprised to see Harry there hence he was frozen before he sniffled and quickly wiped his face. It did nothing expect make his nose redder. The sight was disconcerting enough for Harry to forget the rest of his words. He went from anxious to concerned as he continued to gape at Louis, fingers itching to reach out and pull him into a hug. Louis gave him a small, watery smile that quite didn’t reach his eyes as he shrugged.

“Hi Harry,” he whispered, sounding so small, shaky and unlike himself. His usually bright eyes were dim and he was hunching in on himself, looking vulnerable. Harry didn’t know what to say, still taken aback. His eyes flit down to Louis’ hoodie which seemed to be an all too familiar shade of baby blue. Unless he was mistaken, the hoodie was Harry’s and the one he had taken to Sitka with him. There was also the embroidered ‘H’ in pink lettering and a heart around it located on where his heart would be, which confirmed it. Harry gaped at it, not knowing why Louis felt the need to take it with him. But also, it was two sizes too big on Louis and drowned him in, which was cute as hell. He never knew he had a thing for seeing someone else in his clothes but here he was, admiring the man in front of him. Louis self-consciously wrapped his arms over his chest, making Harry finally look up to watch the blush spread over his already pink cheeks. “What are you doing here right now? Are you back for your hoodie?”

Harry didn’t think before he acted, wrapping Louis in a hug and pulled him closer to his chest. Louis gave in with a squeak, his arms trapped between their chests but he made no moves to move away, swaying along with Harry. He let go of him after a few minutes but not before placing a chaste kiss on Louis’ cheek, feeling the warmth and the saltiness on his lips. Louis looked a picture of surprise when Harry looked at his face, taking two steps away. It was adorable really, as he kept blinking at Harry before he composed himself, pouting.

“What was that?” he asked softly, and Harry couldn’t help but smile before he tamed it.

“You are such a fucking idiot,” Harry said, a lot more fond than he had expected to be. It surprised Louis further, his eyebrows drawing while he kept frowning. It wasn’t what Harry had originally meant to say, but he was saying it anyway. “You know Louis, you infuriate me.”

“I know I’m such a –”

“No, don’t interrupt,” Harry said over him, pressing his finger over Louis’ lips to cut him off. Louis frowned but looked imploringly and Harry scrunched up his nose before continuing. “I have known you for three years now. And in the past three years that I’ve worked for you, you’ve done nothing but annoy me and saddle me with meaningless tasks that exhaust me. You’re very difficult to handle, you know that? Anyone else would resent you as well and I thought I did too, until I realised I didn’t. Any sane person would quit the job than deal with your temper, rudeness and excessive mood swings. But then, Gemma always tells me I was never sane.” He chuckled to himself, staring at Louis’ face. He didn’t look as surprised anymore but he looked curious, waiting. “You know, she kept insisting that I like you. I didn’t believe her. She also said I needed to take a break from you. And I did get a break from you, for half a day now and let me tell you, it was terrible. I was horribly anxious and wanting to see you, scold you as well and confess something.”

He paused, waiting to see if Louis would interrupt him. He didn’t, only frowning a little more and crossing his arms over his chest as he waited. Harry took in a deep breath, anxious again now that he was actually doing it.

“Okay here goes, I really like you Louis,” he blurted and Louis gasped, eyes widening.

“You do?” he whispered, eyebrows shooting up while Harry felt the blood rush to his face as he smiled and nodded.

“Maybe more than like you,” Harry added, circling his fingers against Louis’ wrist and pulling him closer. Louis came easy, placing his palm on Harry’s waist while looking at him with wide-eyed surprise. His eyes were no longer misty but bright, making Harry smile further. He tried to frown despite it, trying to convey he was at least a little bit upset right now. It was hard. “Your timing is so wrong though. It took me two days to realise I like you and I was dying to tell you this all of... yesterday? Well on the wedding day. But then you ran away, put a lot of space between us and I’m miffed about that but I forgive you. There’s something about you, Louis Tomlinson that makes me love you despite your extremely false and frigid nature.”

Louis giggled and tried to stifle the sound on Harry’s shoulder. It just made Harry’s heartbeat elevate as he smiled fondly at the man and felt the familiar butterflies take flight. As Louis leaned back, Harry could see his eyes had narrowed into happy slits. Despite his red-rimmed eyes and tear-stained cheeks, Louis was the most beautiful person ever. Harry couldn’t get enough of him.

“So Louis,” he started again, trying to sound grim but failing yet again since he was that happy. Louis bit down on his smile, looking at him with bright, hopeful eyes. Harry let go of Louis’ wrist, took a step back and bent down on one knee with a flourish, getting a quirk of eyebrow as a reaction. He couldn’t stop grinning and neither could Louis. “Would you marry me? Because I’d really like to date you.”

“I proposed to you first,” Louis replied with his usual charm, voice a little scratchy but he followed it up with a laugh. Harry laughed along, shaking his head at the ridiculousness while accepting the hand Louis offered. He let himself be pulled up and was happy seeing that his confident and slightly cocky Louis was back. “But yes, I would marry you, Harry Styles. But you knew it would be a yes anyway, since we are wearing our rings.”

“That we are,” Harry agreed as he took a step closer and linked their left hands together, biting his bottom lip. He felt a laugh bubble up his chest, bouncing on feet since he was jittery due to happiness this time. Louis’ eyes darted to his lips as he licked his own. Harry smirked, daring him to take the first step and Louis took the bait, surging forward to connect their lips. He let go of Harry’s hand and placed both his hands on Harry’s hips while Harry looped his arms around Louis. They kissed softly and close mouthed, with Harry tasting the saltiness on Louis’ lips while not minding it. He was smiling more than kissing really, not believing the events of just one day that had changed him into a different person. The week ended up being the best thing ever, and not a disaster as he had expected.

“Oh fucking finally,” a female voice exclaimed, startling Harry into jumping away from Louis. His eyes darted behind Louis, where a blonde girl was leaning against the doorframe. She had a wide but teasing smile on her lips, a knowing look in her eyes. She looked like a younger, blonder and female version of Louis, with the similarly arched eyebrows and stunning blue eyes. It was a wonder Harry had never met Lottie, despite hearing a lot about her. And he certainly hadn’t envisioned meeting her like this, not after the false wedding and the real love declaration. He felt his cheeks heat up as he loosened his grip around Louis’ waist and smiled bashfully. “Oh I’m Lottie by the way, heard a lot about you. Especially a few minutes ago when my brother couldn’t stop talking about what a cake you looked in that white suit and how losing you was the worst thing that had happened to him. Being real dramatic, this idiot, after taking all the wrong decisions. It’s been twelve hours, hello.”

“He is an idiot, right?” Harry offered just to get in her good side and was rewarded with a gleeful laughter. He didn’t understand the cake part so he would have to ask later. Louis didn’t look so gleeful and Harry scrunched his nose while feeling endeared. “Never thinks anything all the way through.”

“Never takes care of himself either.”

“Can’t dress casual in case of disappointing someone.”

“Never knows when to shut up and listen.”

“I’m right here, you know!” Louis exclaimed loudly, a little furrow between his eyebrows as he narrowed his eyes at the two of them. There was a smile threatening to overtake his face as he leaned into Harry’s side and turned to face his sister. The other two laughed, with Harry squeezing Louis’ hip and it finally made his facade crack as he joined in the laughter, shaking his head. “It’s going to be a pain now that my two fussy caretakers have met each other. I’m going to have a hard time. But also, I’m really glad you found something common to talk about, which is me. Really glad.”

“Just let yourself be happy, you dumbass,” Lottie remarked with an eye roll and a smile. “Won’t kill you, you know. Don’t be so uptight.”

“I’m your older brother!”

“Not acting like one today,” she countered, crossing her arms over her chest while Harry laughed, burying his nose into Louis’ hair. “But no sarcasm, I’m glad you sorted your shit and woman-ed up. Louis is really dense, you know Harry. Course you do. But let’s head in since we have a lot to talk about and don’t want the neighbours to know everything. Also, you’re late to your interview at the immigration office, you know.”

“Um actually...” Louis started before Lottie cut him off, waving his hand.

“Yeah I figured that's why I called and postponed it to Friday. You can thank me now.”

She looked at Louis expectantly while he muttered halfhearted gratitude that everyone knew he actually meant. Lottie winked at Harry before she headed inside and making a show of picking up the tissue Louis had thrown around. Harry laughed at the sass that ran in the family, apparently. It felt all too familiar with Lottie since she spoke exactly like Louis did on good days, except with a thicker accent. Harry sat on the sofa tucked into Louis’ side the whole evening, listening to Lottie as she told him childhood stories. Harry laughed and teased Louis, who retaliated with sarcasm. It was nothing like Harry had expected the day to end yet he didn’t mind it. In fact, he could get used to it. Yeah sure he still had to call Gemma but she would understand and wait for at least a few more hours until she bombarded Harry’s phone demanding details. He’d handle her then maybe, since he didn’t want to move away from Louis just yet.

“So what do you think about roses?” Louis asked when Lottie left them alone for a few minutes to order them pizza. He looked at him with raised eyebrows and Harry understood that he didn’t mean flowers, but more. He raised his eyebrows as well, waiting for the follow up. “I have a ring for you.”

“Another one?” Harry asked, laughing for some reason. He had a feeling Louis would spoil him with gifts. He probably wouldn’t mind it, as long as he saw that smile on Louis’ face. He leaned into kiss Louis, mainly because he could. They had a lot to talk about, a lot to sort but he had a feeling it would all work out splendidly.

***

_ Epilogue. _

 

“Louis, come on out you’re making us late!” Harry called out and Louis smiled as he pulled a grey hoodie over his head. That was an overstatement really, since there were four more hours to their flight and two more hours to leave. Hence he took his merry time standing in front of the floor length mirror, patting down his hair and grinning. He heard the soft padding of feet before Harry’s grumpy face appeared by the door, and he stood there hands crossed and staring intently at Louis’ back. Louis bit his lip as he stared at Harry’s reflection while running his fingers through his hair. It took about two minutes for Harry to huff and give in, walking until he was wrapping himself along Louis’ back and pressing a kiss to his shoulder. “Why do you never listen?”

“Because you’re clingy,” Louis replied, leaning back into the touch with a wide grin on his face. It had been five years and Louis still was surprised by how happy Harry made him. Just his presence made him smile and feel proud of his man, who had achieved so much. It was so easy to be with Harry, even if it was a new thing for Louis. It wasn’t as if they didn’t fight, of course they did since they were stubborn people but it took them at most a day before giving in. On most days, it would Louis giving in first because it would be his action that caused the disagreement and he was getting used to letting go of his ego. But Harry was the clingy one in the relationship easily. And Louis was right about getting there. “And you were calling for me to cuddle with you on the sofa.”

“You look like a teddy bear, I can’t help it,” he mumbled against Louis’ hoodie as he squeezed him around his waist and Louis laughed, lacing his fingers through Harry’s. “Now come on, let’s make out on the couch before we absolutely have to leave. I missed you the past few weeks.”

“You’re clingy,” Louis said once again as he laughed, letting Harry drag him downstairs. “Slow down, will you?”

Harry hummed.

They had moved to the suburbs two years ago when the two of them decided it was time. It was a large house, a little away from work but it was worth it. There was a big courtyard, where Harry and Louis had their second wedding, well the first official one. Only four people present there knew the first was a sham, which included Harry and Louis, while the others thought it was a vow renewal ceremony. It was a grand affair and all of Harry’s family was invited along with their co-workers. They weren’t Harry’s co-workers at that point since he had quit Colden Books four years ago. Louis was at the same position but wasn’t so angry and cold anymore. He was polite and sarcastic, his real self. It took a while for their co-workers to get used to it but once they did, they showered Harry with their gratitude. He still laughed about it while Louis rolled his eyes fondly. Harry was definitely the one to make Louis into a softer person for sure. There was no denying.

It had taken a long talk for them, where Louis revealed the truth about when he started liking Harry and the latter acted dramatically to it. Sure it was awkward since Louis didn’t know how to be in a relationship while Harry was a little too in. But Harry convinced Louis to relinquish the control he had over his job and while Harry was still his assistant, they managed to get Ben fired. It was every bit as satisfying as Louis had imagined. It was tough not seeing Harry every moment of the day when Louis got a new assistant, and Harry was just a little jealous of not getting the attention. Hence he randomly popped up, since he claimed he had ample amount of time. Louis never loved his life more.

And after five years together, it was alright, they were alright and they had made it through everything. Together.

“Sit,” Harry said with no force behind his voice before almost pushing Louis down on the sofa. He wrapped his arms around Louis and hummed contently. “That’s better.”

“You know, Harold,” Louis started, carding his fingers through Harry’s hair. He was such a cat. “Just because you’re the new, upcoming author whose book is a New York Times Best Seller doesn’t mean you can be bossy.”

“Oh yeah?” Harry asked, looking up at him with a cocky grin. Louis raised his eyebrows in challenge, meeting Harry halfway in a kiss. “Can’t even be bossy to my editor? Or to my husband? On our marriage anniversary?”

“Fake marriage anniversary,” Louis corrected, laughing into the kiss and leaned back. He pulled on one of Harry’s curls and grinned. His hair grown long enough to almost touch his shoulder, still in a state of unruly mess. It was beautiful and luscious and Louis loved it. “And especially not then.”

“I can too,” Harry insisted as his teeth grazed against Louis’ neck.

Louis squirmed. “Also, one of the two books... your bestseller by the way, is actually written about me. So, well, I can bossy but not you.”

“Hey!” Harry protested, cheeks flushing immediately. “It is not about you.”

“You can’t lie to me, Harold,” Louis teased with an eye roll, laughing when Harry turned further red, enough to match his shirt. He poked Harry’s stomach, right where he was ticklish and watched him squirm and giggle. “The love interest is a British guy. He has a French name and has blue eyes and quick wit. Who does Laurent remind me of? Hmm.”

“Doesn’t remind me of you surely,” Harry maintained even though there was a dedication in the book, made out to Louis for inspiring it. Louis’ cheeks were hurting from smiling so wide, as they always did when they had this ‘argument’. Harry jutted out his bottom lip, blinking his big eyes. “Okay but it’s the anniversary of when we got together. Won’t you indulge me still?”

“Hmm maybe alright.” Louis moved to connect their lips again, parting his lips to let Harry’s tongue in. Five years, he thought and smiled. His hands settled on Harry’s waist, feeling his stomach flutter still. Maybe it would never stop fluttering.

Maybe that was a good thing.

***

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So i might be thinking of writing a sequel, which mainly consists of around the immigration interview and basically a time stamp. If people are interested.

**Author's Note:**

> Kudos and comments are appreciated!  
> Hi since my work has been revealed, you can find me on [ twitter ](https://twitter.com/rainbowslovehl) come and say hi (oops!).  
> Rebloggable post can be found [ here ](http://rainbowsandlovehl.tumblr.com/post/177059373918/in-sickness-and-in-health-by-rainbowslovehl) so if you wanna talk more about the fic...


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